So, I have been dreading this all week ... my fave person at the office is going to be let go tomorrow

I understand completely what he is going through, because I had the same exact issues with the same exact people. I posted all about it here on PC not 8 months ago. I was dreading them coming to merge with us. I was dreading their drama. I was dreading THEM. I was miserable. That is when I got the lecture. And the remarks about "it just doesn't matter" and "grapes" from the owners .

The only reason I am still here is because I HAVE to be here. It is a tradeoff. Suck job for ability to work on my mental health issues. And it is my only source of (puny) income (but income nonetheless, and I am grateful).

HOWEVER, I am really pissed off about this stupid decision and want to call effing NY and say "what the effing eff are you thinking?" "This person is a GEM! You are throwing away the GOOD one!"

"dumb asses".

I am so po'd.

THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME VENT

[yellowted]

((hugs)) sometimes the good are let go simply to make the not so great top dogs feel better and boost their ego i am sure of it!

if the good guy is not happy about leaving they may have a case for unfair dismissal, but it could be that a good deal was made and leaving was in their best interest or simply the good guy got a better offer elsewhere or decided enough was enough and opted out!

I find smiling at everyone and being polite gets you a long way in befriending collegues and making life pleasent, even if you really think they are jerks, a smile costs nothing and uses less muscles than a scowl!

Thanks ((((Yellow)))) I totally agree with you regarding the dip***** boosting their egos

I KNOW he is not happy BECAUSE of the dips he has to work with. I was so unhappy. No matter what I did, they were awful.

I see things from his perspective, and they are horrible. AND they aren't very good at their jobs. And they are damaging the company. But when it comes down to it, it's 1 good person against a coven of witches, so ...

I have family ties on my side, so that is why I am here. Otherwise, I would have been toast, too.

I know he will find something much better (he is incredibly talented and is a wonderful leader), AND he will be fine financially. But seeing all of this mishegas .... ugh.

[Open Eyes]

I think that you should make sure you stay in touch with this nice person. If he is let go and he "is" nice and talented, he could find a better place to work. Annnnd, he may not mind having you with him in a better environment someday. Soooo, stay in touch Rose. Make sure you also let him know how you feel saddened that he is leaving. When you meet a good person, always find a way to stay connected.

Thanks ((((OE)))) when he talked to me yesterday, he said something about if when I get in, he may not be there so he wanted to say goodbye we would definitely keep in touch. We both have each others private number. He definitely is a keeper

Yeah, my bestie is gone ... he's on to bigger and better. (I know he will do well)

AND new good things though for the office

(I feel conflicted)

[Open Eyes]

Ok, well, pay attention to your feelings of conflict, you can even write them down in a journal. Understand that all changes can bring on a sense of "emotional conflict", so it is normal that you feel that.

Practice "self soothing" and "patience" and allow yourself to see what happens that could be more "positive" in whatever change is taking place. Keep an open mind. I always try to keep in my mind that saying, "God doesn't close a door without opening another one".

So I have been keeping in touch with my Pal. He left me a very funny, sweet Valentines message. The new gal has been with us a week and isnt looking as fresh, lovely and put together as the day she started. Pressure is on. The only difference is the other women arent giving her a load of **** on top of it. One of the women had the nerve to ask me sarcastically, "so you miss so and so" I just looked at her and replied,"everyone had a different relationship. I know in my heart though he will be fine. And no matter what the circumstances...I hate seeing that happen. To anyone. It is not a great feeling, " she suddenly got on board and looked...remorseful. great acting job on her part.

As for the new person, I have a feeling she will be wishing she was back working in the other industry shortly and ready to leave in 3 weeks. Tops. The honeymoon ended for her .... by looks ... the 3rd day. I hope she will feel free to come to me. Those other women...dont trust them as far as I can throw them. She shouldnt either. But I will let her figure that out on her own.

Sorry you're stuck in a toxic environment.

That can't be good for your mental health issues at all.

My pal and I continue to keep in touch. It means a lot to me because I considered him a friend and colleague. But friend first. He is doing well, and he is safe. He has been staying at his house in Palm Springs taking good care of himself, surrounding himself with good friends and although relaxing, also actively looking for a new, better job. He will be in town again in a week or so for meetings. I cant wait to see bis adorable lil face and to have a few laughs. He has a great sense of humor

[Open Eyes]

I think you are handling things well Rose, letting this new woman see things for herself. I hope you are supportive with her, and respectful, I am sure you are. Just be careful though, and keep it professional, even though you want to kinda rescue her if she starts to lose it under the pressure. It might get very tempting to add your personal feelings about how bad things are if she does break, but always remember that "can" be used against you if she begins to gain some ground inspite of the situation. Sometimes all it takes is some kind of ally for someone to make a stand and the "ally" or "sympathetic one" can be the one thrown under the bus. I have a few of those experiences in my past so I know how easy it is to become someone elses "excuse" if their effort to get in a better position somehow fails them. So just be careful.

[IowaFarmGal]

I hope he finds a great job that is looking for two people.

[avlady]

It's great to hear your friend is doing good, probably one reason is because he knows he has someone like you to connect with, even though he is away. I hope the new girl can see through your eyes, but it seems she's learning on her own.

Hi ((((OE)))) thank you. Frankly I dont trust her as far as I can throw her so no worries in terms of saying the wrong things that could jeopardize me.

I am and always am tremendously supportive to everyone at the office. Esp because I have a biz / family reputation to protect.

Luv, Rose

Originally Posted by Open Eyes

I think you are handling things well Rose, letting this new woman see things for herself. I hope you are supportive with her, and respectful, I am sure you are. Just be careful though, and keep it professional, even though you want to kinda rescue her if she starts to lose it under the pressure. It might get very tempting to add your personal feelings about how bad things are if she does break, but always remember that "can" be used against you if she begins to gain some ground inspite of the situation. Sometimes all it takes is some kind of ally for someone to make a stand and the "ally" or "sympathetic one" can be the one thrown under the bus. I have a few of those experiences in my past so I know how easy it is to become someone elses "excuse" if their effort to get in a better position somehow fails them. So just be careful.

[Open Eyes]

Originally Posted by Rose Panachée

Hi ((((OE)))) thank you. Frankly I dont trust her as far as I can throw her so no worries in terms of saying the wrong things that could jeopardize me.

I am and always am tremendously supportive to everyone at the office. Esp because I have a biz / family reputation to protect.

Luv, Rose

Yes, I figured you probably already knew what I said because you are so smart. But you are such a sweetie too, so I just wanted to make sure. You have been doing so well and growing and gaining that I want to see you keep on track with it.

Thank you thank you I couldnt have done.it without you and my PC resources.

Just trying really hard to be my authentic self and equally assert and protect myself. Others that are so insecure and threatened for whatever reason love to bully, find scapegoats and throw others under the bus. We know that is them, though, and we only give away our power .... based on fear and people pkeasing. Wanting to be "liked" and certainly not.get into game playing. No time for that.

Originally Posted by Open Eyes

[B]Yes, I figured you probably already knew what I said [/B]because you are so smart. But you are such a sweetie too, so I just wanted to make sure. You have been doing so well and growing and gaining that I want to see you keep on track with it.