[silver_queen]

Just wondering if it's anxiety or plain avoidance (which I'm very good at) which means I avoid making just one phone call? All I need to do is ring HM Revenue & Customs and tell them that I am eligible for getting back the tax they docked off my wages last year, since I earn under a certain amount. This is for the last tax year which ended April 2007.

But I hate telephones and talking to unknown people on the phone and so I have never yet even tried it because the idea of it scares me so much. My dad asked me back in August if I had done it and again in January and I promised myself I would do it by the end of January but I just kept putting it off and off and I still haven't done it yet *sigh*. It's pathetic, all I have to do is make a phone call...

Is this excessive anxiety or just excessive avoidance? idk if it makes any difference whatever they are anyway...

[BalishBun]

I will put calling places off, I only answer the phones at work because I have to.

[Perna]

Just fill out the form and mail it off. If you have trouble, I'd go into the local office and talk to them in person (much easier for me):

http://www.hmrc.gov.uk/pensioners/fagr40_2003.shtml

[ECHOES]

Well i don't know and I'm not sure it matters, since behind both of those things is fear. And fear of the unknown is understandable, but we can't make the unknown ... known... until we push past that fear. For you, making the feared unknown.. the known.. would be to make the phone call, with a curiostiy to see how it turns out.. like wondering about the end of a really good book. And here you know some of the ending.. you get money back--yay!

Remember we can be afraid and still do what makes us afraid at times like this.

Maybe thinking of how proud you will be to tell your dad you have done it could help you to do it.

[Pingu]

Hi,

try and put your fears behind you and make the call. Or feel the fear and just do it. The HMRC are pretty good and normally very helpful when I have dealt with them, I had a scenario 2 years back where I had been overtaxed for 2 years before it had been noticed and i got the whole lot back without any great deal of problem. It was almost £2,000 - kind of nice to get that back

[splitimage]

I'd take a very deep breath and make the call. Maybe it would help to write out what you need to say / ask before hand so that you could have it by the phone. That way if your brain freezes, you'll still be able to have the conversation. And anything that gets you money back is a good thing, just think about all of the nice things you'll be able to do with it. Much better than finding out you owe money.

But I procrastinate on things I'm afraid of too. i didn't go to a dentist for 10 years because I was afraid. And when I did go I had to have all my old fillings replaced plus I had some new cavities so in total I had to have 14 fillings done. I swear i'm going regularly from now on.

spltimage

[jurplesman]

The fear of making a phone call to authority figures may be related to a low self-esteem coupled to a metabolic disorder that produces too much adrenaline. The metabolic aspect needs to be treated BEFORE the psychological aspects.

Please read:

Treatment of a Low Self-Esteem

And then study the

Self-Help Psychotherapy Course

from beginning to the end. Concentrate on:

What is Transactional Analysis? (TA)

and

Assertiveness Training Program