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  #26  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 10:36 AM
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leomama leomama is offline
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Originally Posted by seesaw View Post
I get it, it's a pet peeve. You have PTSD, worry is part of your everyday mindset. So it just irritates you when they say that...


Check out the pet peeve thread in General Social Chat. I think you'll like it there.




Lol, no it's not. It goes deeper. When I worry there's a reason for it. I'm an empath and I pick up on my customers worry. My coworkers are insensitive on purpose. You don't understand. They are the cynical, jaded and bitter ones. Maybe I did not make that clear.

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  #27  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 10:37 AM
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Lol. I know the solution to my anger. Look. A) I'm at the tail end of generation x. B) I do have sympathy for them although they have no empathy for me. They're afraid to be me because I've been knocked around by life. I moved out at 18 and nobody paid my way. C) I didn't come on here to feel sorry for them. I was simply stating I can not identify with or relate to them. Driving cars and going to school under the shelter of their parents roof? They have zero complaints. Not having to worry about putting food on the table, preparing it much less preparing it for their own families?
You're over generalizing the whole generation. And yes, they can have complaints. No one person's trauma invalidates another's.

I don't know why you think everyone is paying their way either. Being tail end of Gen X, many of my friends are millenials, and I work with a lot of millenials, and no one is handing them anything. They live with their parents to cut costs, but they still worry about affording rent at their parents, making car payments, making ends meet. Many have children and worry about caring for their children.

You're scapegoating an entire generation.

if you have a pet peeve about "no worries" then have the pet peeve, but maybe try and see how judgmental you are being of them when you don't understand their situation or what they have been through.

Seesqaw
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
  #28  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 10:39 AM
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Originally Posted by seesaw View Post
You're over generalizing the whole generation. And yes, they can have complaints. No one person's trauma invalidates another's.


I don't know why you think everyone is paying their way either. Being tail end of Gen X, many of my friends are millenials, and I work with a lot of millenials, and no one is handing them anything. They live with their parents to cut costs, but they still worry about affording rent at their parents, making car payments, making ends meet. Many have children and worry about caring for their children.


You're scapegoating an entire generation.


if you have a pet peeve about "no worries" then have the pet peeve, but maybe try and see how judgmental you are being of them when you don't understand their situation or what they have been through.


Seesqaw


Lol. Did you see what I said about them being jaded, cynical and bitter? Or that when I worry it is out of incredible empathy for my customers which many of my coworkers do not have. Many of my coworkers hate people. I do not.
  #29  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 10:42 AM
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There are good people from all generations, and bad people from all generations. It is dangerous to generalize, like you are doing. And that attitude is conveyed to your co-workers.
  #30  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 10:44 AM
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Originally Posted by scaredandconfused View Post
There are good people from all generations, and bad people from all generations. It is dangerous to generalize, like you are doing. And that attitude is conveyed to your co-workers.


Lol! Wow! Did you not read what I said about them being bitter, jaded and cynical? I didn't come on this board to be convinced I was wrong. If you like working with people who are that negative towards customers, that's fine for you. I don't see the point of discussing this further.
  #31  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 11:41 AM
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Originally Posted by leomama View Post
Lol! Wow! Did you not read what I said about them being bitter, jaded and cynical? I didn't come on this board to be convinced I was wrong. If you like working with people who are that negative towards customers, that's fine for you. I don't see the point of discussing this further.
We are just trying to help you. Sometimes people are going to disagree on the forums.

I'm sorry your PTSD is bothering you at work. I hope things get better and you can find some coping skills to help.
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
Thanks for this!
graystreet
  #32  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 11:46 AM
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Originally Posted by seesaw View Post
We are just trying to help you. Sometimes people are going to disagree on the forums.


I'm sorry your PTSD is bothering you at work. I hope things get better and you can find some coping skills to help.


Lol. I wasn't asking for help. I was asking for identification. I wasn't asking to be changed. I work in a high stress environment and having ptsd makes it worse but that's the way it goes. I love my job and the people I work with but not their attitudes towards customers. Their life outside of work is none of my business. It's common in my field for workers to be mad at customers but I know better.
  #33  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 01:41 PM
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Originally Posted by leomama View Post
Lol. I wasn't asking for help. I was asking for identification. I wasn't asking to be changed. I work in a high stress environment and having ptsd makes it worse but that's the way it goes. I love my job and the people I work with but not their attitudes towards customers. Their life outside of work is none of my business. It's common in my field for workers to be mad at customers but I know better.
Okay, well, I'm sorry that I don't identify with you. I also have PTSD and work in a high stress environment. I learn to manage my triggers and use coping mechanisms for when others trigger my PTSD symptoms.

Seesaw
__________________


What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
  #34  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 02:47 PM
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graystreet graystreet is offline
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Is there something in what the people responding are saying which is causing defensiveness? Because, while the intent of the original post may have been to vent, I think that the intent of other people here on PC is to help. Indeed, that is the way people are wired...someone states an issue or problem or however you want to categorize it and other people naturally want to help. I suppose if you don't want help, it would be helpful to state that in the original post. This way, people would know not to offer it, which might be less frustrating.

As far as what one poster said about coworkers sensing displeasure with them, yes. This is really a thing. I have been in that position, going both ways. Even if someone doesn't voice it to me, I can tell when they disapprove of me, and it makes me uncomfortable and brings down the work environment. Conversely, I have been the one to disapprove of others and have, probably rightly so, found that my working relationship with them in a team environment didn't go as smoothly as I would have wished. Even though, in that environment, I was always outwardly pleasant.
  #35  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 04:23 PM
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I knew I shouldn't have posted this morning, I was feeling..confrontational.
Sorry Leo.
We all have our blind spots. this one got the better of me.
  #36  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 05:51 PM
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Originally Posted by ReptileInYourHead View Post
I knew I shouldn't have posted this morning, I was feeling..confrontational.

Sorry Leo.

We all have our blind spots. this one got the better of me.


Yeah thanks.
  #37  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 05:52 PM
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Um I was posting this to state a frustration which I've let go of as a result of this thread so you helped. Thx.
Hugs from:
graystreet
Thanks for this!
seesaw
  #38  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 05:52 PM
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Originally Posted by seesaw View Post
Okay, well, I'm sorry that I don't identify with you. I also have PTSD and work in a high stress environment. I learn to manage my triggers and use coping mechanisms for when others trigger my PTSD symptoms.


Seesaw


I'm happy for you!
Thanks for this!
seesaw
  #39  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 09:18 PM
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Um I was posting this to state a frustration which I've let go of as a result of this thread so you helped. Thx.
Awesome, good to hear.

I sometimes get super annoyed when I'm frustrated and people try to fix it. No, just let me be frustrated.
Thanks for this!
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  #40  
Old Mar 14, 2017, 10:43 PM
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Awesome, good to hear.


I sometimes get super annoyed when I'm frustrated and people try to fix it. No, just let me be frustrated.


Yes! I got over it! At least today I hope it lasts till tomorrow )
  #41  
Old Mar 15, 2017, 11:40 AM
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Originally Posted by leomama View Post
If I say something grates on me I'm not looking to be challenged, you know? I'm looking for empathy and support not to be told I'm wrong for feeling the way I do or to be judged. I'm simply speaking of my emotions, not my attitude. I had to leave home at 18, married at 24, divorced as a mother at 29. I don't identify with these adults who are living with their parents at those ages.
I hope people will be honest with me---and some who have challenged me have helped me the most. I tend to consider anger and irritation as secondary to anxiety/threat/fear; or some of the signs of Depression.

Giving honest feedback is a part of being supportive. If we are able to step back and look at something from another's view point (empathy) ---which is often only possible by allowing yourself into uncomfortable territory that may challenge your feelings/beliefs---we grow as people. In turn, those people get to learn a whole lot from you that they didn't think of or know, or have any reason to know. I have supported myself since a teen, left home, worked worked worked, married, school, divorce, lost family and friends to tragedies, got a profession etcetcetc. My adult children are awesome. Younger people are altered by getting to know an older person and vice versa. Someone in an older generation didn't think much of you when you were young...doesn't make them righter/better/more worthy.
I DO feel empathy for you, it is not easy to deal with strong emotions in a work place. But you can only change how you deal with this.
Your feelings are your feelings and I would say "Yes they are real feelings". I am sorry it hurts you. Now. what do you do with this? This is the tip of an underlying big deal for you.
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  #42  
Old Mar 15, 2017, 11:48 AM
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Lol. Did you not see I was over it?
  #43  
Old Mar 15, 2017, 11:51 AM
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when I left home i could rent an apartment for $100/month (200 if I wanted to be in nyc) made $1.65 an hour, was able to live on that, with a roommate in school with very little money but good cooking skills.....me working 6 days a week.
I remember being thrilled to earn #3/hour, same as they paid techies in those days...
plus, the rich towns put out big items once a week, so we could furnish an apartment for free---now that rarely happens in any town---and you can't go dump picking anymore. Or go to school on the wages of a job----my mother got her Master paid by caretaking a house....dad got the GI bill....I could have gone to school in the midwest for 200/yr
But....income has not at all kept up with the cost of food/essentials and that is a researched fact. I make the same now as I did in 1990. The salaried have gone down for new RN/BSNs.
When an extended family situation works, it is good for everyone. My kids left home after
HS, but they did help me, in their teens, care for my mother with sudden onset dementia...
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  #44  
Old Mar 15, 2017, 11:51 AM
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Lol. Did you not see I was over it?
No. And I don't see it now.
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  #45  
Old Mar 15, 2017, 11:52 AM
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But I can be wrong.
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  #46  
Old Mar 15, 2017, 11:53 AM
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I do not want to talk about this anymore. I've developed empathy for my coworkers but more important then that their life outside of work is none of my business. As a single mother living in the suburbs I have my own challenges.
  #47  
Old Mar 15, 2017, 11:53 AM
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No. And I don't see it now.


I don't want to talk about it anymore. It was a simple frustration I didn't want fixed.
  #48  
Old Mar 15, 2017, 11:55 AM
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But I can be wrong.


Perhaps you should start your own thread to
Talk about your own issues? You have a lot to say about issues That aren't relevant here.
  #49  
Old Mar 15, 2017, 12:30 PM
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LeoMama, a suggestion: If you are intending to rant about something in the future, designate the thread as such, a rant. Otherwise people will come forth to offer you help to solve what they perceive to be a problem that you are asking help for.
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  #50  
Old Mar 15, 2017, 12:33 PM
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Perhaps you should start your own thread to
Talk about your own issues? You have a lot to say about issues That aren't relevant here.
Leomama, I feel you are being quite rude here. You may say you are "over it" but that doesn't mean someone can't choose to add their thoughts to a thread. Your thread has brought up issues that many people deal with, so it's not just about you.

If you wish to no longer hear responses, which I can respect, you can unsubscribe from the thread, or you can ask an admin to close it. But it is unnecessary to be rude to people who continue to comment or provide feedback.

I know it's difficult working while struggling with PTSD. I can totally identify with you. I deal with it everyday myself. Along with the generalized anxiety disorder and severe chronic major depressive disorder. We are here to support you, and we want to help, even if that means providing a different perspective. Please try to remember that no one is trying to tell you that you are wrong, we're just trying to help you see it from a different perspective and in doing so, feel less anger about the situation.

Please don't push away people who just want to help. If you are not in a place to hear further comments or feedback, use your self-care strategies by unsubscribing to the thread or simply not responding. I understand where you're coming from, being over it, I've been there myself, but no need to chastise people who want to contribute.

Seesaw
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
Thanks for this!
Artchic528
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