T is out of town (Help ME!)

Well my T is out of town for her family and had to cancel my appointment, and I couldnt get one last week for the same reason. Ive been looking forward to this appointment as I am having a bit of trouble and need some help, and my family is oblivious to it. I have been cutting for three days Ive been putting on a happy face I thought nothing was wrong with me. Turns out there is. Its like being in a war with no backup support. What should I do I dont know how Im gonna handle this I have to wait another week and that will probably be canceled Idk what to do Im so flustered. Help me PC!

I'm here for you dude!..

And I for you monkey man. It just things keep getting worse its like im happy im ok and i just keep rolling down hill im getting back to hurting myself things are getting bad.

thanks Clinte...

I'm just as much guessing my way through this crazy life as you are mate!

and what have we got inside but chaos!?

....and what we got outside is each other.

this is much more reliable....perfectly reliable

I'm finding this out just now....lets make use of it brother

self harm is the inside coming out

with us...."the inside is bigger than the space available for it"

the outside .....our body does it's best to contain the inside...

I understand "wanting" to hurt it...

cos the "two are connected"

hang in there buddy

Clinte, sorry it's getting rough.

I have no advice for self harm except distraction, or trying to get the feelings out in a different way, I am sorry. But we're here to listen and be here for you.

Did you check in the self harm forum. I hope you find something else that can help you out of this a bit till you can see your T.

Well my inside must be pretty pissed I've cut about 40 slits on my arm and each time I stop I go back and let the blood run down my are once again. I need to stop I'm gonna mess up eventually. How do I stop destroying myself. I'm supposed to do homework done by tonight but I can't do it. I already posted over there a few days ago but no real help unfortunatly.

ok!

time to stop it Clinte.

homework can wait seriously it can

what you wanna do right now is go wash your arm in some nice warm water in the sink with some soft soapy sh.t and bandage up ok!....wrap your arm up in fresh white anything and sit down in the quiet and hold your poor arm close to you and hug it mate....ok!

your arm has always been there for you....so now you gotta be there for it..

Please put all sharp objects away, in a place that makes it hard to get to. Jump on the chat and hang out until your beyond sleepy then go to bed. Tomorrow please call your pdoc, they can help too.

Clinte....where are you...

are you ok?

Ok peeps thanks for the help and advice I cleaned my arms up and they don't hurt as bad now. Ill call the doc tomorrow cause idk what's going on. I'm not overly anything but I'm sinking.

Good Clinte, ya your pdoc can help too. You did a good thing, baby yourself a little, and keep you mind busy with something else. Make sure you take care of those wounds.

Hang in there

very cool

yeah sinking really sux

you are gonna be ok buddy and even when not it's ok to be ok about it...

sinking sux yep...

any idea what triggered you?....sent you spinning sideways?

No idea I wish I knew that's why I really need my therapist to help me with that. The only thing I can think is stress from school. I haven't really left my bed on days trying to do homework and its just not happening I may just turn it in partially done

poor bugger you under pressure!

expecting somethin' from ya'self and knowing how mentally supreme you are and "screwin' it up!"

"damn rip shreds off me"

you under pressure Clinte

partially done is fine who has the right to judge any effort we make ....you made

you are making....

some cliches just piss me right off!...like...

"hey you done your best!"

I make up new ones...

"hey I done my worst!" ....still pretty damn good...maybe even better

makes more sense sometimes

you still there Clinte?....you ok?

One thing you can do... and it may sound strange... but rub the area you want to cut really hard with your finger... use it like a knife and rub really hard till it hurts. No scratching or fingernails, its something that Haas worked for me before

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Is there any one you trust to come and help you?

A friend you trust? (A LOT)!

Thanks ladies and gents I'm ok and nothing bad has happened no worries. Thanks Dan ill try that it sounds like it might work. And canacrip I don't really have friends who have time for me and my shinanagins. I imagine tey wouldn't really care anyway. thanks everyone for talkin to me. Today's going to be hard so ill be here today.

ah!...the man is back

very cool..

love you mate...be cool or be cool about being not cool!



either way hey?....clinte is cool

Thanks jamesy your a good pal. Your quite cool yourself even if we can't keep cool. Haha

I caught this conversation really late... sorry about that! I've been real busy.

I know that for me the urge to cut was significantly reduced once I was on anti anxiety meds! Is there any way to get some of those from Pdoc, or to up the ones that you currently have, assuming that you are on some of those. Anxiety is a killer when it comes to this, and it can feed the urge like crazy! But least of all, please, I'm not encouraging you, but please make sure you only use sterile blades. The kinds of infections that you can get by using a dirty blade, ooohhh, they're the kind that no one would ever want!

Be safe, and have you ever heard of the butterfly project. It's simple and it's put on my our local state university here. ASU.

The rules are simple. instead of cutting, you draw a butterfly, or whatever pic that you want on the area that you want to cut in pen. You can draw it or someone else can draw it and even put their name under it.

Now, the butterfly or whatever you draw lives on your skin until it completely fades away, and if you cut, you kill the butterfly or whatever it is until you drew.

So... the point is, don't kill the butterfly! You can't cut until the pic has completely, 100 percent faded away!

The point is, is that it identifies the problem to others that care about you and they should see the pics fading and put on a new one, all the while you are telling yourself, "maybe tomorrow" over and over again, time would pass and you would go lengths of time without cutting.

Hope some of this helps.

Thanks dan ill check into something from my pdoc some Prn or something. cause I think that would help. Ill also try the project and see how it goes. Im just really angry now i just wanna pop. I just got done punching the granite, not really hurting myself though. Im just mad today and at the same time feel the need to cry but cant idk wtf is wrong with me.

there aint nuthin' wrong with you Clinte....!!

sure somethin is wrong but it aint you buddy....

it's just a damaged sensation....