[Anonymous37919]

Yeah. I got arrested again today, then released on an undertaking. I'll explain what occurred, but I was lucky not to have been kept in the police station until Monday.

On Wednesday morning, I got arrested for contacting Joanna on Facebook. And I sent apology messages to Sara as well. That is all they even were. But despite not saying anything nasty to them since July, I've had strict orders never to contact them since 12 August, thus if I do that, they just grass me up to the pigs. So I was out all of that day, feeling very cold and tired, plus scared.

I knew that I would get the cops back at the door. So I eventually I got tired and they know where my one friend and family members stay, so I was pretty much screwed. There is no way you can sleep in a park wearing a thin jacket. Then they came and got me on Wednesday night. The next day in court, I was in the holding cells all day until my hearing, but the good news is that my final hearing is on 29 January as opposed to 20 March.

Anyway, last night, I feared another arrest since the previous arrest was only about Joanna, even though contacting the women at the same time was the same type of incident. However, the law sees that as two separate issues because it is two complaints. And being that it was Friday yesterday, I did not want a long stay in the police station if I had been apprehended.

I was in a restroom last night which cost me something like £55 and I left it at 11 AM to go to a bakery. And I was just crossing the road, when the cops got me. They made out they just wanted to take me to the hospital. Now, I reckon they somehow tracked my phone, as I got a text from some copper already saying I was reported as missing, but I do not know who said that. It seems like a funny coincidence they were just there. Huh?

Well, after I was in the hospital waiting to be seen by a doctor, they were getting confirmed about me breaching my bail, which I suspected was the case despite them not saying anything. I was sitting there playing music in the hospital's waiting lounge. I happened to turn my music off and one of them commented about a pink slip. That's their code for a detention.

So, I've been charged 8 times (yes - 8 times) in under a year, all because that company lied and I've reacted horribly to those lies.

I'm happy to discuss this, but what's the point? I'm really never gonna be able to move on. I've got court on Thursday and this has damaged my mental health. The company still has the cheek to offer me support, too.

Screw that. Would you want to work with an agency that instigated all this anguish?

[sideblinded]

I am so sorry for all of your troubles. I didn't even know that someone can be arrested for contacting someone on facebook. I just learned something.

[Anonymous37919]

It is because of some non-harassment orders the court has in place, so by just apologizing in a pleasant way, I am still breaching these specific conditions.

Instead of just accepting my apologies and discretely deleting the messages, the two former care workers just go and call the pigs. For poor old me, it ends up being goodbye freedom. That is why I want to disown that company entirely now. Screw all their help and offers. They never even handled this matter right from the beginning. Now they have the nerve to say only the present issue is what is most important. That is all crap. They could have sat us all down and come to a mutual understanding. Since the law took over, they have ceased caring.

Well, yes, the here and now is all that matters. But they did not do their part either. Who is the one who ends up mentally scarred and distraught? Not them, but me, because I am going to have to live with this horrid tragedy forever.

Oh Peter, I'm so sorry this happened to you, from the other post I didn't gather that you got arrested again and that is was this serious, I do apologize. That's just terrible, I truly hope you can somehow reach a state again that was like the one before all these things befell you. Many hugs

That's ridiculous! People have made up lies about me and their lies have ruined my life, so I know how you feel.

[muffinhead]

I feel for you, wish there was something I could do about it :/

[Anonymous37919]

Can the cops trace your mobile signal? It seems odd they 'just' saw me.

Originally Posted by Peter A

Can the cops trace your mobile signal? It seems odd they 'just' saw me.

I guess they can. I just didn't know they can do it so quickly, normally they show them on TV sitting with phone records and trying to track the coordinates of the transmitter/mast that handled the call, and then that still only puts you within about a 5 mile radius of the mast at the time of the call.

[rosska]

Originally Posted by Peter A

Can the cops trace your mobile signal? It seems odd they 'just' saw me.

Standard phone tracking isn't overly effective. Even modern triangulation searches only work well in urban environments where there are many cell towers in a short radius and they can use three of them to determine your location by working out the distance from each of the three towers. Though it still has a margin of error.

If you used a debit or credit card to pay for your room, it's more likely they tracked that.

[Anonymous37919]

Thank you. I find your posts very helpful, and I appreciate it. I've talked about my issues on other forums, with non autistic people, and they were all highly rude. Some were quite blunt (user "lenzi" on TAM, for example) and maybe members said stuff I didn't want to hear and it was the cold reality of it all, but I hardly see how they were able to really understand what the grief felt like for me, having never walked a mile in my shoes so to speak.

I feel clinically depressed now. Socializing was always very hard for me and it took a lot of courage to be able to 'freely' tell my aides things that to others is quite personal. Now having been betrayed and repeatedly let down by the very people I had relied on for years, it truly hurts and I feel I'll never be able to trust anyone again. It now feels like I should not have been so open towards them, but then was that not their job? To listen to me?

I always knew that (in spite of their nice nature) there was nothing else there in it for us. It was just a job to them. Sad, yet true. People that are employed to be caregivers do not want personal relationships with their clients during nor after their time with them contractually ends, and when they sense it may be heading down that route where you are getting cosy, well, the heart of a person has to be broken to get it across that it is a career and nothing more. They could have at least spoken to me first. The trouble is, the people in charge were unfortunately clueless, so that didn't help. And now they just use the court matters as one big "scapegoat" since the law has a ball and chain around my freedom. And since that is the reality of things, they probably feel relieved. They know that if I go see the ladies, they're just a phone-call away from having me imprisoned again.

In fact, I have to go to a social worker session tomorrow for my last hearing on Thursday. Although I want to rant and rave about what they did, that ain't always a wise move. They usually want you to feel remorseful over the 'crimes' you committed (yes, saying sorry to someone is a crime, apparently). It's stupid. However, your fate in the courtroom depends on what rubbish the person types up for the procurator fiscal to read out in front of the judge. So obviously a good report could bring forth a good result. If they think you are still a danger to the person or individuals named in the charges, then you can expect to be locked up again, assuming you have been in jail before. Only sentenced prisoners don't get it as easy as remanded ones. When you are on remand, you can get daily visits apart from on Sundays and if you are a sentenced inmate, I'm sure it's only like 3 visits per month or something you are entitled to. They threatened to stop my visits before because I would raise my voice when my mother came to see me.

sorry you had to go through this, peter.

[Anonymous37919]

I have to be in court tomorrow morning. I really will be glad when this is all over, plus I really want to go back to my flat if I can do so. I'm going to try and address that tomorrow nicely in front of the judge.

I just hope I will not be sent to jail. But I saw a social worker yesterday and he could type in a load of trash about me, which won't be of much use in the courtroom.

Originally Posted by Peter A

I have to be in court tomorrow morning. I really will be glad when this is all over, plus I really want to go back to my flat if I can do so. I'm going to try and address that tomorrow nicely in front of the judge.

I just hope I will not be sent to jail. But I saw a social worker yesterday and he could type in a load of trash about me, which won't be of much use in the courtroom.

All the best brother , I hope true real justice prevails and you get your life back again.

[Anonymous37919]

This is ridiculous. So very ridiculous.

I was in court yesterday, and they deferred it AGAIN until in February so they can get a psychiatry report. I thought I was going to get it over and done with. There is a chance I can go back to my flat next month, but it's a slim one at that.

[I'm.happy.now]

Originally Posted by Peter A

Yeah. I got arrested again today, then released on an undertaking. I'll explain what occurred, but I was lucky not to have been kept in the police station until Monday.

On Wednesday morning, I got arrested for contacting Joanna on Facebook. And I sent apology messages to Sara as well. That is all they even were. But despite not saying anything nasty to them since July, I've had strict orders never to contact them since 12 August, thus if I do that, they just grass me up to the pigs. So I was out all of that day, feeling very cold and tired, plus scared.

I knew that I would get the cops back at the door. So I eventually I got tired and they know where my one friend and family members stay, so I was pretty much screwed. There is no way you can sleep in a park wearing a thin jacket. Then they came and got me on Wednesday night. The next day in court, I was in the holding cells all day until my hearing, but the good news is that my final hearing is on 29 January as opposed to 20 March.

Anyway, last night, I feared another arrest since the previous arrest was only about Joanna, even though contacting the women at the same time was the same type of incident. However, the law sees that as two separate issues because it is two complaints. And being that it was Friday yesterday, I did not want a long stay in the police station if I had been apprehended.

I was in a restroom last night which cost me something like £55 and I left it at 11 AM to go to a bakery. And I was just crossing the road, when the cops got me. They made out they just wanted to take me to the hospital. Now, I reckon they somehow tracked my phone, as I got a text from some copper already saying I was reported as missing, but I do not know who said that. It seems like a funny coincidence they were just there. Huh?

Well, after I was in the hospital waiting to be seen by a doctor, they were getting confirmed about me breaching my bail, which I suspected was the case despite them not saying anything. I was sitting there playing music in the hospital's waiting lounge. I happened to turn my music off and one of them commented about a pink slip. That's their code for a detention.

So, I've been charged 8 times (yes - 8 times) in under a year, all because that company lied and I've reacted horribly to those lies.

I'm happy to discuss this, but what's the point? I'm really never gonna be able to move on. I've got court on Thursday and this has damaged my mental health. The company still has the cheek to offer me support, too.

Screw that. Would you want to work with an agency that instigated all this anguish?

The way I read your explanation is that you were legally told not to contact either person.
You did contact them. No excuses, everybody MUST obey the law. Even you. You will never be happy unless you take responsibility and get some counseling.
Good Luck

[Anonymous37919]

Yes, but when you have feelings for someone (either relevant to the relationship we had or not), those feelings just don't go away. It's very easy to fall for people in the caring industries.

Originally Posted by I'm.happy.now

The way I read your explanation is that you were legally told not to contact either person.
You did contact them. No excuses, everybody MUST obey the law. Even you. You will never be happy unless you take responsibility and get some counseling.
Good Luck

Don't even get me started on "the law" as people so love to profess and live by so religiously.

Truly I tell you, anyone who brings unjust and unwarranted pre-emptive cause (hatred) against a brother is A MURDERER, which is exactly what these two "so-called" caregivers or whatever they called themselves did.

You know as well as I do, that "the law" is the tool of the proud, the paranoid, the insecure, the wicked, the "normal" (conformist) and the judgemental to condemn those who they feel are encroaching on their false sense of safety, and is a tool for the insecure and judgemental to "measure" their own efforts against to justify in their minds that they are doing OK, they are law-abiding, when in fact they are anything but. Because I mean, you obey the law, so you must be doing everything right and OK in your life, right? WRONG.

Not one living, breathing human is in a position to accuse another by the law, every single born person is a sinner and a law-breaker, even the most purest of snow-mouthed, young, beautiful virgins, hell, even cops and government officials who swear by it.

That's why, don't even go to "the law" because if an accuser can provide one example where someone broke the law, they can turn around and give back ten thousand examples of where the accuser broke it UNWITTINGLY.

Be careful of throwing the law around at people, it is a lethal boomerang!

[Alone & confused]

Originally Posted by StbGuy

Don't even get me started on "the law" as people so love to profess and live by so religiously.

Truly I tell you, anyone who brings unjust and unwarranted pre-emptive cause (hatred) against a brother is A MURDERER, which is exactly what these two "so-called" caregivers or whatever they called themselves did.

You know as well as I do, that "the law" is the tool of the proud, the paranoid, the insecure, the wicked, the "normal" (conformist) and the judgemental to condemn those who they feel are encroaching on their false sense of safety, and is a tool for the insecure and judgemental to "measure" their own efforts against to justify in their minds that they are doing OK, they are law-abiding, when in fact they are anything but. Because I mean, you obey the law, so you must be doing everything right and OK in your life, right? WRONG.

Not one living, breathing human is in a position to accuse another by the law, every single born person is a sinner and a law-breaker, even the most purest of snow-mouthed, young, beautiful virgins, hell, even cops and government officials who swear by it.

That's why, don't even go to "the law" because if an accuser can provide one example where someone broke the law, they can turn around and give back ten thousand examples of where the accuser broke it UNWITTINGLY.

Be careful of throwing the law around at people, it is a lethal boomerang!

In the U.S., our government will simply re-write "the laws" to make THEIR OWN unethical behavior "leagl"! It's getting way beyond ridiculous in this country!

Originally Posted by Alone & confused

In the U.S., our government will simply re-write "the laws" to make THEIR OWN unethical behavior "leagl"! It's getting way beyond ridiculous in this country!

Yes, and by doing so, and by people like the two caregivers of Peter abusing the law to their advantage, they lower the standards and make the law corrupt and useless.

[Hellion]

Originally Posted by Peter A

Thank you. I find your posts very helpful, and I appreciate it. I've talked about my issues on other forums, with non autistic people, and they were all highly rude. Some were quite blunt (user "lenzi" on TAM, for example) and maybe members said stuff I didn't want to hear and it was the cold reality of it all, but I hardly see how they were able to really understand what the grief felt like for me, having never walked a mile in my shoes so to speak.

I feel clinically depressed now. Socializing was always very hard for me and it took a lot of courage to be able to 'freely' tell my aides things that to others is quite personal. Now having been betrayed and repeatedly let down by the very people I had relied on for years, it truly hurts and I feel I'll never be able to trust anyone again. It now feels like I should not have been so open towards them, but then was that not their job? To listen to me?

I always knew that (in spite of their nice nature) there was nothing else there in it for us. It was just a job to them. Sad, yet true. People that are employed to be caregivers do not want personal relationships with their clients during nor after their time with them contractually ends, and when they sense it may be heading down that route where you are getting cosy, well, the heart of a person has to be broken to get it across that it is a career and nothing more. They could have at least spoken to me first. The trouble is, the people in charge were unfortunately clueless, so that didn't help. And now they just use the court matters as one big "scapegoat" since the law has a ball and chain around my freedom. And since that is the reality of things, they probably feel relieved. They know that if I go see the ladies, they're just a phone-call away from having me imprisoned again.

In fact, I have to go to a social worker session tomorrow for my last hearing on Thursday. Although I want to rant and rave about what they did, that ain't always a wise move. They usually want you to feel remorseful over the 'crimes' you committed (yes, saying sorry to someone is a crime, apparently). It's stupid. However, your fate in the courtroom depends on what rubbish the person types up for the procurator fiscal to read out in front of the judge. So obviously a good report could bring forth a good result. If they think you are still a danger to the person or individuals named in the charges, then you can expect to be locked up again, assuming you have been in jail before. Only sentenced prisoners don't get it as easy as remanded ones. When you are on remand, you can get daily visits apart from on Sundays and if you are a sentenced inmate, I'm sure it's only like 3 visits per month or something you are entitled to. They threatened to stop my visits before because I would raise my voice when my mother came to see me.

Sorry you are going through this, admittedly though I do not understand how it would feel as I've never had a situation like this. However, at the risk of being one of those people who says something you don't want to hear....well maybe it would be best not to attempt any further contact with Joanna and Sarah, I mean hell if they did betray your trust the way you describe why would you even want to apologize to them or have any further contact? Either way I do not think your life is 'over' but it may be time to attempt to find ways of somewhat moving on from this.....and also so you don't end up with any more legal troubles since that stuff can really get in the way of life.

Also the only reason the apology was a 'crime' was because from the sound of it there was a legal order for you not to contact these people regardless of the reason...I am assuming these individuals do not oppose the idea of you not being allowed to contact them........which indicates they agree and aren't on your side, so not worth it to waste any more time on those two especially if it will end up with you locked in jail that is certainly not a good place for people with autism.

[Hellion]

Originally Posted by Peter A

Yes, but when you have feelings for someone (either relevant to the relationship we had or not), those feelings just don't go away. It's very easy to fall for people in the caring industries.

Even so that will not stop you from getting in trouble...the court doesn't care what you feel for them, it cares about if you break a law or not. Of course feelings don't just go away....but you either need to get in some therapy to address it or find some other way that wont get you in trouble....otherwise if you keep trying to make up with/contact these people who obviously don't care for you you're just going to get in more trouble and they'll just keep getting on with their lives.

I have no idea why you're not allowed to contact them, or what they did/didn't do.......but is it worth getting in any more trouble over?

[Anonymous37919]

Well, if there is one thing people have been trying to teach me throughout this entire ordeal, it's that you CANNOT change how other people feel or think, and trying hard to do so will only make me appear desperately foolish. We established already that nobody on my end even cares by this point and they seem to be adding more fuel to the already out of control fire by being deceptive, so trying to get them to understand or give into my demands is futile and there is a high risk of being locked up in jail. Is it really worth it over two ex-support workers that are not listening let alone giving a crap?

Also, ranting about them online is probably no longer that healthy either. I'm sure you know a song that goes something like: The more I see you, the more I want you...' or something. Well, that probably applies to when you discuss them. Talking about them just reminds me. You know that too, so it probably ain't helping me to draw my lines.

Originally Posted by Peter A

Well, if there is one thing people have been trying to teach me throughout this entire ordeal, it's that you CANNOT change how other people feel or think, and trying hard to do so will only make me appear desperately foolish. We established already that nobody on my end even cares by this point and they seem to be adding more fuel to the already out of control fire by being deceptive, so trying to get them to understand or give into my demands is futile and there is a high risk of being locked up in jail. Is it really worth it over two ex-support workers that are not listening let alone giving a crap?

Also, ranting about them online is probably no longer that healthy either. I'm sure you know a song that goes something like: The more I see you, the more I want you...' or something. Well, that probably applies to when you discuss them. Talking about them just reminds me. You know that too, so it probably ain't helping me to draw my lines.

Couldn't have said it better myself. They just don't see it your way and the more you try the more they take measures against you.

You sit with the same problem I sat with - we are both in too deep emotionally. We went all in and bet all our chips on red, and because it felt so right we took a huge chance, and it came up black, so to speak, and we lost everything in the process.

Nobody's got any sympathy for the guy that just lost all his chips on a bet, they just tell you to get out and let the others have a turn.

The problem is we still want to play in the casino more than anything on the wheel, we know one more chance would turn everything around, but the security is throwing us out by the door, telling us to leave.

[Anonymous37919]

I don't know why the heck they bother to do this, but the last time I was in court, they had a senior attend to back me up. But I reckon they just feel guilty or curious. Perhaps a bit of both. While we were waiting to get called into the courtroom, we found a quiet spot to sit down and he chucked it in my face that it has came too far to be amended as I scared the two ladies, yet I argued my point that the boss people did *NOT* even try to give me a second chance in mid-2014. Complete crap if you ask me.

[juniper1959]

So sorry, Peter, to hear about your troubles. I don't know the whole story, but from what your'e written, it seems like you have a restraining order against you? (That's what we say in the USA.) And that likely means zero contact of any kind, anywhere, any reason. My advice would be to talk with great respect to whoever has power over you and reassure them that this was a misunderstanding and it won't happen again. Maybe even ask for someone to clarify the rules to you. That would look very much like you were eager to make things right. Once you understand the rules, follow them. Do not give them another opportunity to pick you up. They have no obligation to be flexible or understanding, only to uphold the law. If you get someone who is flexible and understanding, consider yourself lucky! If you get someone who is strict and unyielding, that's what most people get. Best wishes!