Should I stop working with this student?

I am a college admissions essay editor on a part-time basis. I tend to do a lot of rewriting and editing when I help students with their college admissions essays because, honestly, some of the students write in vague, self-promoting, cliched ways that don't show strong writing skills and make them come off as self-promoting careerists who have been plotting their Harvard admission since they were 2 years old.

I am working with one girl now, and she is intelligent and energetic, but she is not so intelligent that she develops her ideas in enough depth or provides concrete details. And she repeatedly talks about her "passion" for this and her "passion" for that without explaining why she's passionate, or showing evidence of her passion. So I rewrote a good part of her essay using her facts and her basic ideas but the wording and deeper development and deeper analysis came from me.

So she changed a good part of it back to her original version, which is wordy, repetitive, superficial, self-promoting, undeveloped, etc. I am glad she wants her voice to come through, but at the same time, she is being thin-skinned and should learn from somone who is a better writer and just improive her writing skills. Rejecting legitimate criticism is not a recipe for skill improvement.

Should I stop working with this girl? I need the money, and, honestly, she is creating work for me by creating new writing problems for me to solve. Still, it is annoying having a high school student reject my professional writing advice just because her feelings are hurt.

The role of a tutor is to offer the student helpful advice. And, like the adage goes, "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink." You sound annoyed that this student changed your revisions back to her original essay. That is par for the course where tutoring is concerned. To insult the student as "thin-skinned," and to insult her again, "should learn from someone who is a better writer and just improve her writing skills," makes me question why you ever wanted to become a teacher to begin with, if you despise students so much? You seem to have a lot of contempt for this particular student. Students seek tutoring help, because they are not confident in their academic abilities. They look at their tutor as a role model, a guide, a facilitator, someone who is empathetic, and encouraging and kind.

I think you should reconsider a career in education and choose another field. You don't come across empathetic or supportive (to me) but moreso insulting and patronizing. I've done tutoring with college students, and I don't take it personally when they revert to their original essay after I have provided them with my revision suggestions. It is the student's paper. If they don't like my suggestions, that is FINE with me. All I can do -- and all you can do -- is offer your suggestions to the students that you tutor, and accept the fact that they may not use all, but just some of your revision suggestions.

I really don't get a sense that you like working with students. That could be because you are still angry about being fired from your teaching job. But it's no reason to take it out on this student. That's how your post comes across. That you're taking out your anger on your situation, on her, because she rejects all of your revision suggestions as opposed to some of it. And, your reaction is to write insulting things about this student which is a totally separate situation.

The only advice I have for you, is to reconsider your line of work and possibly work with adults in a corporate environment instead of a classroom. If you don't like students (K-12, community college), then you should not be in a classroom as a teacher. There's just no point.

I am going to find a website board for professional educators to post on, since many of the people on this board are uneducated, thin-skinned, and over-emotional. Some people on this board need to up their meds and get a college degree. Once you have been been under real pressure like writing a master's thesis or giving a doctoral dissertation defense or or dealing with serious office politics, then being stern with difficult students will not shock you this much.

Later, alligator!

Hey Good Vibrations,

I totally feel your pain. I have been on both sides of this. The thing is, it's probably exactly as you said, the student feels her voice is being lost. Have you expressed to her why you made those edits to her first draft? I find a lot of the time when making edits or suggesting edits, that explaining what you are going for or how you feel it's reading helps the student find their own way to edit it that accomplishes your goal and still maintains your voice.

Having been on the side of the student, I would say that a lot of times I felt like edits from my editor went too far or changed the content, and so I would talk to her about what she was trying to accomplish with her edits and how I felt it changed my intent, and together we came up with solutions that made it stronger for both of us. But if she's not willing to take any direction, I would just make a record that you had made numerous suggestions that she did not take. If she doesn't get into college with that essay, it's her own fault for not taking your advice. But if she's as intelligent as you say, she should be able to understand your POV and how you are trying to help make it stronger.

I don't think you come across as having contempt for your students. You just sound frustrated with this one student because you want her to do well, and she isn't heeding your sage advice. I hope you don't feel like you have to leave this forum because of one person's opinion. There are lots of opinions here on PC and some may or may not be helpful.

Keep your chin up.

Seesaw

Hey good vibrations,

I agree with seesaw. This student may not have understood why you made those edits in this first place. Could you speak with her, and see what she wants to get across with her edits and see if it can be said in a more fleshed out, deeper way?

Back when I was applying for colleges, many years ago, there really wasn't any help with the essays available. One of the main issues I had was knowing what they wanted, in general. I felt like a lot of the seniors in my class didn't know whether they wanted genuine essays, like we would turn in as an assignment, or if they wanted us to promote ourselves. It could be possible that these students think their essays are more of a "job interview" than showing how they write and what they can do and who they are. They may not understand what is really expected from the colleges.

I tutored for awhile, also, and I know it can get frustrating when the students don't seem to "want" the help I'm offering. I had to remind myself that, sometimes, it looked like that because they really just didn't understand or didn't want to admit they were wrong. These days, with younger people being told by the media and their peers that externals matter more than anything else, I tjink it's hard for them to acknowledge needing help, let alone accepting the help that is being offered (or paid for by their parents, I assume).

I'd say give her a chance, try to see why she changed it back and if there is a compromise that the two of you could come to, with the essay, before dropping her as a client.

Hang in there,
Chaos

I would just work with her on what she changed it back to. Maybe it seemed too "not her" to her. I don't think it's a reflection on you or your abilities. Like some others have mentioned, maybe you can come to some middle ground with her.

In the end, if she doesn't get accepted, it's on her, not you. Just keep documentation of your recommendations.