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#1
Sep 24, 2012, 10:45 AM
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so desperately i want to relax....and writing this as my leg shakes as usual and my neck is so tense holding up shoulders that really only need to hang arms off.
cannot just let things slide....I'm a control freak in an existence I cannot control....no matter how tense I am and alert and no matter how much my leg dances all by itself. I can't control anything....but I act like I can somethin' inside my being is so determined....but whatever it is?... it just stresses me out! ...I just wish I never felt hyper-abilities...ever! then wouldn't expect so much....when it just aint there and just let it all go instead |
 BlueInanna, kindachaotic, missbelle
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#2
Sep 24, 2012, 11:22 AM
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It does sound like you need I let go the first start of that is realizing you can't control the world only your reactions to it and sometimes not even those. I hope you get to feeling less tense today. Maybe some hot tea would help? That always helps me just a suggestion.
__________________
“When everything seem to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it ....” ― Henry Ford lamictal 200mg, synthroid 75 mcg, Testosterone injections thanks to lithium causing thyroid problems |
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#3
Sep 24, 2012, 11:58 AM
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I'm sorry your feeling so bad today.
__________________
Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
| Anonymous32912
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#4
Sep 24, 2012, 12:06 PM
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it's exhausting trying to keep thinkin' about good things...
than instead just accepting they aint so good. (sorry for the downer Migs....and thanks  )
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| missbelle
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#5
Sep 24, 2012, 01:53 PM
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hey Monkeymonkey~
Sorry you are feeling this way. We can't control a lot of things. Enjoy thing things you can. (Like posting, what tv shows to watch, which movie to see....  )
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
| Anonymous32912
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#6
Sep 24, 2012, 02:08 PM
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i dont have any bright ideas at the moment
 just hugs
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| Anonymous32912
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#7
Sep 24, 2012, 02:11 PM
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There is very little we can control. We can control our diet but can't control if we get sick........my signature says it all and practicing acceptance is hard to do. You may not be an alcoholic but the steps of AA are so good. I used to go to Al-anon and the things I learned in the rooms helped me a great deal to handle my depression and anxiety. I was always a type A personality but I sure am not now...at least I certainly hope not. I am older then you and I have had more time to practice acceptance and that I am not in control of anything. How bad I always wanted to control events and people. I just could not understand why no one would listen to me as I always knew what is best.....Yeah right!!
"I will remind myself.....that I am powerless over anyone else or anything else,that I can live no life but my own. Changing myself for the better is the only way I can find peace and serenity."
__________________
Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich The road to hell is paved with good intentions. "And psychology has once again proved itself the doofus of the sciences" Sheldon Cooper 
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| Anonymous32912
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