[Just_Try]

After talking quickly with my pdoc about what happened on my other thread, I got to thinking about this other thing that happens to me. Luckily, this doesn't happen very often, but I've always contributed this to anxiety. Does that sound right? I don't think it's a panic attack per se. What I know and have seen regarding panic attacks, this doesn't really fit that. See what you guys think. I want to get to the bottom of this too!

Every once in awhile this intense fear floods over me. It's weird because every single time I become convinced I am going to die. Now it's not like a bookcase panic attack where a person will think they are dying of something medical. This is more of an intense fear that some one is going to kill me and I won't live through the night.

The first time, I was a teenager and (for some strange reason) couldn't shake this fear that there was something/someone in my room waiting to kill me. It basically felt like an axe murderer was in the corner waiting for me to fall asleep. Another time, I was painting someone's house (in the middle of the night) when all of a sudden I got this intense fear (again) that I was not going to live through the night. This time it was that the person whose house I was painting, her (soon-to-be) ex-husband was coming over to blow the house up in order to make sure she was left with nothing. Freaked me out so bad that I had to leave and drive across the street to a parking lot to wait for this fear to subside. And most recently (June), this same type of fear again come over me. This time I couldn't shake the feeling that someone was going to break into my apartment that night and (again!) kill me.

These episodes seem to last 15-30 minutes each. Now these don't sound like any kind of panic attack I've ever read about. I just can't imagine that they aren't connected to my anxiety. I don't have a fear of death, so that doesn't seem to be what these are about. What do you guys think? Mainly an anxiety issue, or possibly something more/worse?

I want to get to the bottom of this just like my other thread. Any insight or suggestions would be great!

[ickydog2006]

I had this stuff happen a lot when I first got abused, but it was specific to one person. I was terrified they were going to come find me and get me back for getting them fired. I didn't feel safe anywhere. I don't know why it stopped but it took around 3 years till it stopped...when I had convinced myself it was no big deal. I still have the feeling a lot but it is not as severe and only strikes at certain times...when I feel extremely vulnerable.

[Just_Try]

My feelings would make sense if something tramatic had happened to me, but it hasn't. It's a very natural reaction in those kinds of circumstances. There is no logical reason why it is happening to me. That's what is driving me crazy. It hits me completely out of the blue with no warning at all.

But I'm glad you're not having that feeling as often as you used to. Hopefully, one day you'll completely stop having it....and so will I.

[hereiam]

I used to get the horrible fear that someone was waiting for me to fall asleep in my room when I came home and kill me. I knew it was irrational, I knew it was stupid, and I knew that the possibility of that happening was slim to none. But that never stopped me from checking the closet before I went to bed, and putting a chair on it so I would wake up if someone tried to come out.

Wow...that's the first time I've told anyone that. That sounds paranoid as hell.

Anyway, I don't do it anymore (when I'm sleeping in a room with someone else I don't have this fear whatsoever), but the thing is that sometimes the fear would become so great I wouldn't move. I'd just lay there in my bed, too afraid to do anything. I'd definitely attribute this to anxiety.

So in short, to answer your question: Yup. Seems anxiety related to me. Maybe some GAD in there? Worried about all the 'what ifs' and stuff? I have no idea really, I'm GAD so I thought maybe that would be it, but either way you should get this checked out.

[Just_Try]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
hereiam said:
I used to get the horrible fear that someone was waiting for me to fall asleep in my room when I came home and kill me. I knew it was irrational, I knew it was stupid, and I knew that the possibility of that happening was slim to none. But that never stopped me from checking the closet before I went to bed, and putting a chair on it so I would wake up if someone tried to come out.

Wow...that's the first time I've told anyone that. That sounds paranoid as hell.

Anyway, I don't do it anymore (when I'm sleeping in a room with someone else I don't have this fear whatsoever), but the thing is that sometimes the fear would become so great I wouldn't move. I'd just lay there in my bed, too afraid to do anything. I'd definitely attribute this to anxiety.

So in short, to answer your question: Yup. Seems anxiety related to me. Maybe some GAD in there? Worried about all the 'what ifs' and stuff? I have no idea really, I'm GAD so I thought maybe that would be it, but either way you should get this checked out.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Yup...we are quite a bit the same. How funny! And I do have GAD. These little "terrors" of mine are just too much to the extreme to be GAD. I thought they were connected to the anxiety aspect of GAD, but wasn't too sure. Heck, I thought my other thread was also related to anxiety and I found out today that it really isn't. That's why I wanted to see if anyone else could relate to this issue. It's nice to see that someone else has the exact same irrational fears that I do.

[CedarS]

I've experienced episodes like you describe. My therapist called them "in between PTSD and Panic Attacks". They were not classic panic attacks, but had elements of them, and were definitely PTSD driven.

For me, those intense fear floods are connected to my anxiety challenges. At times they will feel like pure adrenaline rushing through me. I usually don't have the fear of being killed for much longer than a few moments, if at all, unless it is sleep/nightmare connected.

But even a few moments of fearing that I will be harmed or killed is too much, awhile back I went through a cycle where I would suddenly feel a rush of stark fear and terror, and I would be sure for just a few seconds or so that I was about to be harmed violently. I was able to talk myself down each time, I also took them to mean that I needed to pay attention to something. Usually that I was too stressed out and needed to return to basics: sleeping well, good food, water, fun activities, etc.

Sarah

[hereiam]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Just_Try said:
Yup...we are quite a bit the same. How funny! And I do have GAD. These little "terrors" of mine are just too much to the extreme to be GAD. I thought they were connected to the anxiety aspect of GAD, but wasn't too sure. Heck, I thought my other thread was also related to anxiety and I found out today that it really isn't. That's why I wanted to see if anyone else could relate to this issue. It's nice to see that someone else has the exact same irrational fears that I do.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Heh, I hear you on that. But now that I live at college with roommates, I don't fear that whatsoever. But at home, I would never have my bed under a window for fear that someone would break in. I'd always have my bed against the wall, so I could lay at an angle that allowed me to see the whole room. For a while I was scared something/someone was under my bed...

I know! It all sounds so childish. But I can't help myself. I'll probably do the same things when I go back home. They aren't even a really big deal for me anymore, it's just part of the routine. Oh well.

Do you have a T? Why don't you ask them about it if you do?