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#1
Oct 23, 2011, 10:03 PM
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I'm laying here watching tv. I'm thinking I can't do anything without someone knowing. I was going to take a med but they know how often I take them by how often I refill them. They know what I spend my money on. They know where I go. They know what's in my blood. They know there's something wrong with my brain. They know everything. They know what I do online. I cannot be free. I am not free. I can't get a job or talk to anybody without them knowing.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg  Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#2
Oct 23, 2011, 10:10 PM
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Moose, who are the "they"? They are different "they" from sentence to sentence, right?
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#3
Oct 23, 2011, 10:16 PM
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They. Someone. Always knows. They collective. I can't escape. They know even what I'm thinking right now. They know that I'm typing right now. And they know that my fish did not eat. And they know everything. Nothing is secret. And they will get me. They're always trying to get me.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#4
Oct 23, 2011, 10:21 PM
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Moose, what's happening? I'm trying to understand. It sounds like you are having some psychosis again, but I don't want to assume anything.
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#5
Oct 23, 2011, 10:27 PM
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I'm watching tv. But I just know someone is going to get me. They always are. I can't run . There is nowhere. I just KNOW. I have taken my meds. All. Never missed. And yet I am scared. I am watching a tv show and want to be one with it. Why are they after me? I can't run anywhere. Someone will find me. I want to break free.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#6
Oct 23, 2011, 10:27 PM
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Moose, someone indeed might know what you are typing because you may have spyware on your machine, but no one knows what you are thinking. Someone indeed knows what medications you are taking and what library books you are reading, but that someone is usually a computer, not a human person. If you believe that someone is knowing your thoughts, then, I agree with Anika, you need to be checked out, soon.
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#7
Oct 23, 2011, 10:34 PM
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Moose, I know it's a scary feeling ((((( Moose )))) do you have someone that can sit with you now, your bf maybe? I think you need to call your pdoc and let her know how you are feeling. Or even go to the er if you can. Can you try to distract your mind for a few minutes and try to focus on something else for a bit. When this happens to me I try to remind myself that it isn't possible. Sometimes that does help.
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#8
Oct 23, 2011, 10:37 PM
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I just.. don't want them to know. I just don't. I want to break free but everybody wants to know everything about me and yes my thoughts and I don't want them to know. I want to fly into the ether away from everybody knowing- everbody after me.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#9
Oct 23, 2011, 10:41 PM
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Everybody here is asleep. Nobody woud understasnd. PER is a joke they just say am I gonna kill myself. DBF would say to go to slleep.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#10
Oct 23, 2011, 10:48 PM
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Sometimes this happens to me too even if I take all my meds. Do you feel safeish right now? What is something you could do right now to try to take you mind off this, even for a bit? I sometimes try and do a puzzle, do you have anything like that? You can always keep talking to me too, I am up and I don't mind.
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#11
Oct 23, 2011, 10:53 PM
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Omg omg omg. I called PER. They are calling back after talkingn to the pdoc. I still feel the same. Omg. I need to get up and run or something;nn can't all the skunks are out. loll
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#12
Oct 23, 2011, 10:54 PM
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thank you thank you thank you! Ugh. I feel so bbouncy and weird and yet somehow safe. You and the person at PER are warm voices
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#13
Oct 23, 2011, 10:59 PM
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waiting. ... I'm so weird but it finally got to me that they are after me. It scares me. I can't deal. And I need to talk to opeople tomorrow on the phone and its not gonna be rfun.. Yes really real llife peop.e about unfun stuff. I want to eat pie and run away. Wheee!
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#14
Oct 23, 2011, 11:00 PM
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Good Moose I am really glad you made that call, no need to suffer this out. I just want you to feel and be safe. Lol maybe do some jumping jacks!! Let me know how it goes ok?
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#15
Oct 23, 2011, 11:01 PM
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Don't think about tomorrow till tomorrow ok? Everything will work it's way out. No need to stress about that right now.
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#16
Oct 23, 2011, 11:08 PM
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Had cereal. Nothing happened in the dark downstairs. Full at least.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#17
Oct 23, 2011, 11:09 PM
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Thank you thank you anika! So glad you're around for me latelly.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#18
Oct 23, 2011, 11:15 PM
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Aww Moose I am happy if I can help you out. Trust me I've been there , and I wished I had a place like this to come too. I'm glad It went good downstairs
 And that you ate, pie sounds good, doesn't it? Actually you're helping me right now too, helping me shift my own mind
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#19
Oct 23, 2011, 11:15 PM
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waiting on per.... I was happily listening to music. Then watching a tv show on space.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#20
Oct 23, 2011, 11:17 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#21
Oct 23, 2011, 11:20 PM
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There are 17 guest lurking right now.... Reading my thread! Take it down. Figure out who I am. Put it in a big files somewhere. Can't move without someone knowing...
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#22
Oct 23, 2011, 11:22 PM
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I watch the space channel sometimes. Right now I'm getting kids to bed, only 9:30 pm here. Then I get to relax. Yes do keep me posted, I'll be here.
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#23
Oct 23, 2011, 11:23 PM
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I think your post will be ok Moose, I bet the 17 guests are in search of help just like us.
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#24
Oct 23, 2011, 11:25 PM
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Quote:
hahahahahahahaha.... You're funny
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#25
Oct 23, 2011, 11:56 PM
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So no call.
 I did find out that my heartbburn med that my dr. said wouldn't do anything to the zyprexa is listed as lowering its effectiveness. I've been on both the whole time, though....
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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