My happy bubble has been burst

I have just came out of a month and half depression and I have been feeling good-great for about a week and a bit.

Yesterday I fell out with my Mum and my parent's are not speaking to me. It was over something VERY trivial and I don't understand why I am the bad person in this situation but hey ho my parents are weird.

I think I need to move out. I think my time has come for me to leave the house again and this time NOT to return. I want to just go into my savings account and take out the money and go and get a flat. There are loads of flats for rent at the moment. I would get some sort of benefit cause I do not work so my council tax might be reduced etc. I spoke to my Sister about this and she thinks I should.

I am feeling miserable. I have been crying too. I just don't want to live somewhere, where I am made to feel like ****. My Dad hasn't even acknowledged me today. Its nearly 11pm and he has seen me since 10am today. My family is a joke. I am just pissed off, can you tell?

Then I have an acquaniance who is wanting out of her job. She noticed that my ex work are looking for people. She asked my opinion and considering she knows THEY SACKED ME ON ILL HEALTH GROUNDS...... I tell her not to do it but I did put a LOL at the end of the sentence. She asked me why.... GRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!

I am in such a mixed mood today, sorry for ranting and raving on here. I just can't talk to people in real life as no-one gets it or me and I just can't be arsed with people now a days. Ironically I was asked on Tuesday how I have been and I told my support worker I have been good. Which is true. Why does my mood change so quickly

I don't think this is a bipolar mood. I think you're probably overall stablish, and these external events in your life are causing you a lot of stress which makes you feel upset.

I think these feelings are normal and should be validated. Having a family who neglects the invisible illness would make ANYONE upset. If my family decided that my healthcare wasn't important anymore, I would be upset. Moving may be the best thing for you if it means you'll reduce the negativity. Then you can see your family on your OWN grounds and really control how much time you spend with them. (But remember, it's not good to totally isolate yourself)

Do you do any group work/activities? If you can't move out right away you may be able to do activities during the day which keep you away from the house.

Thanks Confusedinomicon,

I have activities on Mon and Tues but other than that, that's it. I know I need to do more and am wanting to do more but my anxieties get in the way.

My parents and I do not get on and this has been the case since I was a kid. We have a very up and down relationship. We can be fine for months then a huge argument/fallen out happens and then we are at loggers head. I try and not annoy anyone but I guess I am annoying? My Mum can be quite hurtful..... said the last argument that my depression was sheer self-fishness and that I should "snap" out of it. Bloody wish I could "snap" out of it. The funny thing is she hasn't seen my full blown depression ie suicidal tendancies etc she has seen just a tiny bit of it.

I don't know how to go about getting my own flat.... I lived with an ex colleague the last time. Think I might visit the Citizen's Advice Bureau next week

I cannot live with my parents. In my case it was more that my parent are over-concerned rather than unconcerned about my health. Any day that I was depressed, my mother would feel anxiety and try to "fix" me and some days I just wanted to be "allowed" to wallow in my depression.