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#1
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Today is once again 6 months sober for me. I've hit six months several times before - actually it's usually at around 6 or 9 months that I tend to relapse, so I'm being extra careful.
I do feel happy that I've reached 6 months, but i don't quite feel like I've really done it on my own. See since I've been unemployed, I've been voluntarily going into the hospital 3 times a week to take my anatabuse under a nurse's supervision. This makes sure I don't go off it, and so can't drink. I'm doing this because I'm under a lot of stress about job hunting and when left to my own devices I have a lousy track record of going off it and drinking. That being said, I've also been really committed to going to AA meetings and incorporating the women for sobriety program into my life. The last 6 months have been weird. When I got fired from the hospital I delliberately made the decision not to job hunt so I could focus on recovery. That is so not me. And it felt really scary. So I repeated rehab, which was the right decision, did a program on mindfullness meditation which is really helpful and did a CBT group for social phobia. I feel like I've worked really hard on myself. But i'm also scared. I'm close to a couple of jobs so I'm hoping that one of them will come through and i continue to send out resumes. But it's scary - if I don't get a job by the end of Sept. I'll have to take money out of my retirement savings. But I'm trying to take it one day at a time. Thanks everyone here for your support, and I hope to post in 3 months that I'm still sober. splitimage |
#2
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Good for you, splitimage.
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#3
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Good going on your 6 months of sober time.
Quote:
For me, it is my responsibility whether I get and stay sober/clean or not. I need to be aware of all the recovery tools I can in order maintain my commitment to healing. I feel you are being very responsible too by doing what you need to do...there is nothing less about that than any other way people recover, on their own or not.
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Sober Since Aug/29/2022 ⟆⊂ᖇᎯ𝜏⊂ᖺ し∈⟆⟆ ᖘυᖇᖇ ⲙᗝᖇ∈ Jυ⟆𝜏 ᑲ∈⊂Ꭿυ⟆∈ Ⴘᗝυ ɢ𝖮𝜏 🐒𝜏Ꮒ∈ ⲙᗝﬡⲕ∈Ⴘ ᗝ⨍⨍ Ⴘ𝖮υᖇ ᑲᎯ⊂ⲕ ᕍᗝ∈⟆ﬡ'𝜏 ⲙ∈Ꭿﬡ 𝜏ᖺ∈ ⊂⫯ᖇ⊂υ⟆ ᏂᎯ⟆ 𝘭∈⨍𝜏 𝜏ᗝⲱﬡ |
#4
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Congrats, splitimage!!!!
It doesn't matter how many times or how long, all that matters is that it feels right and brings about the right rewards internally. Hang in there, kiddo! |
#5
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so proud of you !!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!
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The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well. anonymous |
#6
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wonderful news, split image! just keep living in today. take care of little things and hand over the rest to your higher power. he/she can produce miracles with things we can't do by ourselves.
i know the job thing is scary but remember, if you were drinking you wouldn't be looking for a job! taking small steps will provide you with success in your recovery and with life challenges.
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand |
#7
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Splitimage, I'm really proud of you. I've never managed six months... my problem is that my family are social drinkers, and when I visit them it seems impossible to say no. I don't seem to be drinking excessively, but it's still not good for me, specially not on meds.
You say you don't feel as though you've done it yourself... of course you have. You've availed yourself of the opportunities out there, and by using those resources you've made it possible to get this far. Keep on keeping on, I'll look out for the good news in three months time. Keep taking that antabuse.
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Here I sit so patiently Waiting to find out what price You have to pay to get out of Going through all these things twice. |
#8
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Quote:
you say that you don't feel like you've done it on your own. that's okay. in fact, it's better than okay. it indicates that maybe you're understanding vital concepts such as humility, honesty, open-mindedness, willingness & unity. it's pointless "doing it on your own" if you never succeed. you're doing a fantastic job of moving beyond your social limitations & phobias by reaching out. it can only keep get better if you keep working this sort of program asking for help and receiving help by putting aside your fear & pride is a great way to cement a solid foundation for recovery. that's the whole point of recovery & AA — the therapeutic value of one alcoholic helping another i've got a couple of 24 hours under the belt now and i still ask fellows in recovery for help when i need it. we all need help sometimes. probably even more than sometimes ![]() this doesn't minimise the value of our recovery; it magnifies it. very, very well done and keep on keeping on!! love & light ![]() ![]()
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![]() “ Those who have a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how.' ” ~V. Frankl ![]() |
#9
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oh, sorry, one other thing…
i've heard it said that if we put anything before our recovery, we may very well lose our recovery along with whatever we put before it so well done on putting recovery before work & job hunting. that must have taken an awful amount of courage!!! but it appears to be paying off ![]()
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![]() “ Those who have a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how.' ” ~V. Frankl ![]() |
#10
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Congrats on 6 mos!!! that is a huge deal.
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You don't have to fly straight... ![]() ...just keep it between the lines!
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