[gabbyslb]

I got DRUNK again Monday. But I don't really know if that is what the issue is. When I started drinking, I was in a fairly good mood and although I have been having a lot of personal and marital problems, I thought I was OK. Just wanted to drink- I drink 'Cause I like to -- I think.
I ended up getting on the phone, like I do so many times when I drink , but I was talking and I noticed there were tears running down my face. It surprized me. I was talking about how right that minute I felt like I wanted to die. But I have no pills left - other than the recent prescriptions. I threw what was left out the last time I took an overdose. I don't think I really wanted to die - I just felt like I wanted to die. Does that make sense?
I read something on this site the other day about alcohol being a depressant. Now I have herd this many times - but the papers on this site really explained it well. I thought I drank to fell better - but I think I drink to not feel.
I have tried AA for about 15 years and have had several periods of sobriety and then recently, I have read about Rational Recovery and I like It better.
But this is not a drinking site -- but I was wondering..... Are there people out there that drink - even thought they are on meds, to self medicate??? I have cut way down lately but am still doing about 2 drunks a week - sometimes only one. I was drinking almost everyday.
Does the Bipolar/Schizo make it harder to not drink? Or does the drinking make the bipolar/schoizo worse???
Drinking does me no good -- the first few are wonderful - but I know before I start that the darkeness will come. Sometimes the voices, sometimes the suicidal actions or at least the thinking. But yet I still do it.
Any thoughts???
Gabby

[RozG]

Hi Gabby

You might get more of a response to this if you post it in the substance and alcohol abuse forum.

Good luck in finding the help you need here.

[Stiv]

Please don't think I'm trying to lecture you because that is not the case.

A few things it's a VERY BAD idea to mix the booze with your meds, they can multiply the effects of one another they can also create whole a whole unique ste of actions in combination.

It's not safe at all. Some of what you described feeling wise sounds like this is in fact the case.

As to the depression and drinking there is an old Phrase:
"I drink because I am depressed, because I drink because I am depressed because.......ad infinitum"

Good luck but try to not mix the substances together, they are powerful enough on thier own.

Best,
Stiv

[splitimage]

I drank for years while taking psych meds, and it certainly didn't help matters. I'm much better now that i've finally gotten sober, even though it's still really hard. From what I've read, and personal experience, if you're dually diagnosed (mental illness and substance abuse) then quitting the drug or alcohol is a little bit harder and you really have to be careful to treat both problems simultaneously. Also if you're self medicating with alcohol, you can be masking symptoms of mental illness - in my case once i got sober, after I'd been sober and really struggling for about 3 months I crashed into the worst depressive episode i've ever experienced and required hospitalization.

At a minimum, you should be honest with your prescribing Dr. about your drinking, otherwise they won't be able to help you.

splitimage

[Stiv]

Split there is no doubt that the usage of substances will mask a whole variety of symptoms/behaviors that are relavent to a mental illness issue though it in and of itself can also be regarded as a symptom too, especially if the user (whether they actually are cognitive of the reasons or motivation) is essentially *self medicating* themselves.

That term self medicating is somewhat a misnomer because while in the begining the usage may feel benificial to the the individual eventually the usage is in no way a measured response to the depression (or whatever the mental state) it actually takes on a life of it's own and more often than not goes out of control and commonly creates a dependancy issue also which makes things worse because now it's another significant manifestation mentally AND physically!

When one mixes the SSRI's and booze it just is so totally counter productive and actually very negative, certaily if the it entails inebreation to boot.

That will really tax the dopamine producing mechanism leaving the person with less available rather than anything even approaching a normal level