what do u use 4 self defense? Pepper spray?

I may need to drive across the desert alone from Phoenix to LA. I lived in LA for 30 yrs, so I know a lot about it. Should I get some pepper spray? I guess I should carry it in my purse so the 110 degree heat here doesn’t make it leak in the car. But I could forget it’s in my huge carryall purse and I have grandkids ages 5 and 8.
What are you ladies using for self defense these days?

I was carrying pepper spray. I’m glad I didn’t have to use it. Plus, I kept getting it taken away whenever I went through security.

I've thought about pepper spray, but I take some comfort that I use a cane and might hit somebody with it if necessary.

I have a "neck knife". It this necklas with a blade attached and all I have to do is reach under my shirt and pull it out if I need it, and its really small.

I used to wear a necklace that looked like a pen, but you could pull off the cap and it was a little blade. I wore that and carried a key chain that had a metal ball on the end when I used to go out to clubs by myself back in the day.

Luckily, I never had to use them.

What I've learned in the USMC, anything can be used as a "weapon of opportunity." Because I don't know whether pepper spray is legal or not, and because I don't want anything illegal on my record, I prepare by having a pen or a pencil on my person.

Possible trigger:

You can stab someone with a pen or pencil. You can poke their eye out or put holes in them with a pen or pencil.

Other "weapons" that can be used is really anything in the room or on your person, like a belt, the straps of your purse, your keys between your knuckles. Anything.

But, if you're like me, it doesn't matter what training I've had or what is on my person, I'd freeze, dissociate, flee, or use some sort of psychology to persuade the offender to leave me alone - such as acting really crazy and not worth his or her time, or siding with the offender and acting all friendly until I could get a shot in or flee, etc.

My hypervigilence is high, so I play scenarios in my mind whenever I feel like I'm walking in or around dangerous territory. I think ahead, but I mostly spend time indoors to feel safe. It's exhausting thinking like this.

And this notion that they send r*p* victims to self-defense is absurd. Those in the military had self-defense and offense fighting training, and still, their MST (military s**ual trauma) was too much for them to fight against. Same thing with civilian women, disabled persons, etc. Some may learn to fight, but that's sending a message that victims are to blame for their lack of training, or lack of capable guardianship. B*****t! Even if you're a parapalegic, or a child, or a wrestling champion, it's never your fault when you're attacked; it's the offender's fault for attacking you.

So yeah, I have defensive strategies, but I first consider the offender culpability in all this.

Nothing. I don't use anything to defend myself, and I've never been attacked. Now, to be perfectly clear, I'm not saying it never happens, and I personally might deflect a lot of would be attackers because I give off a vibe like I'm looking for a fight. On the other hand, I used to walk around by myself in shady parts of town during the wee hours of the morning on a nightly basis, and I never even got so much as a vague threat. I feel that, if stranger attacks on women were as common as so many people seem to believe, I at least would've had one challenger. Not so. I had exactly zero.

Again, not to minimize anyone's experience in case I'm abnormal in this regard, but I feel like this "need for self defense" is kinda overblown, and perhaps even deliberately overblown in an attempt to sell "defense classes" to people who would otherwise have no interest in martial arts or weird "defense" weapons that can be hidden in purses and bras.

I used to drive from Texas to Minnesota alone without a phone. I had two large flashlights I carried with me when I stopped at rest areas. They are legal and powerful. I had two cause they balanced me when I did jumping jacks to wake up and get energized up for driving. I normally drove straight though only stopping for gas and bathroom breaks. Remember any weapons can be taken away and used against you.

Personal alarm clipped to my bag.