[Tsuki632]

I'm not sure where to post this. . . anxiety is my most active diagnosis right now, so I chose here.

There is a lot going on in my life right now, most of it good. The problem is that I feel completely overwhelmed by all of it that I'm paralyzed because I'm afraid of screwing up. (I have a teeny problem with perfectionism).

I bought my first house a few months ago. Moved in with a guy for the first time at the same time. (We bought the house together) Became a step-mom part-time (I don't have kids of my own, so instant 10 year old is a bit of a shock) I've developed some weird joint pain that's freaking me out and have to go for an arthritis assessment (I'm only 36) My mom is on her 3rd bout with breast cancer and it's fallout. I can't have intercourse due to dysparunia which requires very invasive physiotherapy. My debt is going up instead of down which is a first for me. I feel like my finances are out of control and my bf and I will end up on "Til Debt do us Part" getting called out by Gail Vaz Oxlade. I'm stressing out about money and my bf keeps spending more. (We have differing ideas of want and need. So I feel like the bad guy all the time. They're looking to cut hours at my job. . .again. My beautiful new house is a disaster because I can't find a place to put stuff I just move it around. There's usually one somewhat clean room at any given time so it feels futile because the whole thing is never clean.

I'm at the point that I'm so overwhelmed, I don't know what to do first so I sit on my butt and watch bad TV feeling guilty and getting down on myself.

Thanks for letting me vent, I had to get some of that out of my head.

[kaliope]

I can understand you feeling overwhelmed with all the different things going on in your life. Investing in a home is a big deal and then to have your hours cut makes paying for that home a bit scary. On top of a new home, you've become a mother, very stressful indeed. Then yours and your mothers medical issues to worry about, it is a great strength of yours that you started off your post saying that most of your life is good. Keep up the good work and positive outlook. take care

[Mustkeepjob32]

In many areas of your life, you're dealing with very big anxiety-producing issues. Hopefully you are seeing a therapist or someone like that because it seems like too much.

[Tsuki632]

I see my T every 4-6 weeks. I'm lucky in that I have a great support network. Sometimes I need to get stuff out of my head. Talking jumbles things more sometimes. It's great to have this forum. People who understand because it doesn't matter how educated or well-intentioned people are, if they don't have first hand experience with anxiety they don't really get it. Plus I don't worry about burdening people here which makes it easier to let it out.

Thanks for the kind words.

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