[niko851]

<font color="#00088">Hi again my friends

I wanted to let you know I DID make it to my nursing accceptance interview by Xanax'ing my *** to death... Took a total of 4MG (2 bars) to get in the car (which I was a passenger - even worse) and get to the center. They had a panel of people who interviewd us.

The "head nurse", Ms. Callahan, did NOT even look at my academics in the least. I have held a 4.0 since HS and all any of them said was "oh wow - that is impressive". The BULK of the interview was about my phsyical and mental problems. The more they talked about it, the worse I got (aggitated, scared, the room began to close up, all that good ol' panic BS I have in addition to the BP and paranoid psychosis)....

I told them that this was a debilitating time for me, however my academics speak for themselves... Again, they shunned that and were more concerned if I was going to 'go off' on another student or possibly a patient or if I was going to be under control... They can't have a LOOSE CANNON in the classroom and certainly cannot have one on the floor of a SNF, AFC, or hospital setting...

So I do NOT think this went well at all, I'm VERY VERY upset that my medical life was the topic of conversation instead of my SUPERB academic record (sorry for saying this so much - it just pisses me right the hell off that this interview was nothing more than a slamming session). It put me into a panic attack where I asked to leave the room and she stopped and said "See - this is what we are talking about - you're not going to be able to handle this in your current state".... I again re-iterated that I am under strict medical care and that getting through this program is my ONLY chance of doing something with my life as I have not been able to work and I want to work despite filing for SSA. SSA is MOOT if I get through these 16 months of class and then I can take the State Boards to get licensed.

What happened to EEO or the equivalent? What right do they have to use my disability against me in this interview? DO they have a leg to stand on by 'pseudo-discriminating' by stating my disability is a hazard to the entire class and school? Are they currently treating me and/or have full knowledge of my diseases/disorders? Afterall, this panel consisted of all RN's with Master's... and all I got was the "you're scrwed up in the head" attitude - all becuase of me being HONEST with them... If I had lied and just said I was under the weather, they probably would have NEVER EVER known....

They want me to have a physical and psychological examination before 'fully' accepting me into the program... When I asked about clinicals, they said "lets see if you can handle the books first since you can't manage to even leave your house. This course has no tolerance for absences whether medically approved or not. If you miss, you're going to fail. If you do not do well, you're going to fail; if you cannot ACT LIKE A HUMAN BEING, YOU"RE GOING TO FAIL" I lost count on how many times the words/phrase "you're going to fail" was used - despite maintaining my 4.0 throughout my HS and college careers. Yes, I screwed up my last semster by dropping them all bcuz I could not concentrate, but this is changing my entire life by becoming an RN instead of being the Engineer that I already am. Hell if I could pass the 4 different "pre-entrance exams" and be invited to attend through the interview, I sure as hell did something right. I had the TOP scores out of 700 or so applicants. Yet they treated me SO unprofessionally that I could spit fire!!!!

I am in my right mind to go there today and speak with her agian one-on-one and tell her how I think she handled this interview... AND I'm going to poitn out how NONE - absolutely NONE - of my interview found out who/what I am academcially. Whether I am admitted or not, I still have to present how unprofessional and how discriminatory she behaved... It's just a shame.... I'm also going to point out that I don't care if this puts a hinder on my acceptance - the fact that I was degraded and torn a new one over my disorders was VERY - err IS VERY unprofessional and IMO, discriminating against someone who has a disability. Let me know if any of ya feel the same or any opinion.. You know me - I listen to all even if it is not what I want to hear or feel....

Glad to speak with everyone and hope all is well as it can be...... Keep in touch with me - you know where to find me!!!!
Hugs, Niko </font>

[darkeyes]

niko,
I just read some of this, but I have an appt. and must go so.
My nephew, had similar problem, wanted so badly to enlist in Air Force, he's extrememly intelligent,great in college,etc. but due to his schizophrenia DX, which came on in his teens, he was refused. He had friend who was ADHD, who also was turned down awhile ago. They use medication as prescribed and have done well, but had to change their future plans/school, so both are enrolled in college with major in computer/graphics, they do such cool stuff, even videos, stuff I can't even explain,I'm not computer savvy.
I do know though, his rejection by the service triggered him into a depression for a bit, his pdoc had to work really hard with him, but we are so happy he rebounded better than a few years ago with other stuff when he was first Dxed.
Hang in there, you'll hear from the others here, we allow venting, remember?

Take care,
DE

(((((((((( niko ))))))))))

[wi_fighter]

Niko, I'm angry for you. What kind of teachers are they to assume you're going to fail before you set one foot in a classroom? it almost sounds like they were trying to get you to explode or fall apart in front of them.

I'm really sorry that happened.

[BlueFaith]

This makes me angry!! I am completely shocked that you were treated in such an unprofessional manner... just downright mean if you ask me. I'm so sorry this happened to you. If it were me, I'd go have a chat with that head nurse, and let her know exactly how you feel you were treated. I'm just at a loss for words. It does seem like they were TRYING to set you off. You know I am here for you..

going to chat with that head nurse will only get you mired into more trouble..niko....getting into the nursing/medical field is hard. and they were wrong to not look at your academics. but it is possible that they had already looked and knew what a great student you are. being worried that you would "go off" in a nursing situation seems to be relevant. professionalism is just as important as grades. dealing with patients comes first.....because, if you have the grades to get in...then that is what they will look at...

could their response not been as severe as you think it was? niko, you're smart and you do want to go to nursing school. perhaps their responses looked worse to you, due to the good old butt biting disease of depression, etc.

how about letting it rest for a few days and regroup and decide what to do........those head nurses can really be ----- and don't like their authority to be questioned....i'm sure that she wasn't looking at you so much personally, as she was looking at your responses.

you know i'm here.......the PC gremlin ate my response to your PM........love, pat

[DaveyJones]

Niko,

My ex is quite bipolar, but holds an RN, a position of MAJOR trust and responsibility at a major hospital, and is starting her clinicals for her MSN. Her employer is quite aware of the situation, the health system insurance even sent her to one of the best mental health clinics on the planet for 5 weeks a while back (her department's medical advisor even had to approve the hospitalization).

I might ask, how did the topic of your health come up? I don't think they have the rigtht to ask these questions. (But of course, I'm not an attorney).

I would say, don't freak out...don't give up. On the practical side, you may want to transfer to another program--these folks will be gunning for you now, I'm afraid. You don't need that kind of pressure. If you want to stay, you'll probably need a lawyer...but that won't make things any more pleasant!

Good luck, I hope things work out OK--you're too smart and too good-hearted not to be helping others!

DJ

[niko851]

<font color="#00088">Hey Pat -

To answer your questions, I've copied/pasted them in this note and my responses follow them:

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
going to chat with that head nurse will only get you mired into more trouble..niko....getting into the nursing/medical field is hard. Yes, you're damn right it is hard.. The interesting part is that my acceptance has already been 'accepted' and the interview was just a 'going through the motions' type ordeal. I took the entrance examinations and I passed with VERY excellent scores.

and they were wrong to not look at your academics. but it is possible that they had already looked and knew what a great student you are. They requested us to bring our transcripts bcuz they have not looked at them already. They were needed for the interview so they could get an 'overview' of our past performances academically. So no, it is HIGHLY unlikely that they had a shred of our academics when they did not have access to them without us bringing them on the day of the interview.

being worried that you would "go off" in a nursing situation seems to be relevant. TOTALLY AGREE!!! This is why i'm so stuck between a rock & a hard place.... My own honesty has caused WAYYYY too much of this drama and if I just lied and said I was nothing wrong with me, I guarantee that things probably would have gone differently

professionalism is just as important as grades. dealing with patients comes first.....because, if you have the grades to get in...then that is what they will look at...

could their response not been as severe as you think it was? Thought about this one too... However, given I had my two roomates/friends there, they have more/less 'vouched' for my take on the situation. The three of us cannot be wrong; I was the brunt of some 'mockery' session bcuz of my honesty w/my disorders.

niko, you're smart and you do want to go to nursing school. perhaps their responses looked worse to you, due to the good old butt biting disease of depression, etc. I agree again hun... While I'm in a HUGE low right now, chances are I am taking this harder than I should be. However, Erin feels the same way I do and she does not suffer from anything like we do. It just impacted me alot more than it did to them so to speak.

how about letting it rest for a few days and regroup and decide what to do........those head nurses can really be ----- and don't like their authority to be questioned....i'm sure that she wasn't looking at you so much personally, as she was looking at your responses. Sounds like a good deal to me, pending I have nothing better to do... It would probably be best to let it 'rest' for some time before I go in with both-barrels so to speak!!!

you know i'm here Same here darlin.... I'm here for you as well and will do whatever I can to help you as well - Niko

.......the PC gremlin ate my response to your PM........love, pat

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"></font>

[LILITH]

I agree with DJ, Niko, I have been a nurse for over 35 years.. I have held positions of high responsibility I did ICU/CCU for a lot of my career. I went on to be supervisor, asst. director of Nursing and Directory of Nursing.... I was also a Clinical Instructor for 4th year medical students.. I have a history of SA, I have DID, PTSD and major depression. I was one of the most sought after Nurse in my area. With all of my diagnosis I was able to perform at what I was hired to do. LET NOTHING STAND IN YOUR WAY OF GOING WERE YOU WANT TO GO!
How did they find out about you past medical and psychological past. Change your school options.
Do not let this one bad experience deter you from your goals in life.
Lilith

[cherybery]

Niko, I am a nurse as well and also have friends who are nurses who have mental illnesses. I am at a lost about how they came upon asking you about your psych. I don't know but it sounds on the side of discrimination. I am with Lilith, LET NOTHING STAND IN YOUR WAY.

[DaveyJones]

Heck, the cynic in me says that you MUST be mentally ill to even want to be a nurse, anyway! *kidding*

What the last two ladies said...if you want it that bad, do it!

DJ

[niko851]

<font color="#00088">Lilith/DJ/all -

You know what part stands out the most? the part wehre you wrote "LET NOTHING STAND IN MY WAY"... Talk about hitting it where it counts!!!!

You know what my TEAS and PSB's look like? They top the charts - and I'm not stating this just to have glamour and praise either. This is a HUGE accomplishment that both Erin (my brother's fiance) and I have. Our academics are superb; I held a 4.0 until Winter 2005 when everything in my life went downhill... Erin has a 3.8 (oh - mine went to a 3.93)...

So from an academic stand-point, we've kicked some u know what and deserve better. I think we're just 'too good' for that place and they did not want to come out and say it.....

SO - my searching (err - 're' searching) quest must commence.. There are MANY MANY options out there and this is only one of them.. If we're really 'too good', then again, I'd say we deserve to be somewhere better -that is for sure!!!

.... and this is why I wonder how/why I am in such a low... adding stuff like this into the equation CERTAINLY does not lift anyone's spirits.... and even with my disorders [Lilith], you're PROOF POSITIVE that this CAN be done as you've held high-ranking positions within the nursing field.

I'm VERY impressed with your credentials by the way!!!! Would you like to do some "one on Two" type instructing so we don't have to attend a school

Thank you all again - and take care ~Niko</font>

[Merlin]

Niko,

I wonder, if you want to continue disclosing your bipolar, if you could get your T or pdoc to write a letter to the schools you apply to, notifying them that you are capable, psychologically of doing the job. Having that note makes it difficult for them to claim you will fail in the position, since your doctor disagrees and knows you so much better.

[darkeyes]

Great reply. Niko, give getting a letter a try, it can't hurt, eh?
Lots of luck with this matter.

DE

i just remembered something...i worked with doctors, in ER, who are totally certifiably crazy. i saw it and i heard it. one in particular really needed hospitalization.

i'm still puzzled about them asking about your health. i've had pee tests and background checks, but never have i been asked about my health.

you deserve your dream. try another school..........xoxoxo pat

[LILITH]

Sure I would...... you will do just fine..... I am pulling for you.......