Problem Employee

You may or may not remember me saying that I referred the guy I live with for the temp position out here at the mine.

I did this out of the kindness of my heart and to help ease the tension financial problems were causing at home. I did not do it because I wanted to.

We worked together before. He got me my original job when I moved to this area. I hated working with him and was elated the day he left for his new job.

I have enjoyed working here at the mine very much, mainly for the people. They are mostly kind, understanding, team players and we all have a positive working relationship.

I was hoping his attitude and anger issues had changed, but unfurtunately they have not. His attitude is all negative, all the time. He doesn't just have a short temper, he has no temper, exploding on vendors and employees alike. He insults, degrades, and yells at everybody.

He is very hard of hearing, which causes people to become frustrated with him as he doesn't hear what they say, or only part of it, and brings them the wrong thing or doesn't do what they actually asked.

He has some complex that he is above everyone else, and that to do anything for them is a waste of his precious time. He was given an invoicing type position to get him out of the main warehouse, but this has not helped the problem as he constantly gets into pointless arguements with the other office worker, who I happen to have become good friends with.

I've received complaints about him from every other warehouse tech, as well as several other employees. The added stress he brings into the workplace with his poor attitude and lack of respect and willingness to work with others only compounds the stresses of the critical job that we do.

He brags about the poor way he treats his fiance. He talks bad on everyone else behind their backs. Its like he's gunning for an imaginary "Asshole of the Month" trophy.

I'm at the same point I was at the old job: I want to punch his face in on a daily basis. And somehow he wonders why I don't spend time at home anymore. He thinks I'm obsessed with *****, as he doesn't think I'm actually serious about my relationship with my gf, when really its to avoid him as much as possible.

He makes me so incredibly angry, I just want to explode. I've been shaking all day since I got here. I want so badly to put him in his place in front of everyone, but I hold my tongue knowing that such an action would result in a response of "Well you can find a new place to live then," and although I'd love to, I'm not in the financial postion to do so. Not to mention I really don't want to lose the excellent hunting oppurtunities, and I'm a groomsman in his wedding in October.

More or less, I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place and its significantly affecting my mood and well being.

What should I do?

Can't you just mumble a quiet "dude, why you be that way?" to him next time when he does something particularly egregious or a-hole-ily? Then if he says "what did you say?!" deny you said anything. I thought that's how he-men types communicated. How come I have to teach you this?!! . Good luck!

Even something that suttle would result in an eviction notice. lol

I forgot to mention he's about 5'2" and 140lbs on a good day and has little-BIG-man syndrome to the max

So you live in his apartment? and he is your employe? not sure if I'm getting that right. Then he could evict you and you could fire him? Big conflict of interest here.

At some point people have to learn the respect lesson the hard way. He could choose to do things differently. There is no reason why you need to sacrifice your health when he doesn't appreciate it. I'd give him the boot even if he would evict you - especially if you can afford to get your own place. You don't deserve the crap he's dishing out. He's being a bully. The other employees don't deserve that either.

Hey ManicMiner (cute username btw),
I feel so bad for you, that is a really crappy situation. I mean you basically spend every waking minute with eachother.

The way I see it, you can either confront him like an adult, or keep this all bottled up inside you.

I have a family member or two whom I'd like to put in their place and tear them a new "bodypart". But I do what my husband suggests and think about the consequences, like you mentioned that you've been doing for a while now.

I would set aside a time that you could just sit him down and politely make some suggestions about how he might adjust his attitude/behavior at work. Tell him that you've gotten the complaints from people. I mean, does he know that it's going on? Does he know people don't care for him?

I can empathize with having bad hearing, mine probably isn't as bad as his but, it can get really frustrating in social situations. I often times feel left out if I miss part of a story, or if I can't hear someone because their voice is too soft. This may be a part of why he's angry.

There's 2 possibilities, either a. he genuinely has no idea that people don't like him/his attitude, or b. he knows it and doesn't care. If he just doesn't even care, it's going to be hard to give him that kick in the bum that he needs to realize how difficult he is.

If I am being a certain way, most of the time I don't even know it. So if someone came to me and said "people don't like you because of x,y,z".. usually, I get upset/hurt that someone feels that way, I try to fix it. It's really going to come down to, does he care enough about you and your friendship to budge just a little bit to help make your life easier?....

No I live with him in the home he inherited, along with his fiance and her 7 year old daughter.

We are co-workers, I have zero authority over him. I referred him for the position to my boss because he was out of work for several months.

Do you think there are problems he has you don't know about?

Hit it right on the head....

That's what I was afraid of

Oh he's got plenty of problems that I've picked up on. His dad never gave him constructive criticism. Only "that's stupid" "why do you have to be so weak" and the like.

So he idolizes his grandfather, who was old school, and tries to live how he did. Things like a woman's place is in the kitchen and subordinate, to answer to his every beck and call, things that were commonplace in the 50's-70's but have no place today.

He has a partial college education, which automatically makes him smarter and more skilled at everything than anyone who only has a highschool education.

Plus his size and going to highschool in WV for a time as a transfer kid. Its like he's stuck in highschool where he constantly had to be a tough guy and impress people for attention.

He has a whole herd of animals for his pork and beef business and for 4-H projects for the girl, mainly so he can be associated with having the prize winning animals at the fairs like he did in his 4-H days. And he makes the fiance do the large majority of the work, 100% of the daily feeding, watering and cleaning pens.

Add the stress of getting married and a fiance who's ex is a psychotic criminal and creates all kinds of havoc.

He needs to learn how to leave all that at home where it belongs. He's a self proclaimed asshole, with no tolerance for things different. He's a know-it-all, is never wrong, and if you contradict anything he believes is fact, even if he's dead wrong, you've got hell to pay.

Its incredibly difficult for me to keep my mouth shut. Any retalliation I have tried has led to threats of eviction, so I've learned to just tone him out and avoid him. Luckily we work differnt shifts

Difficult position for you. Sounds like he's on his way to gettin fired, that would solve a problem, but then he'll still be a **** when he's sittin at home. What if you ask him if he's tryin to get fired cuz people are talkin (like the complaints you're hearing about) Idk miner, bad situation

Since he is such a joy to be around (sigh) Just let him keep on running his mouth and let him get fired, I would assume that many many people are probably getting tired of his mouth and will complain to there bosses.. The economy sucks so employers figure there is hundreds of other people who want that job. Sorry he sounds like a complete idiot. I hope eventually you will beable to get your own place. The hunting land .. Yeah I get that !

I would just wait. Has anyone said anything to you about recommending him? He doesn't reflect negativity on you, he's his own employee, let him talk himself out of a job if need be.