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#1
Jul 25, 2015, 09:52 AM
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Hi,
Is it a bipolar thing or something regarding phobia/anxiety? I have suffered all my life with disliking touch. I don't like hugging as it feels awkward and uncomfortable. I can't hold hands with people or shake their hands as I end up having sweaty hands which makes me even more paranoid. I don't like people touching me like putting their hand on my shoulder etc. I can't handle people standing close to me..... I am in drama therapy and we had to do an activity where we had to walk towards someone and when we found the right place we had to say stop. I was paired with this guy who was really okay with it but I wasn't it was do awkward. I know there are times where hugging is needed or acceptable (Birthdays, Celebrations, Christmas, New Year etc) and I know what friends like hugging so I have to just suck it up and deal with it.... but I'm getting frustrated that I can't cope with this. I struggle to hug my family (can't even hug my Twin without feeling embarrassed and awkward) Any tips/ideas on how to be socially accepted and anyone have an idea why I'm like this? Sent from my GT-I9195 using Tapatalk |
 Anonymous200325, gayleggg
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#2
Jul 25, 2015, 10:37 AM
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I don't believe it is a bipolar thing, more anxiety related. I'm not completely comfortable with it but it depends on who it is and in the last ten years I have tried to become more comfortable with it as my ailing mother felt the need for a hug when I would visit. I've learned that they can be very good for showing and getting support.
I found it took practice for me to become comfortable with hugging, but it was worth it.
__________________
Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha  |
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#3
Jul 25, 2015, 06:12 PM
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How do I start to accept touch/hugging etc? Yes time and patience but us there any techniques that worked for you?
Sent from my GT-I9195 using Tapatalk |
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#4
Jul 26, 2015, 06:55 PM
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I am the same way, i hate it when someone touches me, or attempts to hug me. As for the question, i do believe that it is more so related to anxiety/phobia rather than bipolar.
~  MissLabarinth
__________________
There are many types of monsters that scare me: Monsters who cause trouble without showing themselves, monsters who abduct children, monsters who devour dreams, monsters who suck blood... and then, monsters who tell nothing but lies. Lying monsters are a real nuisance: They are much more cunning than others. They pose as humans even though they have no understanding of the human heart; they eat even though they've never experienced hunger; they study even though they have no interest in academics; they seek friendship even though they do not know how to love. If I were to encounter such monsters, I would likely be eaten by them... because in truth, I am that monster.
-L (Death Note, Tsugumi Obha) |
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#5
Jul 26, 2015, 06:57 PM
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I have this problem although there are a few very close relatives I can hug anyone else, even a friend makes me feel awkward or uncomfortable also. If someone is coming in for a hug or I know they like to hug I tell them right off the bat that I don't do hugs.
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#6
Jul 28, 2015, 06:10 AM
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It's so frustrating as I would love to be so open and huggy.... but I get that weird feeling when someone springs it on me.
Sent from my GT-I9195 using Tapatalk |
| XenaStrikes
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#7
Jul 28, 2015, 06:32 AM
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IDK Miss Laura....Did something happen to you when you were younger? Do you feel you don't deserve to be hugged? Are any of your insecurities stopping you? What does your Therapist say?
Wishing you luck with this and the best of health. |
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#8
Jul 28, 2015, 09:37 AM
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Hey XenaStrikes,
No nothing happened to me when I was a kid. It hasn't came up in therapy as I am I'm a group and I don't want to bring it up also there is not much time to sit and chat about us individually. There are 10 in my group and we are in for an hour and a half. I use to say that yo my friends that I don't deserve a hug/their friendship/their time but that was when I was really ill. I'm stablish lol! Sent from my GT-I9195 using Tapatalk |
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#9
Jul 30, 2015, 01:53 AM
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Thank you for replying Miss Laura
 I am glad that you are "stablish"...love your word usage. OK, so you are stablish but I still suspect some low self esteem issues going on. Do you have any pets? Dog? Cat? Do you like to pet animals? Hug them perhaps? Animals love to be touched, gives them a feeling of being loved although they do not know the word they know it comforts them. Group? If I were you I would bring it up, after all you are there to get help. How can anyone help if you don't tell them what is wrong? Here is a hug for you (((((((( Miss Laura ))))))))) You are very sweet. I wish you the best. 
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#10
Jul 30, 2015, 05:16 PM
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Hey XenaStrikes,
I don't own any pets (afraid if dogs and my parents don't like cats.... I would never see them). I really struggle to talk about what's really going on with me in therapy as I'm scared I'm wrong or other people think I'm nuts. I have things going on but today in therapy when asked how I was I said "I'm fine" ...... This is me being me annoying or what Sent from my GT-I9195 using Tapatalk |
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#11
Jul 30, 2015, 10:56 PM
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Hello Laura,
Don't be afraid of being right or wrong...you forget that the other people in there with you have their own suitcase full of stuff and they might be thinking the same things about themselves. Everybody has something Miss Laura, not just you, so you are not alone in that regard. If group is too difficult for you perhaps having a one on one discourse with a Therapist would be more conducive for you. I personally prefer a one on one myself. You know, not all people liked to be touched but if you saw someone huddled in a corner on the floor crying would you be compelled to go over and try to comfort that person? I myself do not like to be touched by people I don't know. Come to think of it I myself don't like sitting in a room full of strangers telling them all my personal stuff. For me the one on one is so much more productive. Respectfully, Xena |
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#12
Jul 31, 2015, 01:43 AM
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Quote:
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#13
Jul 31, 2015, 01:05 PM
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I have been feeling really angry over recent days but I "can't" tell the group.... I don't want to just tell them as they will think I am someone different. I am seeing my Nurse next week and I think I am gonna ask him some of the questions I have. I only get 30 mins with him and we have to cram in a whole month into that appointment... grrr!!
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