[Faraway tree]

My good news is that I went back to the psychiatrist and am on drugs that have made me perfectly stable bipolar wise provided I take them right on schedule. If I take them later than usual I find myself sobbing away then remember and feel like a bit of a dork. But because the crazy is only just under the service I don't feel flat or anything. I've been completely stable mood wise, aside from anxiety for maybe seven or eight weeks now, which is a miracle for me, and I never actually thought it was possible.

The thing I'm finding hard is making myself ok again. The me under this all. I feel like getting so down again and again, and then popping up and doing things I don't normally do and embarrassing myself with no break has left the me underneath so broken and I'm not sure how to fix it. My confidence has never been so low.

And I feel silly. I've been seeing a psychologis and a psychiatrist and this just hasn't come up, and I haven't really told anyone except my best mate. I just can't seem to pick myself up again, and I'm not depressed but I am certainly not happy. It sux.

Anyway, I'm not sure what the point of that little spiel was, I just needed to get it off my chest. Has anyone managed to fix themselves up a bit after the initial "recovery" symptom-wise? Or is this just par for the bipolar course?

[Trippin2.0]

For me, it was all about finding the me beneath the diagnosis. When I rediscovered Ophelia, I fell inlove with her, and now I try to embrace her,all of her, all of the time... Idk how I did it exactly, but it took alot of self-discovery, and getting to know myself again. I hope that makes sense, maybe you can broach this subject with your psychologist and she can start you on the correct path. Think I would have found me alot sooner with some guidance, so I'm sure it can only help to bring it up...

[Faraway tree]

Hmmm I think I might bring it up with her.

I think I might go home for a while and take some time to rediscover myself again. Good advice, thanks

[Trippin2.0]

Its only a pleasure glad you find it helpful From my experience, home is a good place to start as roots and memories are always helpful... At one point I went through my old journals, favourite music of long ago,memorabilia, it really helped with getting re-aquainted. I hope it helps you too

[mark25624]

Stay active!!!
Go for (or back) to the things you love(ed).
I believe that the mind does need to keep busy.
Don
t expect changes to come overnight.
It all takes time.

[BlackPup]

Definitely. It took me a while to feel confident again and happy. You can't go through a bipolar episode and expect it to be back to normal straight away. You need time to recover so be kind to yourself. Keep in touch with your pdoc and T and keep posting.