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#1
Oct 26, 2010, 09:06 PM
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Okay, so I've posted once before about how my husband has been unemployed for 2 1/2 years and has only applied for about a handful of jobs because all the other jobs "he's over qualified for..." (his words....)
Well, I finally laid down the law to him. I'm NOT paying his car insurance (he has no job to go to... so no need for that!), and I'm NOT paying his cellphone bill (we aren't on a family plan). Those two bills alone are over $140 a month, and that's groceries for almost two weeks for the three people that live in my house. I'm the sole income person in my house, and if he's not going to help out around the house with chores or try to find a job somewhere, I'm not rewarding him with gas money to drive 45 minutes two or three times a week to visit his mom. I've had it. I don't care if I sound like a ****** about it anymore. I'm absolutely done. So, he gets his message from Verizon that his cell phone will be disconnected soon if he doesn't pay that past due amount. He calls his mom to pay it, and she just starts bawling. The woman is overly emotional, anyways.... such a drama queen... more than me, in fact! So she's crying and just babbling about how she's upset that she can't pay ALL of his bills for him, and she's upset that she can't call him and he can't call her.... blah blahbity blah blah blah... Her baby boy blah blah blah.... (can you tell where I stand on the MIL issue???) So, anyways, my "sweet hubby" texts me to tell me this... not sure if this is supposed to be a guilt trip into paying his bill.... But I'm still not doing it! ANGRY FACE!!!! aaaarggggh  Okay... now that I got that out of my system.... have I over reacted??  LOL I'm just sick and tired of him mooching off me and living scot-free in MY house not paying bills, eating food (and complaining about some of it), and then complaining that I'm not paying his cellphone and car insurance.
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A good friend once told me: All the things that you are doing for others DO NOT GO IN VAIN, and it may seem that you are not getting a return, but you are, maybe not now, but God never lets any good deed go unrewarded. "How can I feel abandoned, even when the world surrounds me; How can I bite the hand that feeds the strangers all around me; How can I know so many; never really knowing anyone; If I seem superhuman I have been Misunderstood." |
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#2
Dec 20, 2010, 06:26 PM
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How have things turned out? I fully support you in cutting back unnecessary items....Goodness! I wish everyone would do that. I often read how people say they don't have any money for food or their medications this month, yet they have cell phones and ahem internet service? Sorry, I grew up in an age that you didn't buy what you didn't have money to buy.
Give an update, ok? how are you doing?
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 MissingMyOldSelf
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#3
Dec 22, 2010, 11:16 AM
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I don't find anything wrong with what you decided. Maybe since they're so upset he should go live with his mama again for awhile?
 Then they wouldn't have the gas and phone problems.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
| MissingMyOldSelf
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#4
Dec 22, 2010, 11:37 AM
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I think it is totally acceptable for you to turn off his phone if he is unwilling to try and help provide for you and the family. Maybe he needs this wake up call to either go out and get a job or in the least help out around the house more.
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| MissingMyOldSelf
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#5
Dec 28, 2010, 10:08 PM
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Well, the phone is still off... his mom paid his car insurance on a car that can't be driven in snow ( a corvette my dad gave me when he passed away), and he's still not doing a thing about it. I, however, have laid the law down when I go to the grocery and I tell him that we have a strict list to stick to, and if he goes and wants something that's not on the list, he needs to pay for it.
what??? no money??? aw, darn honey... guess we can't get it! (evil snicker) I try to keep the grocery bill to $100 or less a week for three people. My mentally handicapped brother lives with us, and we both try to pack our lunches so we save money that way. But the hubs doesn't understand that I dont have the money to go to Steak N Shake every night. He thinks that since I make $$$$ a month, we can afford ANYTHING. The sad part is: I feel like he's holding me back. I want a family. I want children, but I refuse to do so until he gets a job. I don't want to bring a child into a home where I'm living on such a tight budget that I can't afford to feed myself and the others living in my home comfortably. I hate this stress, and it's really taking a toll on me, and he doesn't seem to notice.... or care, probably.
__________________
A good friend once told me: All the things that you are doing for others DO NOT GO IN VAIN, and it may seem that you are not getting a return, but you are, maybe not now, but God never lets any good deed go unrewarded. "How can I feel abandoned, even when the world surrounds me; How can I bite the hand that feeds the strangers all around me; How can I know so many; never really knowing anyone; If I seem superhuman I have been Misunderstood." |
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#6
Feb 01, 2011, 06:36 PM
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Quote:
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| MissingMyOldSelf
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#7
Feb 03, 2011, 11:40 PM
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Thank you Darryl! His phone has been disconnected for over 2 months, and the only thing I did to "help" him is that I got the MagicJack, so we now have a home phone that he can use. His insurance gets paid when he goes to help his mama out with anything she needs, and she pays him for that trip, which helps... and I'm still not bowing down.
I gave him the ultimatum after a huge fight this past Monday to find a job, or find a way to get his stuff out and down to his mom's. It's been over 2 1/2 years since he found a job, and I'm not going to put up with him not helping me around the house at all. My only fear is that somehow, in the divorce or dissolution, that I would be told to pay spousal support. Not sure how this works, but since he hasn't worked, hasn't looked, hasn't enrolled in school, and since we don't have a baby or anything, would I be forced to pay spousal support?
__________________
A good friend once told me: All the things that you are doing for others DO NOT GO IN VAIN, and it may seem that you are not getting a return, but you are, maybe not now, but God never lets any good deed go unrewarded. "How can I feel abandoned, even when the world surrounds me; How can I bite the hand that feeds the strangers all around me; How can I know so many; never really knowing anyone; If I seem superhuman I have been Misunderstood." |
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