Does anyone else experienced mania this way?

When I first learned about Bipolar Disorder I always thought manic episodes included feelings of general awesomeness… feeling super elated, talkative, high energy, euphoria, etc etc…

Anyway, I’ve been stable on medication for a few months now, very happy to announce that I sometimes think “I’m not bipolar… I was just at bad time in my life” It’s so easy for me to I guess “brush bipolar under the rug” when I’m stable and think that I’m not really bipolar. When I’m stable it’s really easy for me to forget what it’s like to be bipolar… does that make sense?

SO… about a week ago I missed a days worth of medication, and I finally felt what it was like to feel “manic” again the following day. I knew I was feeling way different, knew it was because I went without my meds for an entire day and it was TERRIBLE. I took out my phone at one point and begin describing my symptoms so I would know and recognize them if I was ever manic again… (also to report to my therapist and pdoc) Here’s what I wrote regarding feeling manic:

- Extremely all of the following:
- Irritable
- Impatient
- Anxious
- Indecisive
- Feeling “lost” like I don’t know what to do with myself
- Paranoid
- A general feeling as if “everyone’s out to get me”
- Road rage: Everyone is driving like a snail and it pisses me off

Anyway… I guess this post is more or less just curious if there are other people out there that experience mania in the type of way I do.

I also took note of my hypomanic symptoms and listed them as:

- If & when it happens, it usually happens soon after waking up
- I have an exuberant amount of energy
- Very talkative
- Feeling extremely “goofy”
Ex – Dancing around the room, signing in the shower, making funny faces at my partner, talking about random "goofy" stuff
- Feeling a constant need of attention and affection from my partner

Sorry this was so long… just trying to reach out to people who might also be feeling how I am. Thanks!

*Correction!

Does anyone else EXPERIENCE mania this way? sorry :P

My mania symptoms are a combo. Mainly it's that feeling of "awesomeness" but I'm very impulsive and that leads to trouble. I know I can be irritable and impatient but while I'm in this state I don't realize I'm acting this way even when I feel like superman doing anything. While its happening I usually don't realize right away. I just laugh at everything, purposely try to annoy everyone and anyone, mind races etc.

Yes I do. Absolutely. I may have high energy and I may be very talkative but both surround irritability and anxiety. I would say I usually feel all of the things you listed, usually without paranoia. I have found that the reason I do not experience euphoria or elation is because I am almost immediately aware that it is mania, and then immediately become unhappy, anxious, and lost because I don't enjoy or want to be out of control. It is really uncomfortable to experience mania this way, I almost wish I felt the euphoria sometimes, but you are not the only one who does.

I experience a lot of what was on your first list. Like one poster stated I also do not recognize the behaviors at the time. I've been stable since October (Lithum). Last spring & summer was my first manic episode. I was out of control. I was hanging out all hours of the party, wanting to go out every weekend, shopping, putting myself in dangerous situations, irritable, getting pissed at slow traffic, getting pissed at slow lines in stores.

That describes me a lot for mania and hypomania.

Plus throw in some weird obsessive things.

MD07, your description of your hypo/mania fits me to a "T" as well. I have both euphoric and dysphoric types. I love the euphoric times when I have NO limits and I can go and do and work and shop and play! But then I have the episodes (like now) when I'm merely irritable, agitated, jittery, anxious, and I walk around trying to find a place for myself because I don't quite know what to do.

This is the most accurate description of my extreme hypomania which (turned into a mixed episode) recorded in a FB note July 2011:

Thoughts racing, can't hold a single train of
thought, looping in my head, round and round
they go. I cleaned my r0om and did the washing, i'm
Hungry like i haven't eaten in days, my body is
burning fr0m the energy emanating from it.
Sounds are LOUDER, music make the
thoughts spin faster, forgetting how to spell,find
it hard to c0nstruct a sentence but i want to
TALK TALK TALK! Can't c0ncentrate 4 shyt but I
can c0nquer the w0rld,i'm capable,and i'll do it
in stilletto's, bursting with happiness, I LOVE U
ALL, and guess what? I LOVE ME 2! This is fun at
first but it bec0mes unbearable, because I start getting agitated and irratable, extremely aggressive...

So yes I get the elation and euphoria, but it does turn ugly

I totally agree with you, I get the same way when i'm manic/mixed. I always feel really agressive, and even if I think I'm calm, any little thing can set me off.

I often get that way when I'm mixed, or hypomanic. I have more "irritable" episodes than "elated" ones

Hi, I have dysphoric mania. What is that? Well, it's like mania except you're not feeling awesome or elated. You race and race but you are angry, irritable, easily upset, everything is annoying, you just feel uncomfortable and not very happy at all. But you feel like you're going 100 miles and hour. I still have racing thoughts, pressured speach, grandios thinking, and all of that. But I feel terrible! No euphoria for me.

I have rapid cycling and lots of mixed states, so that's a big part of it, I think.