[DespondentDaisy]

So a ouple of people at work smoke weed. And theres this friend of mine who sometimes, at the end of the day, shows me a bit of his little weed stash that e keeps at work. He knows I used to smoke but now it's really tempting me. He showed me it again last night. Now last night and today I had to struggle to not call my hook up and buy weed. It's so annoying! The breakrrom smelled of weed- I swear someone was picking their weed at the table or something. Or it's just his weed smelly asa hell in his locker. I was stuck between wanting to buy weed and treat myself to a lavish dinner. So I ended up eating a huge bureger with fried and a root beer. But It's ok, it's just one day. I just hope I can continue to resist temptation. It's not as easy anymore now that I live on my own because I have no one to answer to, so to speak. But I don't want to smoke becase of all the bad habits I got from it, as well as the harm it did to my lungs and my mind. But just two day in a row of smelling that strong smell is somehow bringing back my addiction full swing-even though by new years it'll be 7 full months without it. It's bqd enough I get to smell cig smoke a couple times blowing in the store throughout the day- yuck! I can't believe I ever used to do that ish. God give me the strength not to call my hook up tonight- or tomorrow while I'm off work. Thanks for any support, I'm feeling really weak right now.

[likewater]

Im really sorry the coworker is tempting you. Can you tell the friend / coworker to knock it off? And do you have anyone you can call or hang out with that doesnt partake in weed?

[DespondentDaisy]

Yes, I have told him. And yes I do have several other people I can hang out with who do not do this. Thankfully. I've so far managed to get engrossed in the community pages tonight, reading and commenting here and there. It's helped. Distraction is my best strength.

[DespondentDaisy]

I'm doing a bit better today. I don't know if it's possible that the smell itself of the potent weed was enough to get my fiending again for it, 'cuz that's what seems to have happened. But I've been through tough detoxes before, so last night's weakness passed quicker than I thought it would. Which is GOOD ; cuz that's not something I want to get involved in again. Too many negative repurcussions like depression and uncontrollable binge eating and reckless late night wandering 'walks' and extreme paranoia and even sometimes losing touch with reality. Keeping that in mind, as helped me abstain so far. And will continue to help me in the future. That and distraction, one of the best tools for me.

[splitimage]

Despondentdaisy,

Good for you for not giving in. Having it be in your face like that at work, would be really hard for anyone to cope with. But it's good that you're remembering the bad consequences - keep focussing on how you do not want to go back there. And remember to just take it one day at a time.

And distractions are awesome.

splitimage

[racee]

i know this is a little late, i can understand, i dont smoke anymore, everyone else in my household smokes sometimes i get where i smell it and i want it but then quickly fades because ughh i hate how i feel 3 hours after i smoke the side effects are just not worth it too me. of course i think about all the energy it gives me and happy state of mind but it doesn't outweigh those side effects. it can be hard to stay away but its even harder to stay away after you give in just once. cause you just ruined your streak so you say why not. if it does more harm then good don't do it. good for them ( the people that smoke) they need it for whatever reasons, and use it like a crutch, great if thats what they need in their life. you can use something else if you need it. i have my fruity gum time! everyone smokes and i chew my fruity gum. same thing as going outside and having a cigarette break. i go outside and have my fruity gum break! may sound stupid but works for me. and when i have really bad craving for something i go get myself a legal stimulant from coffee house or jamba. get something special yeah you might end up spending $ one a fancy coffee but it does cure the craving. it's the "whats the lesser evil"

and for all the adicts out there who are still struggling everyday quit telling yourselves your never going to touch the stuff again. it psychs your mind out and you crave it more just say for right now i'm not going to use maybe later on in the future and when the future comes say it again. and keep putting it off. the more you tell yourself you can't do something the more it wnts to do it. i guess not everyone is that way but the vast majority is. especially if you have been sober for awhile and your still craving high.

[Perna]

I am sorry you are struggling so hard now. I would get out of that job, that environment, if you want to stay clean, get with others who don't smoke and are interested in whatever it is you are working on/for in your life now.

[DespondentDaisy]

Yeah, it's hard to quit cold turkey, I weaned myself off a lot of things.

[DespondentDaisy]

Yes, I am working on doing that, but for now, I still have to work there until I finish my classes and find a better job that suits me. (anyone need an editor in the SF bay area?)