DXM cough syrup dissociative hallucinagen addiction

addicted to the fantastic escape this drug provides me. drug of choice used to be pot then when i had a psychotic breakdown and quit my job i began to steal from drugstores and DXM became my drug of choice.

the euphoria, the feeling of serenity it gives me is undescribable. it gets better the more i take.

but it also gets worse. hospitalizations, both psychiatric and substance abuse hospitals. breaking my moms heart. avoiding independence and responsibility.

i go to 12 step meetings every day and i was able to scrape together 30 days clean before I picked it back up for a few days, then lasted a week, then picked up, then another week, then relapsed two days ago.

starting to go to yoga and trying to eat healthy. need to become grounded in myself. the addiction is not about drugs its about the psychological disorder or "disease" behind it.

recently ive become focused on this girl who i met in rehab. she still uses alcohol but shes clean off the heroin. shes so cute. i dont know its been a while since ive been in a relationship i wish i could just chill and see her at the friend level. she just left her controlling physically abusive boyfriend and thats a lot of drama and stuff. my sponsor says watch out.

i dont know im clean for today and thats a good thing. just taking it a day at a time. im addicted to the self destructive behavior pattern so its up to me to embrace a healthful lifestyle and turn this thing around. im only 21 and i've got a lot of potential to do great things. if i may say so myself. i think its that im scared i wont live up to my expectations so I chose the easy way out by sabotoging myself.

i'd like to get into social work or psychiatry. i have schizoaffective disorder with past psychosis and dissociative thought patterns. loose associations and grandiose delusions and the like. i'd like to learn what makes these conditions tick and help myself and then help others with similar afflictions.

looking forward to getting in on the chat. this seems like a great community and I like the structured setup. look forward to meeting you all.

What do you think would happen if this girl rejected you, or the two of you are not compatible?

I can relate alot your story, I am also 21 and was addicted to hallucinagenics such as LSD and shrooms + a whole other catogorie of drugs... however I went to rehab for 2 years to over come my addiction and now I have been clean for almost 3 months (not including time in rehab). So Ill be the first to tell you this thing is hard, but it is possible, there is light at the end of the dark tunnel that you are in! I followed the NA 12 steps and the celebrate recovery 12 step programs in center and they are effective if you work them daily... so dont give up and keep going.just some advice dating is not such a good idea at this stage especially not with some one that has just come out of addiction. I have seen many people try it some of them are now back in full fleged addiction and some are dead, so be very carefull. I vowed to myself that I would not date or get involved in any sort of intimate relationship for a year, so that I can get my life in order, so that when the time comes I can actually contribute to a relationship... hope this helps. and stay strong

Wow! I don't know what else to say. I have recently found out that my son has taken dxm and found shrooms in his room growing. It's the 2nd time in 2 months that his father and I have addressed this problem. Before it was alcohol. He was an honor roll student up to graduation a couple of years ago. After 1 year of living on his own, he got into some legal trouble that amazingly enough we were able to pay $$ for a good lawyer and keep him out of jail. He is on probation and screwing up already. He's back home but I have a 10yr old son. I have told him that I can't allow him to live here if he choses to indulge in this behavior. At the time that we confront him, our world is filled with I'm sorry and I'll do betters but a bit of time passes and it's back to the same. I don't want my boyfriend to feel like I'm making him choose between my son and his but.....what do I do? I divorced my ex-husband for drug use and my stepson knows this. I'm a wreck trying to do the right thing and not abandon him at the same time.

Im also addicted to DXM. i love it better than any other drug. The people that matter to me would rather me be addicted to harder drugs just because they dont want people to know that im addicted to cough syrup, like its pathetic or something. its just another drug among many. i have yet to find the mindset that helps me overcome my Social Anxiety Disorder, so until then i guess ill just keep drinking DXM and smoking weed to make me socially functional....

The people that matter? Wow.

i also abuse dxm...honestly i have done everything and quit everything but weed and my occasional bout with 'godjuice' as i called it before i found pills. it freaks my shrink out, but i am bipolar 2 and i have found that when down, at high doses, it's like a temporary manic episode, and at low doses, like 100-200mg it can cure depression, for a time, in like an hour.
i have done this just through total experimentation..trial and error. my shrink is about to send me off to treatment (sorry, i need my bud. harm reduction is the only thing that makes any sense at all..) but far as i'm concerned i am just gonna keep what i have been doing for some years now.
at high doses, it can really mess you up, especially if you BINGE on it..