Fear of losing my job, before even starting

Decided to put this under anxiety because as of right now this is mainly what I'm dealing with. Long story short, I went out last night, got pepper sprayed, and my phone was stolen ( in front of the cops). Im upset over my phone being stolen and fear that I may have accidentally called my boss of my new job. Only reason why I have this fear because it happened by accident earlier that day at work. I feel like either a cop, or an employee at the club stole my phone thinking that I had something incriminating on it. There was no reason for me to be sprayed as aggressively as I was.

However, at the end of the day I'm more concerned about my new job finding out about this. I'm NOT A CRIMINAL! Ive never had anything like this happen to me in life! I should of just listened to my gut. Ihad bad vibes about going there since I purchased my ticket. I hope I didnt just ruin my life. I'm a good employee, I dont deserve this. Ive been drinking vodka straight all day trying to cope because I ran out of my Xanax. I just don't want to lose my job. I'm not that person. I'm a good person. If I did anything to deserve that treatment I would apologize for my actions, but I did NOTHING bad enough to be treated like that!

I don't know if you take xanax everyday on a consistent basis or if it is just prn. One thing you really never want to happen is to suddenly just stop taking a benzo. like xanax. Your drinking the Vodka is probably reducing the side effects of the sudden stop of the xanax. It hits some of the same receptor sites So it dose take some of the side effects away including getting you drunk. You should try to get a refill on the xanax. Stopping it cold turkey will make you more anxious, worried, paranoid etc.

I realize you put this thread on here 2 days ago. So, I don't know if you have talked to your boss and have called about your phone. I hope you get it all sorted out and get or got a script for your med.

I only take the Xanax when needed. I use to take it everyday but I realized I was taking for the wrong reason . I ended up going to the hospital for Chest Pains yesterday morning and they put me on Ativan. Will be going to my Dr soon to refill my Xanax because I can't do any but sleep on Atuvan.

As for my job. They got in contact with me via email to confirm my start date which was a relief. As for my phone I filed a claim with my insurance and my new one should be here soon.

Its just the embarrassment of the night just lingers with me. I dont want to go out anymore, or show my face. I just stay home and in bed. If it wasnt for work I'd lay in bed forever.

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We all make poor decisions sometimes but it worked out well for you in the end. Think of the positives of all that mess being sorted out and you can move on. I am happy for you! : ) Pun partially intended- screen name!

Thank you! I really need to focus on the positives. My phone came today so I feel like I have a piece of me back lol

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