[vintagexsoul]

Aside from loving the song Losing My Religion, over the course of a year I've lost my spiritual center. That song haunts me. Because it describes me precisely. I'm anxious about being spiritual, because in the past I had religious and spiritual delusions due to my psychotic symptoms. What are the risks of that happening again? I've been pagan most of my adult life. I'm trying to simply celebrate the changing of the seasons, to try and develop a spiritual center again. I want to believe in a deity (or several) but I'm nervous about praying and believing I'm hearing responses which could be voices or imagined.

I feel like spirituality, whatever it may be, is really important for the soul and mind. And I want to be spiritual again. I'm just scared. Does anyone else experience this or have advice to give?

[alchemy63]

Taking the history you've described, and not wanting to freak you out further, or cause undue fear, it sounds intelligent and perceptive to recognize and caution yourself over false understanding.

I have this simple advice. For me, what I do, is, create within your center the purest idea of love and kindness you are capable. See to it that this love and kindness contains no selfish or egotistical motives. Inquire of this feeling what it's true aim is. If it is able to answer you that it has at its center the intention of good health and no harm to yourself or others, that can be a beginning place for that seed of understanding to grow. A continuous monitoring of that spirits motives, checked against your own most altruistic beliefs helps to keep that spirit in its purest form.

[yagr]

Well said alchemy63. Another way I have heard it said is like this:

"But whatsoever, after due examination and analysis, you find to be conducive to the good, the benefit, the welfare of all beings, that doctrine believe and cling to, and take it as your guide.”

[vintagexsoul]

My beliefs never harmed anyone, nor was I ever instructed to harm anyone. Nor myself. It was more along New Age lines of belief that tend to be way out there. I jumped on a few fads.

But this is lovely advice, and I truly appreciate it. And will take it to heart.