[sugahorse1]

Well, I have mentioned in other posts I'm looking for a new pdoc. Think mine doesn't understand me when I say SEVER DEPRESSION. Anyway, in one last, vain attempt, I sent her a mail to see how long she would take to reply, if she cares or if she has any suggestions.

Well, she tried to phone me 15 minutes ago and I was too scared to answer the phone - WTF?? I see she sent a mail that she'd try phone again, I haven't listened to the voice message. I don't know what it is with me?!?

Now her e-mail reads that I should try stop the AD when it runs out - then I'll only be on 400mg Epilim (Sodium Valporate) and anti-anxiety tabs as needed.

ARG - I just don't want to make decisions, I don't know what to do, I feel like running away from the whole thing!!!

[Karen1933]

No...don't run. Call her back...I think she truly wants to help..give her the chance...I wish more docs would be so quick in returning calls...I hate the waiting more than anything.

Email her...tell her you're afraid...it sucks sometimes, but honesty is best, and I'm sure she's dealt with this before...just give her a chance...

[sugahorse1]

I just sent her a mail - I'll copy the conversation below:

Sorry, was in a meeting.
The Edronax finishes in about a week. I’ll be back at work on Thursday.

If the Edronax is discontinued, would this mean a total discontinuation of any anti-depressants? That thought makes me a bit nervous.
In general, my functioning as a person is probably only at 50% - I just feel I cannot do my job. My self-confidence has taken a knock, and I find myself clinging to other people to get through the day. This is not made any easier with the anxiety. I sometimes wish I just didn’t feel anything at all, rather than being depressed and about 3 weeks ago it was again borderline suicidal. Luckily after 2 days it lifted.

I just really feel I need a drastic change, because nothing seems to be running a semi-predictable path anymore.
My hypomanic episodes have me making a fool of myself at work and talking out of line most of the time.

Thanks for listening!

Regards
Jackie

-----Original Message-----
From: Ann Barrett
Sent: 15 June 2010 04:32 PM
To:
Subject: Re: Dr Barrett -

Dear Jackie,

Why dont you stop the edronax when it runs out.
Will try and phone you on Thursday.

Ann Barrett

----- Original Message -----

From:

To:

Sent: Monday, June 14, 2010 8:10 AM

Subject: Dr Barrett -


Hi Dr Barrett

Just some feedback; I think I’m doing OK – most of the time I seem to be able to keep my depression at bay. The last month or so I have been extremely anxious and agitated, and have on a good few occasions really lost my temper beyond what is considered acceptable and the norm.
I’ve have episodes of very high emotions and crying for no explainable reason.
I’ve had the odd day of really bad depression, at times with very negative thoughts, which lasted for +- 2 days.
My sleep has been rather interrupted unless I take a full Zopimed.

Please let me know what we need to do, as my Edronax is running out and we need to discuss a new script.

My cell number is xxx

Thank you

[Trippin2.0]

I agree with Karen, email her, and tell her you're afraid,express yourself as openly and honestly as possible. I'm sure you won't have to rationalize/legitimize your fear in your email. She's the pdoc, so I'm sure she's dealt with this type of reaction before...

Just be honest with her about what you're going through right now, she can only help if she knows something's wrong, and right now she's your only option...

Please suga, take that step... thinking of you!

[Karen1933]

so...was that conversation enough to calm you?

[Moreta]

I absolutely HATE calling people/talking to people on the phone. I would rather talk in person or send an email.

Hopefully, she will work with you so you can get the care you need.

Good Luck!

[sugahorse1]

will chat to her on Thurs - thanks all

[sugahorse1]

I think I needed a day off work (Public holiday) to not think about this for a day or so

[Trippin2.0]

I think that's a good idea...you need some personal space to gains perspective...

Hope things work out for you soon! XOXO