[spoiltmom]

How do you guys handle your daily to do lists, like laundry, cooking, cleaning.

Some days I just cannot find the motivation to do it and the more housework that piles up the harder it is to do.

How to you handle this and stay on top of it???

Well, I doubt that anyone really handles it remarkably, except someone who has an
obsession about housecleaning. I never did like it, but did it because I wanted my
home clean and fresh. Still don't like it, but do it because of desire to have things
in order and clean. (Am not obsessive about it at all, but get a little nervous if
things go much longer than 4 or 5 days.)

Never could go with 1, 2, or 3 things a day. Had to do it all on the same
day just for orderliness. Ridiculous, I know, but we all have our thing about housekeeping. Did try that on occasion, however, when feeling tone was low.

Now, cooking is something else. I did my share of that when rearing our child and
caring for my husband. As a retiree, I love eating out in restaurants that serve
fresh vegetables, salads, etc. That I really enjoy.

[hamster-bamster]

I am hiring cleaners because I came to the conclusion that I cannot handle cleaning. I can only handle cooking and decluttering to prepare the area for cleaners. People who have cleaners say that it helps their sanity and I am hoping for the same for me. I will save on everything I can - no Starbucks, buying food in bulk, buying generic food, no farmers' market, comparison shopping, no manicures, and whatever else I can cut out just to be able to pay the cleaners.

I do love to cook so I enjoy inviting people over and cooking for them. I do not cook much for myself, and this is how I handle eating at home alone:

- rotisserie chicken from the grocery store or Costco (kills two birds because my cats enjoy it as well) regularly
- steam-in-the bag frozen vegetables that you can microwave without any mess - one the the best technological inventions as of recently, in my mind
- microwave steamer - a plastic contraption I bought for $7 in a drugstore a number of years ago, in which I cook asparagus and frozen artichoke hearts and then eat both with olive oil - little mess, tasty, and very healthy
- low sodium chicken broth and I heat and drink

Rotisserie chicken should work for you even better than for me since you have several people to feed. If they like it, of course.

Post what your family likes to eat and we will come up with ideas on how to simplify your cooking.

[hamster-bamster]

There are now dozens of different packages of steam-in-the-bag veggies. I only buy broccoli, cauliflower, brussels sprouts, and asparagus, without sauce, because I cannot stand the ones with sauce as they are too salty for me - I was brought up without any salt, by my mother who had malfunctioning kidneys. If you like your food saltier, you can try buying various of those vegetable-based meals to see if you and your family like them.

There is also a very fine cookbook author, Barbara Kafka, who has a book titled "The Microwave Gourmet". I do not have the book but one day I will get it and use it. I have used other books by Barbara and found them outstanding. Microwaving is also the cheapest way to cook your food, in terms of energy expenditure, and I would like that.

[spoiltmom]

Hamster, you sound a lot like me. I can find the energy to pick up everything but not doing the sweeping, mopping, vacuuming etc. OR if someone else picks up everything then I can find the motivation to do the vacuuming,mopping, sweeping. I just can't find the energy to do BOTH. We have 3 kids so there are always toys everywhere and tons of things to put away before the real cleaning even begins.

[bpinOk]

For me its all about communicating with my wife what I get done and what else needs to be done... Early on in our marriage there would be days that I couldn't.do anything and would cause tension.. To which I would respond either anger or sink deeper

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by spoiltmom

Hamster, you sound a lot like me. I can find the energy to pick up everything but not doing the sweeping, mopping, vacuuming etc. OR if someone else picks up everything then I can find the motivation to do the vacuuming,mopping, sweeping. I just can't find the energy to do BOTH. We have 3 kids so there are always toys everywhere and tons of things to put away before the real cleaning even begins.

Yes, I can see myself OCCASIONALLY mopping. Last time I poured myself a glass of French red wine to make mopping the tiles in my kitchenette easier. It worked! What a discovery.

Vacuuming - not, for the life of me, not. Somehow it is the most dreaded task for me.

Another thing is (and you can probably relate to it), when things are sort of OK, I can make them 100% OK, but if things are horrible and I need an effort to go from 0 to a 100, I cannot. On the upside, this makes me hopeful that when the cleaners start coming in regularly for deeper cleaning, I would have enough motivation to wipe the range and counters and the sinks in-between their visits.

[rossiv46]

I do most of the cleaning as my wife is very messy and the kids to help either. I pick up daily but today is the first time in over a week that I'm doing more like vacumming and mopping. I hate house work but I hate leaving it dirty. I just have to power thru it.

[bunnifoo]

I live by myself so I have to do it all and I can't afford someone to come in and clean. My boyfriend is willing to help but I hate asking him all the time to help with housework. I don't have a dishwasher either so I'm never on top of all of my chores.

This past year when things were really bad I realized that seeing dirty dishes and trying to cook and wash all the dishes was adding stress. So I stopped cooking, I bought paper plates and plastic ware and ate a lot of frozen foods. Frozen meatballs mixed with frozen pasta and veggies, frozen chicken strips, lots of soup, granola bars. Things like that.

Somedays if I picked up for five minutes or put 3 things away that was a win for me.

[wildchild r]

Ive been terribe\le about housework, get basics done, neglect details, and end up overwhelmed
.I try to muster up the attitude to big girl up and handle my business,and the motivation sometims works.mostly not.I give myself praise for what i have achieved,If I allow myself, and it helps.One can only do what his mind has limited itself to do.
For myslef, beating myself up is a flaued trait, however, Im getting better at giving myself a break.
I hope I can continue to make myself believe this more often,
I hope what Ive shared has brought someone relief..

[Lil Ant Lady]

I go on cleaning binges!

I can't face it some days but other days I get up and it's tidy, mop, Hoover, sponge down, all in one go!!

[Confusedinomicon]

I break up chores and do them in two days every 2 weeks. Thats the average time it takes for the apartment to get sufficiently dirty.

[Yoda]

I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again. —Joan Rivers

[Anika.]

I used to be really really obsessive with cleaning. That was pretty much all I did all day, every day. I did recieve therapy for that, and I don't know. It's made it hard to stay motivated. Now I have a job cleaning and on my days off don't really feel like doing it.

I have 3 kids too, no hubby. But I have always gotten them to pick up their things. Tho yes they still track dirt in and stuff like that. They are also responsible for keeping their rooms clean, helping take out trash, sweeping the floors etc. Problem I have is when they are not watching I "fix" it cause they are really not as picky as me, and I don't want to teach them to be.

In the morning I always make a list. Group things that I can multi task, and number the tasks in order to do. Put on some music or background noise I like. Think about how good it will feel to get it done. And then I use my time cleaning practising being mindful or something that will benefit me. Yup I like multi tasking. For me that is a really good time to work on midfulness.. A perfect time for my mind to go anywhere and everywhere and a lot of places that are not now, and don't need going to.

I know it can be hard to motivate ourselves. But I usually feel pretty good once I get going ~ if I go in with a good mindset. If I go in thinking " I really don't want to, I hate this, I am too tired .. etc. " it really will be awful and not get done.

My yoga teacher tonight said " be careful what you think because your thoughts become reality " I have heard that before but needed reminded tonight. I'd say that is spot on. Maybe being aware of your thoughts might help you feel more motivated?

[~Christina]

Unless I am in a fetal position in bed from my pain.. my house is always being cleaned. It's not fun to be obsessed by cleaning that's for sure.

On cooking, it is all or nothing. Day-in day-out cooking gets a great big "UGH!", and people would do well not to not count on it coming from me. Because they're not going to get it! It's erratic. But sometimes I really get going and make everything at once. Soooo, that one I can't tell you how to handle well.

Laundry, I just do it. I have a limited quantity of clothes. That helps. Because I greatly prefer not to run out of underwear.

Now... cleaning. A subject near and dear.
If deeply depressed, I don't even see a mess. Or give a damn if I do. Most of the time though, it's good -- quite tidy and clean. Because I like it that way. It is not at all unusual for me to really get into cleaning even when not hypo. (When hypo, it gets ridiculous really.)It's like a hobby (and was once a business). It's also something I do when I'm nervous or avoid doing something that I'm supposed to be doing. The "enjoy" it part isn't so much in the doing (except feeling productive) as in the result. Looove basking in a good result. They say I sometimes go overboard. It's worth it. And if it takes Q-Tips, toothbrushes and dental tools to get there, so be it.

Step one: Get yourself some OCD. (I'm totally making a joke there. I have it, and though it plays into this, it's not like the misconception that neat freak= OCD. It's much more complicated. And annoying.)

Ok, now for the actual tips (how I handle it, not how to get motivation, sorry!)
1) Maintenance. It is waaaaaay easier to hit stuff here and there than to feel one must tackle it all at once. (And having that feeling of being immobilized and overwhelmed.) Where is that rule? See and Do. Toilet need a brush? Swish swish, (wash your hands and) walk away. When you notice an item getting egregious, take a couple minutes, hit it and go back to whatever you were doing. Sure, you will still want to do "proper" cleaning, but in the meanwhile, things are more tolerable, it's a small thing so not overwhelming, and when you do a regular cleaning, it will be easier because it's less of a mess. Related to this, remember you can do things in rotation, which is a good way to get those less-frequent things done. Let's say... washing curtains (To those who are laughing now, pick your own thing! It's all I can think of atm.). They don't need to be done in an epic sweep. Do the one or two that need it the most (probably kitchen). Another time, do the second-most in need. Eventually you will get to all of them. And if you don't, you still have a cleaner appearance because you got the ones you see all the time.

2) When you clean, clean smart.
Gravity's going to work whether you've considered it or not. And if you don't consider it, you'll probably be re-doing something, and that's a waste of time.
Give cleaners a chance to do what you bought them for. If something needs to soak a bit, let it and go do something else nearby in the meanwhile. It will be so much easier (and faster!) when you go back to it. (This one seems obvious, but you'd be surprised how often it's zoomed past.)

3) I cannot stress enough what a HUGE LABOR-saver and TIME-saver this next one is. It also brings down the overwhelm factor way way down.
LESS STUFF!!! Good God almighty, just plain too much crap is the biggest issue I see again and again, and cannot believe how much of a roadblock people put in their own way with this. This not only applies to sheer quantity of possessions. Consider any room. Are there things all over the very items in need of cleaning? Why? Maybe some of them are justifiable. Most of them probably aren't. Even a semi-zealot like me is going to say, "screw it!" when faced with moving all that crap (and moving it back) every flippin' time just to clean it. Over-population of knick-knacks and doodads? Again, why? Same issue. Also consider this. They are presumably intentionally displayed items, right? (As opposed to, say, most of the stuff on the bathroom sink.) But when there are too many, it's a major league pain in the patootie to clean that zone. So it doesn't happen. There goes the visual delight they were intended to provide! (Unless of course, one finds dust a visual delight, lol!)

Ok, before I hit "tilt" on a rant.... know that I'm not ranting *at* anyone. It's just an observation of something that's a super-common hinderance to cleaning/keeping up/what have you. SO common in fact, that it tends to be a blindspot. It contributes SO heavily to overwhelm. And I rant because for the life of me I can't understand it. It seems so obvious, but clearly, it's not(!)

Footnotes: *Note how laundry proves #3. The laundry CAN'T get out of hand. Unless I want to become a nudist. Which I don't. Less stuff gets less out of control.
*Yes, I have gone a little nuts in the possession-accumulation department when hypo. But invariably, later on, I'd get to feeling like it was closing in and get rid of it just as vigorously. Never piled static stuff on things frequently needing cleaning.
*BF, ironically enough, has the "display item" issue in spades. Tiny, tippy and tons of 'em. I won't deal with them. It's ridiculous. Their zones are restricted, because if they were everywhere, I'd be launching every 5 minutes over knocking the damn things over just doing basic stuff. For the 10 seconds spent opening a window, 20 min would be spent setting them all back from falling down(!) A colossal time-waster.

[Anika.]

Originally Posted by Yoda

I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again. —Joan Rivers

Haha I love that!

Originally Posted by morethingswrong

Unless I am in a fetal position in bed from my pain.. my house is always being cleaned. It's not fun to be obsessed by cleaning that's for sure.

Thats soooo true!!

I was just thinking motivating kids to clean takes motivation itself. That is often more tiring than doing it myself.

And that I better get back to my own cleaning. I was deep cleaning my kitchen and I better get it done cause you know who still has up ALL their christmas decorations?? Well the decorations are still making it kinda cheery but ya.. I think my son doesn't want them up for his b-day in Febuary.

But I really love having a tree up, I love trees.. maybe I should just seasonally change the ornaments. No it's NOT a christmas tree... it's a birthday tree.. For you!! Love mom xox

[BlackPup]

When I was depressed we lived on frozen meals and takeaway. I have a cleaner that comes once a fortnight to clean the floors and the bathroom. I can keep the laundry and kitchen under control if I know the rest of the house is getting a clean every fortnight. I cook regularly now but opt for easy meals.

[Victoria'smom]

I second getting rid of all the clutter possible in your house. I have a set of 4 glasses, plates, bowls, and silverware (one for each family member) and as little as I can without getting into trouble with my boys. A lot of people use paper plates/cups. I let my son's room and bathroom be a mess. My son does his own laundry. I tend to have a lot of boxed banquet meals. When I can't really do laundry I don't sort. Cleaning is generally done by my husband or cousin in-law.

[creativelight]

Thank God I'm not alone! I'm so slow to even start doing the things! I hate it! Laundry is the worst, can't get myself to take the stuff into the drawers! Unless is my kids stuff, theirs I just do. I mean I've come long ways from where I was before getting married... Don't want to go there! Paint was in my clothes, walls, floors and the dishes in piles, let alone actual cleaning lol my OCD cleaning mom always had to help me. I felt useless!
Actually tomorrow I'm going to a dx hoping if I get medicated I will actually be able to get things more organized.

That was really cute, Innerzone. Thanks for that; I enjoyed it very much.

There's only one thing I can add to all that has been written: get the equipment
we need to make the job easier. For example, the right duster--strong, but easy
to clean, one that reaches the places we aren't tall enough to reach using a cloth
with furniture polish on it --is a big help.

And as for vacuum cleaners, I'd like one that digitally maps the room and then
goes about the job of vacuuming. It would help if it could resize itself to get
under the tv cabinet, my sofa, etc. when tight places are in front of it and
then be able to climb steps to vacuum the carpeted stairs. I'd be willing
to pay heavily to find one of those.

cleaning? oh no.... just the sight of that word makes me cringe