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Old May 14, 2016, 11:27 AM
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ToeJam ToeJam is offline
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Wondering how others deal with communication when they struggle to process information?

Been having problems recently with 'some' health care professionals; is not necessarily intentional and I don't blame them for it... it just feels like half the time we are not talking about the same thing... like it's down two parallel paths rather than the same one... has been leading to frustration on both sides and I've been beating myself up due to what I see as my inability to respond down their line of inquiry rather than going off on some tangent (to them) that I think is what they are getting at.

Not sure if any of this makes sense?

I get very worried with what I say (never knowingly rude) and when I get things wrong... is like the world has collapsed.
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  #2  
Old May 14, 2016, 06:30 PM
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Nike007 Nike007 is offline
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Hello. This makes total sense to me. I sometimes feel when I am talking to someone that we are talking about different things. I worry about saying something dumb due to anxiety, but I think about things I have said incorrectly and I dwell about it later. Or I feel like they were incorrect, but not entirely sure.

Anyways, what I do is ask people to clarify what they mean, or if what I'm saying is making sense to them. I check to see if "we are on the same page" kinda thing. Like, if we are thinking the same thing.

Maybe this hasn't helped much, sorry.

Social anxiety disorder, ASD, GAD, OCD, and panic disorder

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I have ASD so please be kind if I say something socially unacceptable. Thank you.
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  #3  
Old May 14, 2016, 06:51 PM
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ToeJam ToeJam is offline
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Was helpful Nike, thanks... at the least I know I'm not the only one I do try to clarify... can be hard when those I'm talking to are low on patience though. Had a nasty experience last week and it put me in a bit of a spiral as I was given no opportunity to discuss or reconcile the issue
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  #4  
Old May 14, 2016, 07:47 PM
Anonymous37780
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ToeJam, it makes sense to me also. It use to be you could go to your doctor tell them what is wrong as to how you feel and they listened. then they would work with you to try something and or a medicine. you aren't allowed to say anything to a dr. nowadays or they think you are diagnosing yourself to the dr. and they treat you badly. that might be what is happening: you are communicating and they don't want to hear what you feel is wrong with you.. they want you to let them ask the questions then push you through all the tests. That is what i have found and it was totally counter productive. It destroyed a 14 year with another doctor that worked for me with 3 that did not. Now i don't do anything. My new dr. i won't let them do anything but monitor my meds and pain, that is it. We all want to be treated with respect and when we feel we don't get it we clam up and stop communicating. to them there is nothing wrong, to us they wasted our time. the key is getting someone who listens and works with you. I hope you have a better experience next time. blessings and tc ps.. i love the cat with the kitten in its mouth.. it is adorable
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Old May 15, 2016, 10:55 AM
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I can relate (grrrrrrrrrrr)
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Old May 15, 2016, 08:13 PM
Chyialee Chyialee is offline
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Makes total sense, y'all. (And GRRrrr as well, Fuzzybear! )

That's a reason why I write things down. I "speak" Health-Care-ese very fluently -- and I have to dial that back A LOT whilst speaking to HC professionals with whom I'm not already acquainted.

I make a "Quickie-List" of bullet points on a 3x5 card or in a little spiral pocket notebook....and then I don't end up so frustrated.
Well. Not usually anyway, altho there are times I wanna scream.

Hugs, all. It can rly suck.

xo, Chyia, ~heavysigh~
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Old May 16, 2016, 01:55 PM
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Doctor ( "good doctor" ) - how have you been?

Bear (thinking wtf to say) - well... Uh

Doctor - same?

Convo goes on a bit longer, doctor tries to understand (or are they another malignant narcissist in disguise )

Doctor prescribes stronger meds with more scary side effects
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  #8  
Old May 16, 2016, 09:26 PM
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Lexi232 Lexi232 is offline
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sometimes i try to use the pic icons and aac's or something like that where i want to communicate something but i dont know what that something is. the multiple choices seem to be what helps me.

ive also had that experience with those who im trying to communicate to, and they kinda get it, but not really. often they will ask me why im mad at them during this time... im not even able to communicate that im not mad at them, it has nothing to do with them, im mad at myself and so frustraited.

sometimes i also try to put it like they might understand more... lately i was telling one of my healthcare workers that i may seem like ive grown more and not so autistic, but its my meds that enable me to speak and to communicate and not all .... whatever that would be called how i was. and i was telling her that its like my glasses. glasses work like my meds. they enable me to do and see things more like others, but if you take the glasses off, i will still be the same person that i was before getting the glasses.
.... then i got a response that didnt help though...she kinda tried to add a optimistic type of spin on it. and didnt really seem that i communicated what i was trying to get across... even though she was trying to understand.

but then i get stuck... and its constant. not nearly close enough to the common response i get like "oh i get stuck too once in awhile but its okay! we all do that!" or replace "stuck" with anything else that is way more in intensity than just once in while.

meds certainly do seem too help. but i think its different for every person, including for ages. (stimulants was a super big no no for me when i was 4 and 5 and up, it brought on a 5-7 hour long meltdown each time they tried me on it. but now it doesnt do that to me... it weird.. but aparently it differs also for the same person at some point...
sorry for rambling, and stuff...
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  #9  
Old May 19, 2016, 09:42 AM
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eskielover eskielover is offline
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It makes sense. I struggled with communications with my husband the whole time we were married. It's a lot easier to try & make sure he understood what I was telling him or spend the time trying to make sure I understood him than it is when dealing with the health care people. But if they know you are ASD, they should understand the need to make sure communication is clear.

Maybe end with a "did I understand you correctly......" repeating what you think they told you. That way if not they can clarify better.

Shoot, we all have problems talking with health care professionals ASD or not. I find the need for communicating that way with them myself.

Lol...I have a physicians assistant at my pain specialist from China. Sweetest lady but communicating is not easy....very similar situation
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