[love2424]

Hello all,
I'm wondering if it is possible to have ptsd, or something similar from the situation I am in. A little background: I've been married for 4 years now and have 2 children with my husband. He has a daughter by someone else he was previously with. This woman had made my life a living hell for years. She has relentlessly harassed me, threatened me, has shown up on my doorstep at 1 in the morning pounding on my door and threatening myself and my kids to the point where I had to call 911 because she would not leave and I was afraid she was going to bust my door down. That has happened twice. About a year and a half ago, I found out my husband had been having an affair with her the entire time we were together. To make things worse, I was 7 months pregnant when I found this out. It was absolutely hands down the worst, lowest, darkest point in my life. Just typing this out has my heart rate up and my eyes tearing up. I was torn on what to do, and have not told anyone about this, because I know if I did no one would understand why I decided to stay with my husband. Since then, he has cut all unnecessary communication with her and solely communicates with her for things having to do with their 10 year old daughter. He is open with me and allows me to access his phone and anything else and I do believe with all my heart he has remained faithful to me since then and will continue to do so. The problem is that whenever I think of it, or she comes up (she is the mother of my step daughter so she will be in my life forever) my heart races, I get the shakes, uncontrollable twitching and severe anxiety to the point that when I finally am able to calm down I feel exhausted and drained. She has used the fact that he cheated on me to emotionally torture me, I've blocked her on social media, but she has gone so far as to make a fake profile to send me messages explaining in explicit detail what my husband and her have done while I wasn't home. What I've typed doesn't even cover half of what I have gone through with her, and might sound like nothing compared to what some people have been through and I understand that. But I know I have some kind of anxiety disorder and I can't afford to see a counselor or doctor at this point. I was just wondering if anyone has any advice or input. Thanks in advance

[Writer82]

This could be Generalize Anxiety Disorder, telling from what you described. Here is the criteria directly from the DSM-5 itself. (I have student access.)

Generalized Anxiety Disorder
Diagnostic Criteria
300.02 (F41.1)

The problem is that whenever I think of it, or she comes up ... my heart races, I get the shakes, uncontrollable twitching and severe anxiety to the point that when I finally am able to calm down I feel exhausted and drained.

A. Excessive anxiety and worry (apprehensive expectation), occurring more days than not for at least 6 months, about a number of events or activities (such as work or school performance).
B. The individual finds it difficult to control the worry.

Do any of these sound like you?

C. The anxiety and worry are associated with three (or more) of the following six symptoms (with at least some symptoms having been present for more days than not for the past 6 months):
o Note: Only one item is required in children.
1. Restlessness or feeling keyed up or on edge.
2. Being easily fatigued.
3. Difficulty concentrating or mind going blank.
4. Irritability.
5. Muscle tension.
6. Sleep disturbance (difficulty falling or staying asleep, or restless, unsatisfying sleep).

B. The anxiety, worry, or physical symptoms cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning.
C. The disturbance is not attributable to the physiological effects of a substance (e.g., a drug of abuse, a medication) or another medical condition (e.g., hyperthyroidism).
D. The disturbance is not better explained by another mental disorder (e.g., anxiety or worry about having panic attacks in panic disorder, negative evaluation in social anxiety disorder [social phobia], contamination or other obsessions in obsessive-compulsive disorder, separation from attachment figures in separation anxiety disorder, reminders of traumatic events in posttraumatic stress disorder, gaining weight in anorexia nervosa, physical complaints in somatic symptom disorder, perceived appearance flaws in body dysmorphic disorder, having a serious illness in illness anxiety disorder, or the content of delusional beliefs in schizophrenia or delusional disorder).

[Writer82]

(Cont.)

Without knowing more, it is difficult to tell if this is PTSD, but given the events which normally onset this disorder, such as traumatic life events, as well as symptoms which are unique to PTSD itself, it is unlikely. I am not downplaying your problem in the least; however, knowing more about what you are dealing with is key here. Especially if you cannot afford therapy. You came to the right place for in lieu of that.

Generalized Anxiety Disorder can be difficult to live with on its own, and Anxiety itself plays a huge role with those who do suffer PTSD. So, if in fact you are suffering PTSD, the Anxiety is the key thing you need to deal with.

Cyber-bullying, and social media can exasperate your anxiety, and this woman doing this to you is in no way helping. It might be hard, but get off social media for a while. Clean out your friends list when you are ready to return, and I have seen some people change their name. You can also make it near impossible to be found. Up your Facebook profile security settings. Be very mindful of who you reply to, and who you add to Facebook. This will help you get away from this woman (who is clearly jealous and unstable).

Also, do your best to get a good nights sleep. I actually did a report for my Biopsychology class on how sleep deprivation can make mental disorders worse. Getting a good nights sleep is key to dealing with your anxiety for several reasons. If you would like, the link to my report is posted below for you to look through.

I tell everyone this who talks about dealing with any kind of mental disorder, even if you don't, it's still a good idea. Start a journal. This will help you get a clear idea of what triggers it and when. By looking at it this way, you will get a better idea on how to deal with it. Also, when you are finally able to get to a therapist, this will help both of you develop a treatment plan. I find when I write in my journal, my thoughts slow down and my anxiety feels less overwhelming.

Lastly, I recommend this because I do it and it works. Essential oils. Keep some relaxing scents near you so when you get keyed up, you can use the scent to relax. I'm telling you, it works! I deal with anxiety myself, and I've spent a lot of time studying ways to deal with it myself.

I strongly recommend you get to a therapist as soon as you are able, even if it's only one visit to vent and get things off your chest. Here is the link to the paper on sleep deprivation. I hope you've found this helpful.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1...it?usp=sharing

Sorry for the really long post.