[LiteraryLark]

I had a horrible day today. I was sent home early because I had only completed two checkouts by 2:00. My mind was racing the entire time and I was very angry and I could not focus whatsoever and had to leave my rooms unfinished while my thoughts were racing and it felt like I was never there. I am a housekeeper but I doubt my capabilities and do poorly despite showing that I am very well capable of doing a terrific job. I have never been able to keep a job for more than a few months because of my bipolar mood swings and work anxiety disorder and I go into a job expecting to fail.

The situation I have is that I initially applied for laundry and was told I would not cut it in housekeeping due to my resignation at the other hotel I worked at as a housekeeper, but in the interview they thought I would be a perfect front desk agent. The day for my front desk orientation they suggested I help out in housekeeping temporarily because I have experience. The first two months went very well and I improved immensely proving my bosses wrong that I was in fact capable of doing well in housekeeping. I completed front desk training and split shifts: two days front desk and three days housekeeping. After a month of doing both I realized and told them that in order to improve in front desk I needed to give it my undivided attention, so my boss agreed to let me work FT housekeeping until they get another housekeeper. Six months later we have three housekeepers, one permanent, one weekender, and one who also does front desk but now they want to be fully staffed. Well, in my first month they told me it would only be a month and then they kept extending and extending my time and six months later I am still in housekeeping and we still don't have enough housekeepers and now they don't think I can handle front desk because I am doing so poorly as a housekeeper.

I need to write a formal letter to my bosses explaining how I feel, but I don't know how to do that or what to say. I don't know what to do. I need help.

[Ukny96]

Why do you think you need a formal letter? Can't you just speak to your boss and have a frank conversation about what you'd really like to be doing? Rehearse what you're going to say first before approaching him/her. A letter is too much imho.

[LiteraryLark]

Because this is a reoccurring pattern in all of my jobs. I start out great and then spiral. I feel if I want to keep this job for the long term (hospitality is my career and I need to build a track record) I would like to address to my bosses that I need more support.

[LiteraryLark]

And I really don't want to end up on disability and lose my independence.

[LiteraryLark]

After venting to my mom and dad, I realized that none of my issues have anything to do with work. I am someone who gets triggered by external factors, and in the past two months I had my brother come home from the military and shared Christmas with him, Thanksgiving, my birthday, two weeks of a horrific vicious cold I had to endure at work, a major trip to SF, pleasure party, tattoos, holiday parties, and January 9th marks 6 years since my hospitalization. So I am seriously friggin burnt out but it has nothing to do with work itself or my capabilities of being a housekeeper.

So I will not write a letter to my boss, I'll just talk with them about it.