Constantly missing my appointments and major thinking problems

I am always missing my app's. Today I missed two because I thought it was Tuesday, even after I looked at the calendar. Tomorrow is another important app for my daughter. I try my hardest to get it right. My memory and processing info is not the same especially after last episode.

Anyways now I feel this immense amount of guilt. One app today was one I rescheduled after missing it last week. Like how do I explain that one. It's making me so anxious. As I think these people will assume I am wasting their time or just dont care and it's the exact opposite. Even if their office calls I still forget somehow. Ughh anxiety, guilt, soo fun. Now I am totally afraid to call the one lady cause I don't know what to say

Any one else have these problems, I can't remember what I am doing minute to minute. I think something is not right. I am having serious cognitive difficulties. I also just realized maybe I am not ready for volunteer work if I can't remember the basics , like showing up.

I get that way. I use the calendar in my phone or iPod to remind me.

I am so anxious about missing appointments that I use my calendar at work, my phone calendar with reminders and my calendar at home. I am just a tad freaked about missing appts.

I miss appointments a lot. The week before last I didn't turn up for work twice because I actually forgot. (I got up, forgot I had to go there, and went back to sleep) My doctor had to up my antidepressants.

I forget silly things that don't seem like much, but mean a lot to me. I forget what a place looks like that I visit all the time. I forget yesterday, and by that I mean there's a big blank space where it should be, as if it didn't exist. Most distressing for me as a writer, I forget words, and suddenly just recently I can't spell. I've always been able to spell.

If I were a robot, it'd be like having an electronic brain with a superfast CPU, then suddenly finding it's been replaced with a clunky mechanical device. Even the simplest things take ages to work out, and sometimes the programs don't complete at all.

I'm so worried I asked my CPN if cognitive deterioration was a result of BP since I haven't noticed such a drastic change in previous depressions, and scarily he said that it could be.

I'm a writer too, Charlie_J, & I know what you mean about words. Sometimes there's a perfect one--& you just can't get it. Thank heaven for online thesauruses!

Medications can affect cognition too, which my statin drugs have done. Topamax fogs thought processes. Plus I have the gene for Alzheimer's (both g-mas & my dad had that). So when my mind fails me, I have to wonder: Which is out in front today?

I really believe that great nutrition, exercise, & mental stimulation at this point & on to the end of life can do a lot. I've seen it, in nursing homes, where I've volunteered. Don't worry, do stuff that helps. Read--those simple things I cited can really give you an edge.

But words & spelling, well, don't give up that dictionary!

I miss a lot more appointments at work and at the doctors offices than I used to. This and other problems processing information seems to be happening since taking all of these meds. I told my PDoc and she seems to think this is normal.

I was also told to just use a diary. My appointments are in my online diary, but I tend to forget tasks I was asked to do at work. And it can come across as being lazy, or non-performance

No, that's not it. I'm not talking about nuances of meaning or words on the tip of your tongue, that's quite different.

The other day I was doing a crossword (I do a lot of them because I think they help a bit), and for me I'll either know an answer or not, or be sure that I should and struggle to think of it.

Anyway, I came across this one clue, and the answer to it (I forget now, nothing scary, just forgot) was something stupid like "garment". I absolutely knew the answer, I could visualise it, but I spent five minutes saying things to myself like: "gartion, gartive, garnament," and I got really scared because it was just gone. As if my vocabulary is a dictionary in my mind, and the entries just keep disappearing.

I don't know how to explain it any clearer. It's a new thing for me and definitely not normal.

I can't remember appointments. I put them in my phone and it alerts me when I have to leave for the appointment. I actually got screwed up this week and went to an appointment at the right time, but 2 days early, wondering why the alarm on my phone didn't go off, fortunately it is in my phone correctly, so I will be alerted when I need to go.

I didn't like that my therapist saw me in the waiting room and laughed when she saw me, telling me I had the right time, but wrong day, I felt mocked. I was really feeling like crap, physically and mentally.

Once I showed up on correct day but a month too early...

Think they must have been worried cause pdoc actually saw me that day even after I offered to come back in a month. Worked out well though. Their reminder calls are life savers for me, most of the time...

Anika. I have a terrible sense of time. And yes, "even" looking at the calendar... me too. It can be sooo disconcerting. I have a calendar that is on the desk in front of the laptop. I cross off days, use highlighter around anything I have to go to and still miss stuff. Heck, it's not even unusual for me to be mentally off by months(!) Like others, I also use my cell phone and will set it for two times. One, "get up" or "get ready" and a second one for "actually go". Before I got in this habit, I'd keep thinking, "remember, remember, remember" over and over all day. Then shortly before that time, zooop! Totally space it. If the phone needs to wake me up, I also put a sticky on it to remember why it is going off. Yup.

I rarely know what day of the week it is (without checking anyway, and still can get mixed up).

Appointments. Have shown up wrong time, wrong day, wrong week. You name it. It's embarrasing, but... guess at least that it's not for lack of trying.
So, yeah... hear ya, Anika

(And I can't even blame meds, I've always been "time oblivious".)

Sometimes it feels like I'm living in a "time warp" when I have to check my phone more than once a day to remind myself what day it is! I keep a date book/calendar and write everything down in one place. Before I go to bed I confirm the date and see what's on the agenda for the next day. This week I almost missed my T-doc appt. because we agreed to move it from 1pm to noon on Tuesday's and I saw it marked but didn't pay attention to the new time. Anyway, I caught it and got there on time. My P-doc charges $75 for missed appts. and T-doc charges $50 so I can't afford to miss!

Okay, I get it. Now that I do, it does happen. Rarely, but it happens. Only recently. I hadn't registered it I guess but now will ask. It is very scary.

As I remember it's not a case of the word popping up a few minutes later, either.

I have been trying new meds for the past few months, tho none for long. Don't see how that could be it tho.