Feel free to punch my mug

If I ever say something that involves despising or underestimating myself.
I'm not aware of the great amount of times I do it.
I rarely do it with anyone, only with me.
I feel like if I was apologising for my existence.
Only lately, I was being aware of this terrible attitude. My guy was the first who pointed it to me because he perceived that even my voice pitch sounds submissive.
I'm pretty fed up with this attitude. There's a middle point between being an arrogant person and having such an inconsideration towards oneself.

I know that I'm not gonna change it in a wink. It's like my way to breath. I'm thinking of what causes this way now. Meanwhile, I won't put into words these self-destructing thoughts that I see now how unfair are.

Apart from punching my face, do you have any thought about why a person is so negative towards himself.

Hello AzulOscura: I don't know as I have any particularly helpful thoughts as to why people do this. I have had this tendency as well. Over the years, my wife has just kept telling me not to say that sort of thing whenever I did so. So, over time, I've kind-of learned not to. I still slip up occasionally. But for the most part, when one of those self-deprecating thoughts comes to mind, I now have the ability to quash it before I open my mouth. I still do it to myself mentally though. When I do, I simply try to smile to the thought & allow it to fade at its own pace...

Yes, I'm trying at least, to avoid putting these horrible thoughts into words. I know they are automatic and it's needed a great willpower to keep them under control if it is even possible.
It's our way to breath. Is it possible for someone to learn how to breath in a different way?