Dealing with unnecessary anxiety

I get WAY TOO excited when going to doctors-what can I do about it? have done this all my life and it makes others anxious.

HELP-REALLY WANT TO CHANGE!

Tell us more. What is way too excited for you? What happens? What do you feel? What do you think/worry about?

Tell us a litle more about what it is like for you when you have to go to doctors.

ECHOES

Go to your doctor just for checkups or to chat a few times and get to know the people in the office better? Desensitize yourself somewhat. I think everyone finds unknown situations stessful so figure out how to make them a bit more comfortable for you and they might be less exciting.

Hi,

Can you do things to make the experience less scary and more personal?

Have you ever tried going to a small office as opposed to someone who works in a huge group practice? I think that those drop in/urgent care doctor's offices where you don't need an appointment are never a good idea because you may not see the same person every time and they can only spend a few minutes with each patient...

You could also get a recommendation from a friend or family member for a doctor...

Do you work better with someone of the same gender?

I'm talking about the fact that someone's giving me undivided attention when I'm sure I'm just another name to them.

Could this be considered "anticipatory anxiety?"

AC
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
ECHOES said:
Tell us more. What is way too excited for you? What happens? What do you feel? What do you think/worry about?

Tell us a litle more about what it is like for you when you have to go to doctors.

ECHOES


</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

I'm not talking about a pdoc-this was a dermatologist! My pdoc will be retiring at the end of the year and I'll be getting a woman to take his place! First time! My therapist is male and we have a wonderful working relationship-I've been seeing him for 3 years this month!

ac

Maybe I'm not reading this right, so the only place you get unnecessary anxiety is at your Dermatologists office and no where else?

Dont know what to say about that? Change Dermatologists?

Not being a smart you know what, but if you can go to all your other doc's just fine and out in public to places maybe there is just something about that place that triggers you.

This would be something very interesting to talk to your therapist about. It sounds like you are very uncomfortable being "seen" in a general sense. There could be a lot of reasons and thoughts you have about something like that.

There are tricks you can do to get through it in the meantime. I will sometimes remind myself that in an hour or 2 or 24 or whatever, it will be over and I will be doing (whatever) then.

Another thing you can do is to prepare a little-- but don't overdo it. Write down what you want to say and the questions you want answered. Going prepared can feel good.

What do you do to help ease your anxiety in other situations?

ECHOES

Not just docs but any "big event"-vacation, etc. the thermostat gets WAY TOO HOT!

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Taipans said:
Maybe I'm not reading this right, so the only place you get unnecessary anxiety is at your Dermatologists office and no where else?

Dont know what to say about that? Change Dermatologists?

Not being a smart you know what, but if you can go to all your other doc's just fine and out in public to places maybe there is just something about that place that triggers you.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Hello I hope things get better for you soon. Your therapist can help you to get over some of the anxiety you are having if the Dr office is a trigger. Perhaps the office is too big for you to feel safe, and you need to get some help from your therapist in being comfortable in big places, and deal with why you are feeling so overwhelmed seeing the Dermatologist. Perhaps you feel like a number and you are not getting the appropriate treatment you deserve, due to feeling neglected in some way from the Dr. I am sure the Dr is doing the best he can do for your medical treatment and the Dr is there to treat you in the best manner possible, and not have relationships with his patients. Perhaps your insight on the situation is a little distorted since you feel that you should have a close relationship with your Dermatologist like you do with yout therapist, and this is causing some confusion in your boundaries with the dermatologist, and you feel neglected by his professionalism and you take this as a lack of concern for your health, in general, since your dermatologist treats you differently that your counselor. I think you are having problems because you relly feel that the dermatologist is not caring enough and you it triggers you in some manner to go there, because of the resentment you feel that the dermotologist is not giving you enough attention, that you feel you deserve as his patient. I will tell you something most Drs go through their day doing the same thing so much they lose their ability to communicate in a manner that is correct and they just fix things, and ailments. Unfortunately we would all like to have Drs that treat us more reasonably and humanely, but it doesnt always happen that way. I am sorry that you are hurt, but you are not alone in feeling this way. I just hope you talk to your therapist and learn to deal with this in a more positive manner for yourself. Take care I hope the best for you in the future Sincerely Soidhonia

Ok I get where your coming from now, sorry about that. Was blaming your poor dermatologist! lol

Soidhonia,

It's about more than just docs; it's anything big going on-not xmas or bdays but stuff where I seek attention but getting unnecessarily anxious/excited.

ac

I try to relax into undivided attention and treat doctors and others like I treat my therapist? I hate going to get my hair cut because I get anxious but I twisted my emphasis a bit and "felt" my hair getting washed, my head being massaged and thought of myself as "lucky" and thankful to be getting the attention? Look at what you are getting and how you relate to it rather than what/that the other person is giving it to you. Just "accept" that it is coming your way and instead of how you feel about that, figure out where to put it :-) Pretend you're pulling in a rope on a sailboat and have to coil it neatly behind you; focus on the coiling rather than the speed at which it's coming in and whether or not you will be able to deal with it. I don't like driving "down" from the top of high bridges with the other cars coming at me, etc. I complained once and fortunately I said, "I'm going too fast, it's hard to steer!" and my husband replied, "Then slow down." Because I was focused on keeping up my speed and not bothering the people behind me, I was having problems. To heck with the other people, look at yourself and how you are doing/feeling. Focus on your dermatologist touching your face/skin, focus on "touch" and how it feels in a sensual way (play games like comparing how the dermatologist touching you feels versus how you touching another person feels -- being touched versus touching) instead of focusing on the psychological, "this person is paying attention to me" excitement.