[Dust to Dust]

I don't know what to do about it. It's been 3 years since I've worked there. Before I went to college I interned there..then I went off to college..graduated and landed myself in retail because I needed some way of paying my loans every month. About a little over 1/2 a year ago I returned back to working at the office because it paid 13 an hour instead of my degrading 8.50 an hour slaving at Target. I also was very depressed at Target because that's where my girlfriend and I worked..it's where I met her..and she's my entire life..but she recently moved and working there without her felt more than lonely. So I left and now am here.

The thing is..after 3 years of working there, I never got a raise and it's miserable. The students that my boss keeps hiring are getting the same starting pay rate as me and it just feels kind of wrong. I don't think I'm the kind of person whose able to handle this job. I get really anxious. Our office is down in a dark basement and I feel kind of trapped. I don't know how else to explain it. Sometimes I feel like I'm just staring at the wall and that I'm not even in my own body, if that makes sense. Randomnly throughout the day, I'll start randomnly crying and it's embaressing because people can tell on the phone when I call them. Then I start biting and picking at my fingers..I think it's become a gross habbit of mine. The tips of my fingers are always raw. When I bite them though the pain feels really good espesially when the skin is right underneath my nail (I appologize if this is tmi). It's the day after where my fingers will hurt more than anything and then I regret biting them so badly because then I feel kind of self conscious about it. Maybe I'll write about this one in the OCD area..

Every single day at the office, I do the same thing. I answer phones. And I call people who don't want to be bothered. So naturally, I get angry, rude people telling me to fly off. The company basically sends a paper out to these people, some which do request it but the majority don't want it or have never heard of it. The company is run by 2 of the most degrading, rude people I have ever met. Oh and have I mentioned, my mother works there as well which makes it a thousand times as miserable because we hate each other.

I guess I just need advice from anyone else suffering in the office flow on how the hell to compose oneself? I just need to temporarily get by. I hope to quit in a few months because I desperately want to move in with my girlfriend.. but I literally dread every day going there. I feel like all is drained from me. There's no enjoyment or passion. I know I'm there for the money..and I also work 2 other jobs on top of this because of my college loans..and it all seems like too much..but I think it's just the office that kills me. Any tips on how to make it less horrible? I'm a people person and I feel isolated there.

[Almeera]

Keep your eyes on the prize, as the saying goes. You say that you will quit in a few months and move in with your girlfriend; would this be something that can get you through the day? If you're allowed to bring framed photos or other things to work, keep a picture of hers (or of you two together) somewhere you can see and keep reminding yourself that in a few months' time, you'll be together again and all this will be a bad dream.

Is there anything positive from your other two jobs you can use to counteract all the stress and negativity that this one is bringing into your life? You didn't mention what they are, are there any career prospects there?

Also - can I just say that I have mad respect for someone who can hold down one job, let alone three... You sound like a strong and determined individual, but I think you've yet to become aware of your full inner strength... Best of luck my friend, stay strong!

Adopt strategies to deal with fingernail biting. It's a reaction to stress and it is only making you more stressed. Have one of those stress balls. Get your nails done... The feel of painted nails is an immediate reminder not to bite them. Elastics on your wrists. When you get stressed you snap it to bring your attention back. It takes some practice to shift your habits. When you leave you don't want messed up nails so maybe concentrating on that as a goal will take your mind off the crap.

The following is something a group I worked with in a telemarketing job used to do. I think you can do it without involving other people. Start a list of worst/funniest/weirdest phone call of the day. The idea is to keep your mind creatively occupied and to add a little humor. If you do this make sure you don't leave it out. People might not get the joke.

Those are just some random ideas. You have a plan? Then it's only a matter of a ticking clock

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[Perna]

Can you get a job with a temporary agency and go to a variety of jobs so you can see what sort of work you might like better? I worked in a job like yours when I was at Sears in customer service, my first year out of college. I was in a basement and had to be at work before it was light out and left when it was dark, etc. and felt trapped like that. You have to get out of that environment; think of somewhere to go for lunch at least, a nearby library, somewhere else, your senses are under stimulated and that's not good in any event. I had to call people and tell them what they'd bought would not be delivered, was out of stock and got cussed at, etc., very stressful. See if you can find a regular phone answering job instead of having to call others who don't want to hear from you.

[winter4me]

Do job hunt. There is something out there for you, it may take time, but don't plan to stay where you are indefinitely. Just look...
What is your degree in? And, is there an activity you can do, yourself, that you will enjoy? As much as you love your girlfriend, it is not fair to her to be your "everything".
Hang in there, you have the tools to make changes.