Homeless and anxious

Well, It has happened. I am once again on the streets with a few pieces of clothing and my laptop, which I refuse to give up. The support system that I thought I had in place is not there. The job I think I got can't get a hold of me. I take 1 step forward and get knocked 8 back. I wonder why this keeps happening. I am not doing the same thing over and expecting different results. I am doing things differently and getting the same results. It makes absolutely no sense. What is the sense of trying to crawl out of the hole when it seems that everyone person I know just wants to throw dirt on me and bury me? I just want to give up and say to hell with everything.

((((TallyGlenn)))) - where are you staying at the moment? Are you on meds and still taking them? Please access all the community services available to help you and please don't give up. You can be a survivor and I pray you'll get through this hard time.

Are you recieving funds from social services? I think a person needs an address for that. I'm concerned how you'll eat. Any chance you could stay with a friend?

what I thought was my support system disappeared. Who I thought were friends are supposedly unable to help. Everyone and thing vaporized as though it did not ever exist.

Wow that's very hard and scary. Are you normally on medication and do you have some with you ATM? I wish I could say or do more.

I have my meds with me. Fortunately I have the VA for that issue. With having Bi-polar and PTSD I get a double whammy. Food should not be an issue as I can get at least one meal a day here in Tallahassee. But with the PTSD I can not stay at a shelter, it will trigger me. They remind me of the orphanages I was in as a kid and have never gotten over it. They are just warehouses. I am trying to stay put and maybe figure something out. If I get triggered I will run and that is not good for anything.
When things are going well everyone says they are there for you. But let something happen and they disappear very quickly.

Could the VA help you with housing needs? It's good you have your meds and I understand your reasons for not being able to stand a shelter. I really hope your circumstances improve.

We really don't have much of a VA here. It is only an outpatient clinic. The closest hospital with full services is at Lake City which is over 100 miles away. I will cope, this is not the first bout of homelessness I have had. I had just hoped against hope that this time it would be different. But the more things change the more they stay the same.

TallyGlenn, I'm so sorry to hear your situation has taken this turn. Lynn P. asks and said so much of what I'd have said (only better!) I'm glad (though sorry for the reason), that you explained the shelter thing...

The VA will take you to the closest hospital with a domicillary if you ask Mental Health for help. Ending homlessness among Veterans is our #1 Priority. Get with your Mental Heath Out patient clinic and ask for a space in the domicillary. They can also give you work in the IT/CWT Programs that are available. I work for the VA and I am a Veteran....PM me if you need further assistance and I will put you in touch with the program coordinator.

Been in a similiar situation. I'm also a veteran and I have been homeless before. Like you I had my meds. I also have PTSD and my trigger as I have recently found out is my family. I am staying with my family and feel like bolting constantly which would put me right about where you are right now. Thank the lord for benzos.

I put a step forward and then get shoved 4 steps back it feels like. But I take it moment by moment. Almost instigated an argument because of this. They said they would do stuff that they haven't done and told me to wait on... this would have put me in my own place by now simply because my family is stupid and doesn't listen. So much for my support system.

I just wanted to let you know people are going through what you are right now. I'm glad you and I have this place for support because without it... well, there's those guys... and those are the guys I was running from.

Take it second by second if you have too.

Good Luck,
I work in Youth Homelessness- in Australia; so not much practical assistance- however... I have to wonder what your Community Services are doing for you? In Aus Mental Health is linked to Housing- meaning that Gov has a policy that nobody is discharged from Mental Health facility into Homelessness and those with diagnosed Mental Health are given Priority access to Gov and Community Housing. I am not familiar with the network in your region but hope that the Community Services are supporting your need for safe longterm and sustainable housing. Thinking of you, sleep safe..

Sorry I have not been on the last few days, but I have not been able to charge my laptop because I was too far out of downtown. The VA has a program here but I do not qualify for it. The criteria is you have to be a vet, yeah i am, you have to be homeless, yeah i think, you have to have a diagnosed mental illness, yeah i do and you have to have a substance abuse issue, ooops i don't. So I can't get into the housing program here. There is nothing else here except the shelters where they warehouse you and that will definately set off my PTSD. The closest facility with a domicillary is 105 miles away with a waiting list. I was truly hoping that the company that I interviewed with would have called one of my numbers after taking the physical and drug and alcohol tests. So far no news and that can not be a good thing.

Miserable night. It rained and was windy. Did not sleep at all. Hope today is better. Have not heard from any so called friends. Even my DBSA group seems to be avoiding me. Being homeless with a mental illness must be like having the plague. People must be afraid that they will catch it.

I'm so sorry you have fallen thru the cracks...I wish I had something to offer, but it seems like you have explored all the avenues...I hope something changes soon.

I am used to falling through the cracks. Without a substance abuse problem getting help in this town is non-existence. I am a member of the Tallahassee Peer Leadership Group, this is a group of peer specialists, and we put on a presentation for the Trauma Informed Care workgroup about barriers that people with mental illnesses and have other issues have to deal with while trying to get help in this town. The final results were very informative. On a scale of 1-5, we asked how likely they would be use the system that Tallahassee has in place as of right now, it was rated at 1.8. They were the providers. So how likely is a person with a mental illness or homeless or both likely to use the system that is place?

Have you been in touch with your local Veterans Rep? I think you are getting a wrong answer from the VA....you do not have to have an addiction to be admitted to the rehab program. I know because we have many non-addicted, but mental health veterans in our programs. Someone is not telling you the truth.

HI TG

I live in sacto, ca and I would like to offer you a place to stay. I don't have much, just a small studio but I will make up a bed for you to sleep in and share my food with you. I wish I could do more to help. Just know that I care and want to help.

I appreciate the gesture but I live in Florida. That would be a long walk. lol

I'm 58 and have suffered like this for my entire life. What I finally found out is I don't make good decisions because I have a very low working memory and a very low executive function. I don't have enough working memory to store all the necessary and useful information I need to make good decisions. Also, I am not able to process, organize and use the limited information I do have (In other words I don't have the mental ability to remember information and make good decisions). Maybe you should ask your primary care doctor to refer you for some Adult ADD and/or Onset Dementia testing. By the way this doesn't mean you're retarded and it doesn't mean you can't succeed. It means you must learn to understand your personal (mental) limitations and that you will need to study harder, try harder, work harder and fight harder than everyone else around you in order to achieve the average, minimal things (that come naturally to most other people). It sounds to me like you're a fighter. Good Luck.

Public and Intergovernmental Affairs


VA to Expand Housing for Homeless Veterans and Their Families
June 8, 2011
VA to Expand Housing for Homeless Veterans and Their Families

Unused & Underused VA Buildings to Be Developed

WASHINGTON – The Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) continues to develop housing opportunities for homeless and at-risk Veterans by adding 34 VA locations across the country. This strategy will increase the Department’s available beds by over 5,000. VA currently has 15,000 transitional beds available to homeless Veterans.
“This initiative will significantly support our efforts to eliminate Veteran homelessness and improve quality of life for Veterans,” said Secretary of Veterans Affairs Eric K. Shinseki. “We have a moral obligation to ensure that Veterans and their families have access to affordable housing and medical services that will help them get back on their feet.”
Culminating two years of work to end homelessness among Veterans, a recent strategic study, the Building Utilization Review and Repurposing (BURR) initiative, identified unused and underused buildings at existing VA property with the potential to develop new housing opportunities for homeless or at-risk Veterans and their families through public-private partnerships and VA’s enhanced-use lease (EUL) program. Under the EUL program, VA retains ownership of the land and can determine and control its reuse.
Additional opportunities identified through BURR will include housing for returning Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans and their families, assisted living for elderly Veterans and continuum of living residential communities.
The project will support VA’s goal of ending Veteran homelessness by providing safe, affordable, cost effective, and sustainable housing for Veterans on a priority basis.
To expedite the project, contractors will be asked to develop multiple sites in a region. VA will hold a one-day national Industry Forum in Chicago for interested organizations on July 13, 2011. For information regarding the forum mail to: VA_BURR@va.gov.
Supportive housing projects are planned for homeless Veterans and their families at 23 VA sites: Tuskegee, Ala.; Long Beach and Menlo Park, Calif.; Bay Pines, Fla.; Dublin, Ga.; Hines and North Chicago, Ill.; Danville and Fort Wayne, Ind.; Leavenworth, Kan.; Perry Point, Md.; Bedford, Brockton and Northampton, Mass.; Battle Creek, Mich.; Minneapolis and St. Cloud, Minn.; Fort Harrison, Mont.; Castle Point, N.Y.; Chillicothe and Dayton, Ohio; and Spokane and Vancouver, Wash.
Under the enhanced-use lease agreements, Veterans will receive senior and non-senior independent living and assisted living at eleven VA sites: Newington, Conn.; Augusta, Ga.; Marion, Ill.; Topeka, Kan.; Togus, Maine; Grand Island, Neb.; Big Springs and Kerrville, Texas; Salem, Va.; Martinsburg, W.Va.; and Cheyenne, Wyo.



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Here is some info I hope will be useful to you.

Just checking in with you Tally. Let's put your laptop to use... have you tried googling 9-1-1 United Way for your city? I did it for my city and found resources of all kinds, including housing. Also found where some charities offer bus tickets for where ever you want to go (go where the jobs are or where the VA housing is). I even found some in Vegas today for vets and let me tell you, the economy as far as jobs go, is like the worst in the country. If I wanted to, I could leave my sister's place and be in a studio apartment within 2 weeks. Are you willing to relocate to find where the housing is?

If nothing else, I'm also checking in to see if you are okay and to let you know someone cares even though we have never met face to face.