[tiodlliwi]

I will have thought of it.

I wish that I could stop thinking in worst-case scenerio terms. In almost all aspects of my life, I am happy and satisfied but that doesn't stop me from thinking that the worst is going to happen. No one very close to me has ever died so I often think about loved ones dying and how I will handle that. Although my husband deeply loves me and we are on the upswing of some tough times, I feel paralyzed by the fear of him someday just taking off. This fear often gets so severe that I am afraid to have children because I don't want to be left alone as a single parent. The things in life I can't control scare the crap out of me- and, really what can we control?

Stick with me while I tell you a story about my weekend. Our computer was totally virused/spywared out and wouldn't even function on Saturday. So I call around and find a place that said they could probably fix it that day. I bring it in, drop it off (it is not really a regular office, but one on the second floor of a run-down building with just one guy there, but it was a Saturday...) Anyways, he says the scan will take 2-4 hours. 5-6 hours go by and Saturday night I am just freaking out. I give a call, no answer. By later that night, after no phone call, I am convinced that I have been taken for a ride, am calling the emergency number on the voice mail, leaving urgent messages. I was certain this guy was getting credit card info from the computer or just stealing the darn thing! Sunday was worse, and didn't hear anything until today. Maybe a "rational" person would think that it took longer than he thought, didn't work on Sundays, etc. But me, no, any bad thought about the situation I could think of, I thought it.

Please give any suggestions as to how to calm these sorts of fears. I would rather not go back on meds as many of you know, but I also start to feel "crazy" sometimes. My husband, who lets mostly everything roll off his back, does not understand and has a difficult time watching me not be able to "calm down".

Help! Anyone?

[sabby]

It sure must be tough getting through those times. I'm so sorry you are having this difficulty.

Would it help you if you wrote down your "worst case scenario" and then write down other scenarios that could be happening? Sometimes seeing it on paper...just writing it out will help to calm you by realizing that there are other possible reasons for the way something is happening? You know, sort of a pros and cons type of list?

I have a tendancy to think the worst too, but I've learned over the years that when I do that, I can prepare myself for the worst while thinking about and hoping for the best. By preparing for the worst, I'm not in a situation that will take me by surprise and I find I can deal better with it. But I've also found that 99% of the time, the worst does not happen. So I've waisted precious energy and anxiety on something that didn't even come to light.

I wish for you some peace and relaxation from your troubled thoughts....

Hugssssss
J

[ickydog2006]

I'm not saying that this is your only option but I just went back on meds after a year of being off and have found it amazingly helpful. My anxiety and OCD were getting out of hand again and I'm glad my doc and T advised me to start meds. It feels like I'm starting to have my life back again. Everything is not perfect and I'm going through some rough times at this moment but I don't know what I'd do without meds.

I hope things improve for you and I wish I could help but I couldn't get over those things without meds. I hope you have better luck... many people do.

((((((((((hugs))))))))))

[SeptemberMorn]

Have you tried Cognitive Behavioral Therapy? There's a sticky in Psychoterapy that you can take a look at. There are people that conquer their anxiety with thoughts and actions, but I'm sure not one of them! I need to be on meds. It's much, much easier and thorough!

It sounds like these thoughts are controlling your life. Time to do something about it, I would think.

Good luck!