What do I do? HELP!!!

Once upon a time I had a very well paying job in Connecticut as a Financial Analyst. We had just purchased our first home and upgraded our cars to more reliable ones. Everything was going great....then one day I lost my job, then the equity dropped on our house, it became upside down, so we lost our house. We had to move to Oklahoma where my husband was able to find work with insurance (which I HAVE to have for BP). The pay was a third of what I was making. We have struggled for the last three years trying to make ends meet. I actually worked at Arby's part time while my kids were in school so we could pay bills (found a little bit better job now). Eventually we got behind on our payments $1800 behind (three car payments). Every month I have my bills ranked in order, and my car was always last, and that is only becasue food was ranked right above it. Now I feel like I should let the car get repoed. That would free up $600 a month for us. It seems stupid that I should drive such a nice vehicle and my family barely has enough to eat. The sad thing is that the bank is really upseting me, they call me at work. Honestly they have told me I need to go on public assistance (hello, I make too much money for that)...they told me to go to a church and ask for money. One day I was sobbing at my desk listening to the women on the phone tell me she is a single mother, makes less money than us, and can pay her bills and still have money to go shopping. They told me that my home life must be screwed up if my husband and I cant make these payments. They call me at work everyday. I feel like a piece of crap and I keep making a payments when I can...despite my family needs. I feel I have to? We are looking into filling bankrupcy, but what do I do now? How do I get these people to leave me alone. How long until they get my car...can they find it, can they garnish my check. I need someone to tell me it is okay to let the car go back. I have honestly tried. My god I wore a stupid cowboy hat when roastburgers came out at Arby's to pay my bills. We just lost everything...does that make me a bad person?

no! that certainly doesn't make you a bad person.sounds like you and hubby are doing the very best you can. i'm not sure of this but i don't believe it's allowable by law for your creditor to contact you at work. if they are calling on your cell, try blocking those calls...altho they use many different numbers..the other thing you can do is not answer the call. if they are calling your workplace number find out if this legally allowable. if it is not, REPORT THEM AND FILE A COMPLAINT.
you and hubby will need to decide what to do about your car. i'd google re the repo law in your state. at least you will have an understanding/knowledgeable of what you may the procedures are. keep posting and don't keep your frustrations bottled up. it will only magnify the situation.
i applaud you/hubby for all you have done to try to stay afloat.
we care and know we understand what you are going thru.

It is unlawful for bill collectors to call your place of employment. Tell them to stop or you will report them.

Would it be possible to sell the car so that you can pay off what you owe and maybe make a bit of cash?

The creditor told me that they could call me at work becasue it was a first party and they didnt have another number, but doest that make it legal? I guess I can give them my cell number but we have decided that the car needs to go back...so what do we have to talk about now? We have told them that we have made that decision, then they said they didnt want the car? What the heck, I cant pay for it, but your not going to come get it? I dont understand. Anyway....I really appriciate hearing possitive feedback. I feel so alone, which seems silly considering what so many people have been going through. Honestly sometimes I feel like a victim. So many people before me have been chasing the "American Dream", we did and now I feel like we paying big time for that. Now what dream do I chase?

They have told me they can becasue they dont have another number to get in touch with us. My husband is a corrections officer and they call there. I have told them that they are not going to let him walk away from 100 inmates so he can talk to them on the phone?

hi golden, i don't think their reasoning would fly in a court of law re why they can call your work. REGARDLESS, don't giv'em your cell numbers tho. did you check the repo laws in your state? a word of caution, the ppl calling you are from a bill collector company. do not make any payments to them. if you all decide to keep the car only pay the company that gave you the loan. too long to explain but the collectors will tell you anything to get your money or get away with calling you. do not believe what they say.
keep us posted.