[nervousnellie]

It is 5:00 am and I cannot sleep because I am going to a pampered chef party over my neighbors house tonight and am extremely nervous. I have only lived in this neighborhood a year and a half, and have only met her once. I want to go, she seems really nice, and I think it will be a great way to get friendlier with her and my other neighbors. But is this really going to bother me all day??

I used to take Xanax for times like these, but became addicted to it in the last year....(I relied on it much too much...) so I can no longer take it.

Is this social anxiety? Seems to be. I HATE IT. I understand about people being nervous, but do most people let it consume their day? Its a stupid party....not a job interview.....

Well, I am going to try to sleep for an hour before I have to get up and go to work..though I know that won't happen. Thanks for letting me vent.
Have a good day all!!



"This too shall pass"

I totally understand! I have a difficult time with social situations. One thing that helps is to give yourself the role of host at parties. Trie to make others feel comfortable and assume t hat they are all new and you are an old friend. Ask lots of questions and once you meet people introduce them to others.

Now. I do know that doesnt always cure everything but it can help lessen the anxiety. Also, be sure you know your an awesome person!

[darkeyes]

It sounds like social anxiety, I have had opportunities for new friendships but sort of "chickened out", I explained this to my pdoc and he said it sounds like it and if I fear others will think I am being snobby (which I fear) he suggested to tell a little white lie telling them" I'd love to but I have a previous engament, but would like to take a rain check".
He didn't give me the Klonopin for that but for panic attacks I have started to occasionally get since last spring, never knew what they where like, never had one, but after I did and coincidencly had an appt with him, I told him what happened and how horrible the sensation was, so he prescribed it "as needed".
If you wish not to use the meds. can you try talking to a therapist for help with this?
I hope you lots of luck with this, and welcome you to the forums.

Please take care now,

DE

In giving advice seek to help, not please your friend
SOLON

[mj14]

Is this social anxiety? Seems to be. I HATE IT. I understand about people being nervous, but do most people let it consume their day? Its a stupid party....not a job interview.....

nervousnellie, letting things like this consume our day is exactly what social anxiety does. I was nervous for days before my friend's 40th birthday party, and actually ended up making myself sick. In that case, the anxiety won, because I was too sick to drive to the party, and missed it. So, try not to beat yourself up about being nervous...it's not *just* a party...it's a situation that you are having difficulty coping with, and that's ok.

I heard recently on the radio a little piece about using cognitive behavioral therapy to combat social anxiety. I wish I could remember everything they said, but I know some of it focused on actually going into social situations, and then being conscious of the fact that nothing horrible happened. So after this party, you may want to think of everything positive that came of the evening, and maybe even write them down, to look at next time you are struggling with the same thing.

By the way, ozzie...that's a great idea! I'm going to have to try that myself.

mj

<font color=green> If she spins fast enough then maybe the broken pieces of her heart will stay together, but even a gyroscope can't spin forever</font color=green>