[MountainGirl]

I know that I am new here, and that no one here knows a lot about me. Please let me start by telling you that I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I am a checker and a counter. At night, my biggest problem is that I am convinced that my house is not safe enough and that someone will break in and harm me or kill me.

My husband works at night, so he is not home Monday through Friday nights, and sometimes on Saturday. I used to only worry about it when he wasn't home, but now I obsess over it even when he is home.

Between the hours of 9:23pm and 4 am I cannot sleep because this is the time that I feel that I am most at risk for a break in. We live in a rather small town, and right across the street from the Chief of Police and another police officer (they live side by side), so I should feel that I am at the safest place that I can be, but I do not.

I'm so terrified that I will lay in bed awake literally for hours and obsess to the point that I make myself sick if I do not get up and get onto the computer or read a book or clean something. I don't see the doctor again until August 10, so I am not really sure what to do...

[lavendersteph]

oh sweetness it's ok i hear ya i 'm going throught the same right now i will alwaysbe on chat around midnight if u ever want to caht i don't sleep at all at night i sleep around 5.am or so so if u feel bad jsut go to chat there are so many kind ppl there to help

steph

Mountaingirl, I'm so sorry!! I had the same exact problem you have (I also have OCD). My husband was overseas for a looong time, and I was terrified to be home alone at night. I would check everything, all night long, even places no one could possibly fit!! I even slept in my car one night, I was that terrified!

Well, I guess I'm not one to give advice here, since I do the same thing. Everyone telling you you're safe doesn't help, because it's your OCD doing this to you, not reality. Only thing that helps me now, when he's gone, is taking seroquel at night-totally knocks me out. I have a very long prayer I go through at night, and before I finish it I'm asleep. Oh, and having cable tv-avoiding the court tv shows like the plague!! Only happy things hours before bedtime.

Tokidoki

[MountainGirl]

Thank you both for your replies. I am supposed to take one Ambien CR, two 150mg trazodone and 2mg Risperdal at bedtime to make me sleep, but I cannot bring myself to take them, because I am afraid that something bad will happen and I won't wake up because of the sleeping meds. Ughhhh!! I really am tortured right now.

My hubby and I are going to pick out another lock for the bedroom door in the hopes of making me feel more secure, but I don't know how well it will work. I so need help.

[lavendersteph]

if the meds scare you then its best not to take them my advice to u is get a dog i did and it helped big time my grandma has a rott pit mix dog named pepper and i borrowed her when my parents went on vaca she is so big and scary looking it made me feel so comfortable and safe i know how u feel i felt the same as well this yr right now this sec my parents are on vaca again and this time i have to 2 shih tzus my own dogs they keep me company all the time so i feel ok plus my sister is here she goes out alot but just knowing she will be home later makes me feel ok but the dogs help me big time
love steph

[lovetolaugh]

Hi,
I just wanted to say I am sorry for what you are going through. I too can have times I obsess and worry I will die etc. and it is no fun. Did you know that the biggest time for break-ins is between 8am and 5pm?? True statistic...most burglars assume people are at work and so they break in at that time. Have you thought of putting an alarm system in? You can even buy window and door alarms cheap at the hardware store....maybe that would help you to feel safe. Try to put positive thoughts in...and maybe re-word your thinking. I know it is HARD....I struggle myself but I find the more positive calm thoughts I can put in the better I feel. I too am terrified of pills and have had many sleepless nights. I have to get a medical procedure done soon and I am terrified I will die!! What minds we have. Let us both know the odds are in our favor that we will be ok. If only we can find a way to make that thought stick!! Good luck to you.