extremely bad

faerie_moon_x · Dec 11, 2012, 10:02 AM

Can't talk today.

BlueInanna · Dec 11, 2012, 12:28 PM

Big hugs, hang in there please xoxo

Anika. · Dec 11, 2012, 12:37 PM

Aww DH, it will be ok... hang in there. We can listen quietly to your silence.

And still be here when you can talk.. I hope you are ok.

Bipolar mom · Dec 11, 2012, 12:40 PM

hope things are okay with you....

Trippin2.0 · Dec 11, 2012, 01:00 PM

>>>>>>Sitting close by in comfortable silence sis<<<<<<

Its going to be ok again, it will, love you lots lady

Dec 11, 2012, 02:19 PM

hope you feel better soon.

praying for you (or what ever you need)

hamster-bamster · Dec 11, 2012, 02:23 PM

We are always here for you, just as you, for us.

Dec 11, 2012, 02:47 PM

no that one well...

Cocosurviving · Dec 11, 2012, 05:31 PM

Don't give up. We all have hours, days and months that are hard. Know that we're thinking abt u.

~Christina · Dec 11, 2012, 06:02 PM

Know we are here.

Clinte89 · Dec 11, 2012, 06:15 PM

Here for you. I hope you get feeling better soon. Just hang in there.

hamster-bamster · Dec 11, 2012, 06:29 PM

Bad things have happened or do you feel extremely bad - which one?

Anika. · Dec 11, 2012, 10:09 PM

I hate bringing up meds DH, but are you back to drinking water and back with the lithium? The start and stop I am sure probably didn't help to much maybe.. I hope it gets better fast!!

Seaswept · Dec 11, 2012, 10:19 PM

Hope you're doing okay darkheart

Clinte89 · Dec 12, 2012, 09:59 AM

Hope your doing better today dh. Get well soon.

faerie_moon_x · Dec 12, 2012, 10:44 AM

I have a mix of issues happening at the moment. Too much. I am not taking my lithium yet, I get paid Friday. I just need a water bottle that won't spill if the baby is trying to take it and drink from it. I know that sounds stupid.

I am really confused and not well. I am having some pretty sever paranoia. I have this really, really strong feeling that something is going on. People are against me, I can feel it. I feel watched, like remotely or something. I feel very suspicious. It's hard to articulate exactly what I'm feeling / thinking at the moment... this was going on when I was on the lithium, by the way, I don't think that's what is causing it. It started a few weeks ago. I can't explain it. I'm trying to be rational. I just feel attacked and stress on Monday night exploded it really bad. Yesterday was bad until evening, then it got better a little.

Then, I know that I'm changing back into something. I can't explain exactly what that means. I know I've started causing all the street lights to burn out again. The other day I was on the highway and I burned out every light on both sides as I approched them. This is very distressing. Both sides of the road. It makes it so hard to see. I don't have really good night vision. This used to happen to me a lot a long time ago when I was very powerful. But not to this extent. So I don't know if my subconcious is preparing for something.

Anyway, I feel like I am not making sense.

Clinte89 · Dec 12, 2012, 11:08 AM

Ouch paranoia really sucks bad. I'm sorry your going through such a rough time.

Trippin2.0 · Dec 12, 2012, 11:39 AM

((((((DHX)))))) I'm here for you, have you told hubby what is happening? I think that you need to confide in somone IRL, it will help you feel safer and hopefully decrease the paranoia. I'm here if you want to talk

wish I could be there with you to help you through this

BlueInanna · Dec 12, 2012, 02:37 PM

To control the electricity charges, I do a quick meditation picturing an actual switch, where I just can turn off the energy. Otherwise I'm blowing out lightbulbs in my house and living in the dark cuz I'm sick of replacing them. Do you know about Kundalini yoga, Kundalini energy blowouts? You could have old blockages that are trying release. Are you having any back pain? Hope I don't freak you out, I just totally relate to the electrical stuff, and it used to scare me so bad - but now I understand it.

Seaswept · Dec 12, 2012, 02:47 PM

...the streetlight thing happens to me too. As I am driving down the highway lights will go out just as I pass... several in a row..weird thought it was just me. Also electrical stuff in the house, like if the tv clicks or other electrical noises- I feel a charge through my body. Have tried to explain it to others... they think I'm nuts.

Anyway, feeling paranoid is awful, I hope it passes and you feel better soon.

Anika. · Dec 12, 2012, 03:12 PM

your not nuts, that kind of stuff happens to me too. For almost an entire year I couldn't touch my computer with out it makeing a big shock sound inside and turning off, other people could use it no problem. I never put the light thing together tho..

I have a lot fo problems with all my electrical appliances and outlets. The last three houses I have lived in at least half if not more of the outlets in the wall stop working shortly after I moved in. My small electric appliances just don't work, They are ok for a while and then all of a sudden you go to plug them in and there is no power to them, they just will not turn on. I have replaced soooo many things, vacuums, hair dryers, mixers, cell phones, lamps, toasters, microwaves... I would think nothing of it if it were just some items some once in a while, but it's all the time.

like Trippin asked did you talk to your husband DH, what about seeing your dr, maybe the lithium isn't really doing it's job very well for you.

faerie_moon_x · Dec 12, 2012, 04:32 PM

Thanks I have talked to him some but not all. He is so logical. I get scared sometimes he will think I'm "crazy" and like... not love me any more.

I will talk to him some more. Next time he is with me with the lights I will point it out.

But, the light thing scares me not because it is happening exactly. But it's what was happening to me before when I was having my really big problem with that people were out to get me. Like that big, big one. I used to have the lights turning off on me like that and that is when I believed I was extremely powerful...