[Lost-&-Alone]

Hello and thank you. Its been really hard dealing with and coming to the realazation of my codependancy and depression problems. One reason I have put off dealing with these issues is the fear of loseing my job. I carry a gun, have a DOD security clearance, and the company I work for is nosey as hell, and loves to fire people that won't kiss their but. I won't and haven't kissed their but and seem to always be butting heads with them. I have recently started seeing a therapist that made me realize I was codependant, as well as seriously depressed. I told her I COULD NOT & WOULD NOT take meds to help me manage myself. That would have to be reported, if I didn't and something happened....... well let's just say that would not be good. I am glad to be able to talk about my problems with the annonamity of this boards. I can not afford to lose my job. I would lose everything if I did. I am new here, so I will probally ask a lot of questions and unfortunatly............ ask for help. Something I am not good at. So thank you all in advance.

Mike

[Lost-&-Alone]

hmmmmmmmm?

Would your therapist be open to you trying some herbal anti-depressant and stress relief remedies? Since I have no money and also do not want to be on meds, I've tried some well known remedies, and they are no miracle, but I did notice a slight improvement in my moods. I'm also not very consistent which would be a problem even if I did take meds. haha. I get depressed, and also have to cope with stress in a relationship. For example, last night, I was staring right into the truth of how my BF really thinks and feels about me. It's like he subconsciously reveals it, and I point it out, but then I'm accused of being crazy. I drank some tea of a known stress relieving herb, and felt calmer within 30 min. I don't think I'm allowed to recommend any herbs here, but just google herbal anti-depressant and herbal stress/anxiety relief. Check with your doc if you're on any other meds. for contraindications. Or research it yourself because some docs don't know that much about natural remedies. I also had a doctor recommend getting more Vitamin B rich foods in my diet because the B vitamins help your mind and body to cope with stress and depression.

[Seaswept]

Why would you have to report being on the meds? What about hippa?

[Lost-&-Alone]

Because its a different world when you carry a gun and other devices of that nature. You are required by law to report the use of ANY mind\mood altering drugs on or off duty. Its also a liability issue, for me and the company. When I am at work there are laws and rules to be followed. I handle my emotions. Well at work becaose of these. Its at home and away from work I don't have those guilelines and my "issues" become issues. How comfortable would you be if you feel if you knew a co worker had issues including anger management was on mind\mood altering drugs and carried several weapons including a loaded gun ?

[Seaswept]

That makes sense.

Well, I think seeing the therapist is a great start!

It has been proven exercise works a well as an antidepressant. So maybe therapy and exercise combined would help?

...Aquarius's suggestion is great too, definitely worth checking out. I have heard of others who manage their symptoms with herbs.

[Lost-&-Alone]

Thanks. I am trying to exercise, but just feel too tired and sore most of the time. I know my depression is causeing most of my aches and pains, can't seem to shake it. I know one exercise that would do WONDERS for me.......... b ut need to find a willing partner LOL