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#1
Sep 12, 2018, 04:54 PM
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Hey everyone. I'm Ashlee.
I am 26 years old and experience severe GAD. I don't know what to say, I feel like I'm posting something that is pointless but I will start by saying I am taking Fluoxetine 20mg and I feel like I need to talk to my Dr about a higher dose because it works for minor triggers but for the big triggers does nothing. Today I experienced severe anxiety and ended up having to leave work and I am now even more anxious because I'm afraid I'll lose my job but, I literally threw up because of my anxiety and I just had to go home after that. I'm supposed to be seeing a therapist this Friday but I have no money to do so and due to no insurance I'm afraid of telling my Dr I cancelled my appointment because I don't want him to think I'm not trying but, I really am trying. I'm looking for online therapy and checked out Betterhelp but I can't afford that. I'm broke as crap and I think it's really unfair that people such as myself and many others who have mental illnesses can't get the help we need due to finances. Why can't some of this just be offered? I don't get it! Along with GAD I also have a bad eating disorder (anorexia) I am terrified of food and have an obsession with eating nothing but fruit/veggies and few carbs and I have to constantly check my weight and check my stomach in the mirror (literally several times a day) I try and eat things that are high in fiber such as bananas so I go to the BR after eating and pass it through my system so that I'm not bloated, and I have to do exercises every day even if it's just walking around the kitchen table. I am driving myself insane and obviously this adds onto my anxiety or maybe it's my anxiety adding onto my ED? I'm also a tad bit depressed because I am 26 and I live at home and don't make enough to move out. Others who are younger than me are buying houses,new cars, getting married and me? Well I work full time,come home and lounge with my dog and play video games and make sure I take my meds. I'm literally a mess... I don't know what to do  I feel like I'm crazy.
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 DahveyJonez, made08, Skeezyks, StripedTapir
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#2
Sep 13, 2018, 01:32 AM
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Quote:
I'm not familiar enough with GAD/OCD/ED enough to really comment on it but having watched a child go through anxiety and compulsive thinking, it seems reasonable to think that the anxiety and eating disorder are probably both feeding from and feeding off each other. It seems there is something like an infinite-loop (typo or other error in a computer program that causes it to execute the same command forever) thought-response-thought cycle going on. It seemed like that with my son's anxieties, anyway. Even though you might not be in the most ideal situation as far as your medical coverage goes, realize that the making-lemonaide-from-lemons tripe can accomplish alot if you allow it. If you can't get to a doctor, and I'm sure there are many on the board here that would disagree with you and could make suggestions as how to do that. Just be patient to hang around for a while - use the keyword search function - chances are good there have been under-the-radar medical finance discussions before. Check out some current, peer-reviewed journals and books that deal with anxiety - arm yourself with knowledge - in fact, coming on this forum is a step towards doing that. The point is, to keep moving forward, even if by half-steps. Its important for a number of reasons that you develop the habit of being proactive with regards to your healthcare ( I know the meds and the maladies themselves can be so energy-draining but keep moving ). Seeds that drop into fertile soil have a much better chance at germinating, right?  Quote:
There are a lot worse places to be...trust me . You could ask my son, who just came home today from one of those 'worse places' and he was the happiest I remember seeing him - just to come home, play with the dogs, and take his meds.Quote:
Yes and others younger than you are foreclosing on those houses, getting visits from the repo-man in the wee hours of the morning, talking to their divorce attnys because the unbearable strain that comes from the reality of having to pay for new houses and cars before they are truly ready, has wrecked their marriages. And that divorce attny aint working for free, btw. Next stop: bankruptcy court. No worries, them? Aye? They'd kill to be in your shoes again. But I do know how you feel. Been there, felt that exact same 'I'm off the grid/world-is-passing-me-by' feeling. Something about being 26 does make you feel that you are in some sort of race, that you're being judged by someone or some thing, for not having those things by now. Yeah, I remember feeling that; but you know what? Its a lie. There wasn't a race and no one, except yourself, was even thinking about holding you up to that. Instead, look at your situation and face the truth: You will never, ever be in a better place than you are now, single and living at home with relatively few demands on your time, to find the solutions and work-arounds to your anxieties than you find yourself in now. I mean, you want to be able to enjoy those things, when you do acquire them, don't you? Of all your anxieties, this one is probably the easiest one to highlight for deletion because all that is required to resolve it is acknowledging reality, anyway. What if in doing that, just the act of resolving one source of anxiety opened up some kind of floodgate of empowerment? Things might really get out of hand and you might find that one success snowballing into other areas. I've seen it happen. Why not? Just another way to look at things, then? Good luck to ya! |
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#3
Sep 13, 2018, 10:38 AM
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Hello Ladybug: I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral!
 I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time.  Hopefully things have gotten at least a bit better since you posted this.  There is a forum, here on PC, dedicated to the subject of eating disorders. Here's a link, just in case you haven't already found it: https://forums.psychcentral.com/eating-disorders/ And then here are links to 10 articles from PsychCentral's archives. The first 5 offer tips with regard to things you can do day-to-day to manage anxiety. The next 4 discuss experiencing feelings of failure & lack of self-worth & what to do about them. The last talks about the use of journaling & meditation to reclaim joy: 9 Ways to Reduce Anxiety Right Here, Right Now 15 Small Steps You Can Take Today to Improve Anxiety Symptoms Top 10 Lesser-Known Self-Help Strategies for Anxiety 11 Tips to Help Manage Anxiety https://psychcentral.com/lib/20-tips...dium=popular17 https://blogs.psychcentral.com/nlp/2...ike-a-failure/ https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...hing-yourself/ https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...-from-failure/ https://psychcentral.com/blog/when-you-feel-worthless/ https://psychcentral.com/blog/using-...o-reclaim-joy/ I hope you find PC to be of benefit.
__________________
"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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