Personality clash at work.

I'm having such anxiety at work that I'm starting to find it difficult to go in. I love my job and I get along with everyone that I work with. That is, everyone with the exception of the person that run's the show; I guess you could say.

Over the past month or so I've be screwed out of hours that I desperately need. I've been made a scapegoat on numerous occasions and am just generally being treated both unfair and unkind by this one individual. I attempted a conversation with said person about my concerns and things have since gotten worse. I don't get it. My psychiatrist told me that it's most likely a clash of personalities and that I should stick with the same field of work elsewhere. Quite idiotically, I went against my psychiatrist's advice and went back this week. Today was the last straw, I went on my lunch break and didn't go back. I told work that I would be out for the rest of the week and I will be working elsewhere Monday. It's starting to affect my work performance and that just makes me feel worse.

Why is it that we (people with various disorders) mostly seem to be targeted or treated unfairly? I know that comes across as a narcissist statement. But, when I look at our forum, and many other forums out there; it's a very common thing. We work our butts off and are very passionate about our jobs. But, we always seem to be the first one's thrown under the bus. I'm sure we take things more personally than others. But, why do we get treated like that in the first place?

My motto at work is to do my job well. Stay out of any drama or gossip and leave work at work. Even though I'm following that motto; things are still going awry.

Well, I'll leave it at that. I just really needed to get that out. Thank you kindly for reading. I feel a little better now.

BW76

I'm sorry you were being treated unkindly by your boss. I hope your next place of employment won't have that problem for you. I hope you had another job lined up before you quit.

I don't know that it is we have disorders that is the problem as much as that we find it difficult in the first place to work and I tend to take things too personally (other people often have similar problems but I don't see them/their lives that way). I know I was outspoken at my last job so my company owner did not like me.

It is hard to learn to weigh the entire package, know how personal/impersonal to be and whether we want to work more/less at a place, how much we want to put up with to work there, etc. There's always problems of some sort, there is no "perfect" job because we always have to do a range of work, not just things we enjoy doing and there are usually other people around we have to work with or who are jealous, don't like us for some other unknown reason of theirs or otherwise get in our way. Just when things have gotten "perfect" at my jobs, something will change; a friend will leave, the company be bought/reorganized, etc. and it will be time to reorganize my own responses.

Been there recently, done that. Better days are coming!

A clash of personalities will only get worse. Go find another job in the same field elsewhere.

Sometimes, working through a clash of personalities can be a learning experience and a test of perseverance. It can build character. Many work places have strong personalities. Some can be like that daily, and others a little here, a lot there, it depends.
Remember, those with the strong personalities, actually have feelings, too. It's a whole package.
Before one of my employees, became my employee, I'd witnessed many other employees walk out the door. She was at root of some of their displeasure in the workplace. I'd had a clash with her, back in '11 or was it '12? Early on in that particular year. I'd also been working with a woman, who, came to my life, at the right time, and who has a lot more patience and tolerance for those seemingly strong personality types. Not to say, she didn't clash with one person, that I didn't struggle with at all, and we bonded over talking it over, with little comments, such as, well, perhaps it was from this perspective. types of talks.
Over the years, this strong personality employee of mine and myself, both realized, we had one thing in common. No Quit. We are both at a point in our lives, that no matter, how hard we struggle with the work environment, this time, this job, this point in our lives...no quit.
There's aspects of her character, that can be as annoying as all hades. Yet, there's certain values that she has, that are completely admirable. I know, she's bi polar, for fact, and sometimes, when she's a little off, in her life, it can be a challenge. Yes, I get frustrated, at the same time, at the end of the day, she's really got a kind, sensitive heart. It's been about 4 years, working with her. I've seen people come, and people go, and get really hostile and resentful of her. And, deep down, I don't find it fair, for others, to not work on themselves, over it. There's ways to approach her, and ways to not approach her. I've learned that, through the years.
So, no matter, where we go, there we are....

Ugh. I had no choice but to go back to the workplace I was speaking of above. It wasn't awful. But, it certainly wasn't great either. I had one of those days where I feel that I could be doing so much more with my life. This job is good. It's the best job I've ever had really and it's the only job that I've stuck with for this long.

I just feel so stuck. I'm a single dad. I can't afford to go to school again. The only funding I would qualify for would be in some community college. On the note of community colleges; they are run like businesses here and have little to no accreditation. I'm currently working in education and feel; hell, I know that I'm capable of doing so much more.

BW76

You aren't limited to your local schools anymore. You can take courses at many different accredited schools. I don't know where you live but where I live two years at community college is automatic admission to a state university for residents. It's a pretty good deal because you can get the basics out of the way at the cheaper school and concentrate on your major. Another option is iTunes U. You can't earn credit but you can take courses in something you might be interested in to test it out. It's free.

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I appreciate the advice. But, unfortunately that's not the case where I live. Also, being a single dad makes it that much more complicated. Unfortunately, moving is not an option.

There is one college here that is accredited with our University; ironically enough; it's near impossible to get funding to go there and a line of credit/student loan is not an option.

I wasn't talking about moving. I was talking about online universities. Kaplan isn't available? A friend of mine is getting her masters remotely from a major university.

Also free courses:

http://www.openculture.com/free_certificate_courses

I don't know if you can use the cert for credit but, again, good way to explore a subject.

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I totally understand where you're coming from. Even my own mother treats me unfair. I hope your situation gets better. Mine is actually quite similar. :/

Hmmmmm, I'll have to check that out. I've heard of the free online courses; just haven't researched it.

Thanks again!

Some of the free online courses give you some sort of certificate if achievement, which you could always attach on your resume. Businesses don't care about credit (some do, can't get around that), but many places want college OR relevant work experience.
You may not get THE ideal job with free online classes, but perhaps, you get get the job which would get you the relevant years of work experience.

Just a thought.
And are you sure you have explored ALL your options to pay for college? Are there any special scholarships for single parents/fathers?

I think the cert is useless unless colleges are accepting it. I don't think there is a grade attached to it so I doubt colleges are accepting it. I was thinking it was a way to explore different majors before dumping all that money and time. Or to get a boost. Programming would be ideal if that is of interest because they really can't cover all languages in colleges. Plus a lot of them look interesting just for continuing education

But there are accredited universities online. There are even brick and mortar schools with online curriculums so if travel/relocation is an issue that is certainly an option. They are as good as being on campus as long as you can adapt to the learning process. The free courses might be a way to determine if you can indeed commit to an online course.

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Well, on a more positive note; I had no other option but to return to said place of work and things are now going quite well. I'm realizing that my emotional state does a really good job of making things seem worse than they actually are. The work situation isn't perfect. But, I've worked in places a heck of a lot worse.

BW76

So... there's no longer a clash at work. However, today will be my last day there as I was bumped out of my position by someone with more seniority. I'm not absolutely in a rut over this. But, I am pretty damn disappointed. I really enjoyed working there and absolutely adore my co-workers there. Ironically enough, the person I was have the clash with is going to try to get me in for a shift whenever possible to help me out. So, it's not entirely bad I suppose. Wow, positive thinking... who would've thunk? Lol

Happy Friday everyone!!

BW76