Imposter Syndrome

I found this article in my email this morning, and it precisely describes me! I am a high achiever and a perfectionist, yet I suffer from imposter syndrome, despite my success. Can others relate?

I think this article is very helpful, so I'm pasting it here:

This past week, I finished a three-year Entrepreneurial Masters Program (EMP) alongside 65 incredible classmates from 30 different countries around the world.

Our keynote speaker on the second day had graduated from the program ten years ago and had returned to speak to our class. In her presentation, she shared that during her first year at EMP, she chose to sit in the back of the room because she was intimidated about being there.

A single mom with two kids, she started her jewelry business in 2002 out of her spare bedroom with only $500. During her first year as an EMP student, her business was doing about $2M in revenue, which was near the bottom of what other attendees in the class were generating from their businesses.

When one of the facilitators spoke of the successful entrepreneurs who had gone through this program and the likelihood of someone in the class going on to build a $1B company, she felt even more out of her league.

What she was experiencing is referred to as “Impostor Syndrome,” a psychological phenomenon shared by many high achievers who are convinced they’re inadequate or have a persistent fear of being exposed as a “fraud.” For example, in an interview about winning an Academy Award for “The Accused” in 1988, actress Jody Foster said, “I thought it was a big fluke. I thought everybody would find out, and then they’d take the Oscar back.”

Some psychologists say that Impostor Syndrome is most common in high-achieving women and those who feel different from the majority of their colleagues or underrepresented (people of color, LGBTQ, etc.).

The irony is that Impostor Syndrome tends to impact people who have worked incredibly hard to earn their success, as opposed to those who take the “fake it until they make it” approach or rely on connections or inherited wealth to attain higher rungs. Our keynote speaker was a perfect example of this. A determined, hard-working single mom, she fought through her Impostor Syndrome and realized her entrepreneurial dream.

That speaker’s name? Kendra Scott, founder and CEO of her namesake jewelry company, an enterprise with over 75 stores. Recently, her eponymous company was valued at over $1B as part of its latest investment.

Kendra Scott’s formula for success is largely the result of having grit, a clear vision, resiliency and going against conventional wisdom at every turn.

If, after reading this, you recognize that you’re experiencing Impostor Syndrome in your own life, rest assured that your biggest opportunity may come from leaning into the unconventional path/thinking that got you to where you are today. It’s very likely that you see things a bit differently from those who played it safe, took the predictable route or who benefited most from good luck and timing but chose to give themselves full credit.

Impostor Syndrome can be a strength if you recognize it and you can use those feelings to stay hungry for growth and high achievement, yet remain humble with success. Don’t assume the people around you know more or deserve their position more; they often just have more confidence.

If you act like you belong, soon you will. And humble confidence beats overconfidence almost every time.

Wow, thank you so much for that, Golden_Eve. I just needed to read that this morning. Yes, I totally feel Impostor Syndrome in my life, and very similar to Kendra Scott. I started my own company, it's doing really well, I'm achieving really great things, and I feel like a fake. Although in my life I have recognized the entitled people or the people faking it and have worked really hard to believe I deserve the rewards of my hard work, because as an abuse victim, I was taught that I would never be good enough. So I've overcome a lot of my Impostor Syndrome in dealing with the psychological effects of my past abuse.

Thanks for posting this.

Seesaw

You're very welcome & I'm so glad it helped!! This article really helped me to put it all into perspective and context.

I, too, was abused as kid and never felt good enough as a result. It took years to build my self-esteem up. But I still suffer from constant self-doubt & feelings of inadequacy and yes, imposter syndrome, even though my successes speak to the opposite!

I suppose the message here is to simply have more confidence..... and to trust & believe in oneself, even if you're going in a new or different direction.

And for you, your clients love you and give you very positive feedback. You have a track record of success behind you, but authorities above you have tried to make you doubt yourself and your skills... on top of having an abusive childhood, which just makes it that much harder to feel confident. However, your successes speak for themselves..... you are a shining, bright star! You're rockin' it!!! And I, too, shine in my own career, though I rarely can see or acknowledge it.

Thank you for posting this article. I, for one, am actually pretty low-functioning compared to most adults my age. However, this is because I the first 40 or so years of my life brainwashed into thinking I'm defective. Even functioning normally is a major step up.

Any time I do something that is healthy and independent and productive and contributing, I feel like a big fake. The "real" me should still be holed up in a subsidized apartment, subsisting on disability, barely affording enough food to survive. But no, that's not the "real" me. This is the "real" me, the one who left that life.

For those of us who suffer from mental health issues, it can be so much harder to feel like an effective, functioning adult. The key is to believe in yourself, and to simply do the best that you possibly can. We often measure ourselves against others, but that's a mistake. We are all unique, and every person has their strengths, weaknesses, and issues to contend with. Those of us with mental health issues struggle a bit more than the average person, so it's more of a daily battle we face. But all you can do is your best, and also to believe in yourself that you are productive and functioning at the best level possible for whatever issues you battle and for whatever you have gone through in life.

Very interesting concept. I can’t relate on a personal level as I never felt as an impostor.

But I do understand the feeling from professional stand point. I work with population that tend to downplay themselves and frankly put themselves down.

Pretty much every year I had to explain and convince a group receiving a particular award that it wasn’t a mistake and that is completely earned and I hear a year after year “I think it’s an error, I never did anything worthy an award”. Some of that kind of thinking stems from childhood abuse but some comes from society looking down on people who are even a bit different.

My husband tends to put himself down and he has professional career and two college degrees yet he certainly feels like an impostor (having Tourette’s taught him to hide in a shadow). Not to toot my own horn but he does better since he’s met me because I deal with this at work: building people up and helping them to feel proud despite challenges.

And I have to add it’s not just MI, it’s any kind of difference like physical etc

Excellent topic by the way

Yeah, I mean, I personally have a hard time seeing my own success and feeling confident about myself at work. I am in a field that lends to this strongly though because it's a very challenging field with a lot of questions, few answers, a lot of trial and error and creative experimentation. You can easily second guess yourself in my field.

Anyways, to your point, yes this doesn't have to just be limited to those with any psychological scars or mental health issues.... really, in can apply to anyone who perceives they have some sort of challenge or limitation they must overcome.

Dear Arbie, The last part of your post really encourages me to keep getting better enough to work my way up to getting back with real life. I've been on disability for 7 years (Fibro and Bipolar 1) and fed up with that kind of life. It's lonely not feeling part of the society. I feel "old" even at 49 and I feel like I'm dying. Thank you for writing this...
"The "real" me should still be holed up in a subsidized apartment, subsisting on disability, barely affording enough food to survive. But no, that's not the "real" me. This is the "real" me, the one who left that life."
Congratulations for working your way out of this desperate lifestyle.

Today I started my new job. And I felt the presence of the Imposter Syndrome. I sat in meetings, thinking, yeah I know this, but I have to learn that, and that's new, oh yeah that's familiar, but that's new... and I felt, I can't do this, for but a second. My mind, going immediately to "I can't do that", or "I can't learn that" when I have proven again and again that I CAN.