...spinning out of thoughts can't think of much apart from how uncomfortable IT all is..

I hate this place...but thats no revelation..!

..I hate most things...and it's more than just a dislike I'm a dispicable human fed up and overwhelmed by a perception of things tainted by bitterness...there is an optimism I resist with my life I have done.

...damaged inside the head I only care about me and even that I screw up!

whats the point?...and on I go...and these things I share are forgotten immediately and the 'buzz' of globalising my insecurities wears off suddenly too...

I hate this online world it's so damn intrusive privately exposed randomly dumb!.....

am I expected to sit at this keyboard all day and night to communicate to people I will never f-cking meet?

I just get off thinking I know the answers to your stupid problems...as stupid as mine are....and neither of them are stupid in reality..

but this aint reality...

this is the dumbest way to communicate I never knew...it's hard enough face to face and I try to do this??

I must be the stupidest dickhead on my side of the planet!

just be glad you will never meet me.

I'm not a freaking monkey!

I'm a person

[pegasus]

Hi James! Yeah I know what you mean. I'm a horse with wings duh! We are all a bunch of saddos sitting in front of our laptops/computers frantically typing to who the hell who! But I have to find others like me, others that understand and there just doesn't appear to be any freaks like me in real life. Sooooooo here we are!

i for 1 am glad we've got each other

if i didon't have you guys.. who knows where i'd be

[~Christina]

James, Your a person to me

[BlueInanna]

I don't hate you, but I hate me and most things and I hate how I hate. And I'll prob change my mind in an hour and love everything, maybe hopefully.

[tc2012]

Originally Posted by dubblemonkey

...spinning out of thoughts can't think of much apart from how uncomfortable IT all is..

I hate this place...but thats no revelation..!

..I hate most things...and it's more than just a dislike I'm a dispicable human fed up and overwhelmed by a perception of things tainted by bitterness...there is an optimism I resist with my life I have done.

...damaged inside the head I only care about me and even that I screw up!

whats the point?...and on I go...and these things I share are forgotten immediately and the 'buzz' of globalising my insecurities wears off suddenly too...

I hate this online world it's so damn intrusive privately exposed randomly dumb!.....

am I expected to sit at this keyboard all day and night to communicate to people I will never f-cking meet?

I just get off thinking I know the answers to your stupid problems...as stupid as mine are....and neither of them are stupid in reality..

but this aint reality...

this is the dumbest way to communicate I never knew...it's hard enough face to face and I try to do this??

I must be the stupidest dickhead on my side of the planet!

just be glad you will never meet me.

I'm not a freaking monkey!

I'm a person

Hey, I know I can't help you but you sound like my son who is BP I never know what to say to him. So I tell him that this will pass and I say that bc i belevie it to be true. He says stuff like you say when he is depressed. He gets very depressed about technology. He recently quit his job bc he worked for Verizon selling phones.

I hope you feel better soon. Really I do.

[rossiv46]

I feel like that a lot too.

Well, hi, Dubble Monkey.

Glad to see you're home safe and trying to hit the middle of things. That duck of
yours is a winner and so effectively used.

Take care of yourself and have a Happy New Year.

Gen

thanks for the feedback everyone...

I swear if I don't find myself soon I'm gonna crack up more than ever.

feel like I've got 'personality dementia'

...there is nuthin' real inside to grip onto.
it's doin' my head in..I feel bad all the time about just everything....

and the only things that I understand are anger and absurdity and foolishness.

I'm so sick of feeling guilty about being a dickhead!

[wildchild r]

hey Dobblemonkey, sounds like the snakes in your head are working double shifts,,question is, how dose one overcome them?? I think by not giving the thoughts power over you..
I struggle with it everyday..Im gonna be a fighter! I try to replace a negetive thought with a positive one no matter how long it takes to search one out or make one up!
I dont like being me, but for some reason other people do,along with my nasty snappy reactions.
You are cared for,you are not dispicable, as you said u r a human, not a monkey..and BTW, monkies have feelings too

I've tried reading the Spiritual Exercises of Ignatious Loyola. (It's on the net.) That
has been so helpful for me lately.

Take care, James.

Gen