[blueoctober]

Yesterday I found an old journal that I had wrote down some goals that I wanted to complete in 2009. I think I wrote them last June.

It was a bit depressing because I only met one of the goals. I'm trying to keep it in perspective, but I was disappointed in myself.

I did a new list of goals last night and here's hoping I complete them!!! Does anyone else write their goals down?

[FeelingHopeful]

Blue October , That is awesome! Good for you

I think it's awesome that you wrote some goals down. Sending you positive thoughts and hoping you complete each and every one. As a matter of fact, yesterday I began the process of writing down goals that I'd like to accomplish: short-term, medium, and long-term goals. I've only written the short-term goals thus far, but I'll be working on it more today. I think it's very important for me, because I need my life to have meaning, so these goals are a good thing for my life.

[blueoctober]

Thanks feelingsad and melissarecovering. That's great melissarecovering to start that at such a young age. Good for you!

I e-mailed a friend of mine (she is diagnosed BP as well) and she gave some good advice, so I thought I'd share it:

"One goal accomplished is one less to do. It is one good habit you don't have yet to cultivate. Instead of a lengthy list try just three goals and be proud if you master any. It is more than most do in a lifetime much less someone with an imbalance like us."

[WendyAussie]

I think it is important to do this. I use a therapy model called ACT and Mindfulness. One of the many strategies involved is to do a list of your core Values in every area of your life. And once you've worked and re-worked that in consultation with a therapist who is skilled in the methodology, you then extrapolate the Values into Valued Actions. I have an ongoing matrix/table of all that. It's an evolving thing.

Because Bipolar Disorder is such a serious illness and has real impacts on the various outcomes in our lives and our capacity to move forward, we need to look at these Valued Actions/Goals in a very flexible way - so we done feel like failures if we don't have progress, or even have reversals in someof the areas. And this also allows the whole list to be very fluid to allow for our changing wants, needs, strengths and shortcomings and the incoming stressors in our lives and also our brain chemical changes.

I have learned that I am a perfectionist (I was really offended at my therapist when she first called me that). But I do agree now and of course the person I am most a perfectionist with is myself - I set very high standards for myself. So part of this journey of identifying Values and Valued Actions is also to just hold each one lightly and not allow the whole process to be a rod for my own back - an opportunity to self flagellate when I don't move forward in all areas at the pace I would like.

But it HAS been very helpful, even though I do fall into getting frustrated at a lack of progress sometimes- that in itself is a major part of the journey I think.

Originally Posted by WendyAussie

Because Bipolar Disorder is such a serious illness and has real impacts on the various outcomes in our lives and our capacity to move forward, we need to look at these Valued Actions/Goals in a very flexible way - so we done feel like failures if we don't have progress, or even have reversals in someof the areas. And this also allows the whole list to be very fluid to allow for our changing wants, needs, strengths and shortcomings and the incoming stressors in our lives and also our brain chemical changes.

Flexibility and fluidity, excellent point. Because like you say, since things change for us, it's important to let our lists change too! It would be so easy to get locked in to them and beat ourselves up over it (like we don't do that enough already!). It's almost like remembering to allow them to change. That's how I would have to think of it (yes, "would"... I'm terrible about goal-setting let alone follow through. Just never look very far ahead at all. Never have. Not a good thing, but there you have it. I'm ok with *very* short term, like, say, getting out of bed and maybe doing the dishes, just not the ones that are at all longer term.)

Originally Posted by blueoctober

"Instead of a lengthy list try just three goals and be proud if you master any. It is more than most do in a lifetime much less someone with an imbalance like us."

Yes! So true. You know, in reading your first post, something jumped out at me. Try not to feel so disappointed. Why? Remember, you found the list. Which means it was lost or at least out of sight, out of mind. Then how could the list even remind you of your goals?! Given that, not accomplishing them would be expected, so try to be gentle with yourself, ok?

[blueoctober]

Originally Posted by Innerzone You know, in reading your first post, something jumped out at me. Try not to feel so disappointed. Why? Remember, you [I

found [/i]the list. Which means it was lost or at least out of sight, out of mind. Then how could the list even remind you of your goals?! Given that, not accomplishing them would be expected, so try to be gentle with yourself, ok?

So true Innerzone! Thanks for the reminder!

WendyAussie, great post! Thank-you!

[WendyAussie]

Thank you for this thread. It also reminded me about my list and I went through it last night and updated everything, adjusted things like we've said and it feels good, helps me feel I'm on track and moving forward ever-so slowly, at a glacial pace in many areas really, but at least going forward.