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#151
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I am feeling really good today. I was in such a down ward spiral before I went into the hospital the last time that when I started to do a upward climb I thought I was starting a hypo stage I told my Dr this and he told me I might not be manic but just happy and that I had not had this feeling for so long that I did not recognize it. I still have some manic episodes but they are not to bad if I feel like I am going to fast I take a pill to help myself cause when I come down on my own I come down hard.
Sent from my SGH-T769 using Tapatalk 4 |
![]() Blue_Bird
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#152
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Feeling horribly depressed, I'm just done with everything. I'm never going to get anywhere in life I might as well quit now.
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() A Red Panda, Anonymous200280, Anonymous45023, bumble2u, shezbut
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#153
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Feeling a bit "stuck" today. Like my thoughts arnt following through, and Im procrastinating on things I could be doing. I have nothing exciting or strenuous planned for today, I think that might have something to do with it.
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![]() A Red Panda
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#154
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Riding a long wave of exaggerated and elevated moods.
I think right now I actually SHOULD be depressed...but you know what? I am not depressed and I am happy about it. I am tired of tucking my tail between my legs and crawling back for more. It's time I stood up for myself and those who have been my masters are now unhappy with me. So be it. |
![]() Anonymous200280
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#155
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empty and depressed.
another weekend slowly going to waste.. |
![]() Anonymous37807
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#156
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Im really proud of myself today. Despite feeling like I did earlier I pushed through it and got on with life. Did my mindfulness cd, got on the bike, played with my horse, visited with a friend and did all the housework. Now I am about to head out to a party. Not something I particularly want to do but something perhaps I need to do. I am anxious about it, I cant pinpoint exactly what is making me anxious but I am going with an attitude that I am going there to have fun, and I will.
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#157
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You know you are stressed out and miserable when you wake up and are already feeling ill from the stress and your first thought is that you wish you hadn't waken up.
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"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
#158
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day seems to be going okay so far.
i'm excited because i'm getting a KFC baught home for me... and i can't wait mmm! later tonight my mom's having some friends round for dinner, but i'm going to close my door- which will more than likely avoid me getting overly anxious... i'll let you all know about that |
#159
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Messed up my sleep schedule to play Pokemon y.
Heartburn from late night coffee NO HAIR GUIDE. How am I supposed to make myself cute?!?!?! ;(
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"You got to fight those gnomes...tell them to get out of your head!" |
#160
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No matter how tired I get, I always try to stay up after my wife and daughter go to bed. By the time my wife puts my daughter down we are both normally pretty tired, so she normally falls asleep. This is kind of a problem because we both want time together in the evenings after our daughter goes down. But once they are both asleep, I just want to stay up and up and up! Sometimes working, sometimes cleaning, sometimes watching netflix, whatever... But I'll routinely stay up until 12 or 1, sometimes as late as 3 or 4, even when I have to get up at 6:30, which is 5 days a week. Is this bp? I have this feeling like it is of the utmost importance that I be alone with my thoughts, you know? It's already a crowd in there, it is very taxing for me to deal with people all day, by 9PM I just want to be alone and I am happy to forego sleep to be alone, but obviously this is unhealthy and feeds into hypomania down the line.
Does anyone experience this? Any suggestions? MT
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Whether you are a big deal or a small deal, there is always some kind of a deal going on. - Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche |
#161
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Quote:
Sent from my Note 2 using Tapatalk 4
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Dx: BP2 with GAD and OCD Seroquel 100 mg Risperdal 0.5 mg Clonazepam (Klonopin) 1.5 mg Buspar 5 mg Lamictal 200 mg Coversyl Plus for high blood pressure Crestor for high cholesterol Asmanex Ventolin ![]() |
![]() shezbut
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#162
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Things are going pretty good mood-wise. I feel like the medication adjustment really helped me
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__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() Phoenix_1
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#163
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Quote:
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#164
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little annoyed all ready today.
posted on my tech forum about a problem i was having with mazilla firefox, and some smart person decided to reply by saying... well, it's not our problem- go figure it out i'm like, uh... that's why i am posting on a support network to try and get um, support? so yes i had a bit of an argument with them apart from that, okay i guess... a little annoyed to that i never got my KFC yesterday but maybe tonight my brother says |
#165
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Lots of racing thoughts, my mind wont seem to settle down. I did get some good sleep last night, almost 8 hours. Still not having the depression, so I guess I am half "healed" and now I need to see what we can do for the hypo side of my bp2.
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#166
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It's Thanksgiving here in the great white north....
I'm hiding out for the day. I could go and have thanksgiving dinner at a friend's house... but I can't handle the thought. They have a family of 4, plus I know at least 3 others who will be there.. and the table barely seats 4. And I don't want to bring my houseguest there and it will be too many people. And holidays are miserable. Every day so far I wake up feeling tense and tight and like I am going to throw up. I know it's a stress reaction. But it's still how I feel. My friend has picked a departure date though - the 23. He's here for such a long time ![]()
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
#167
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Having a good day today.
Trying to figure out what I want to do as far as college goes. I really should start taking classes again. I feel like I'm ready for it. I've also been putting in job applications. Trying to get over my horrible anxiety and fear of having an interview. The Klonopin is supposed to help with that, we'll see when the time comes, hopefully I don't start shaking uncontrollably like last time. Last night I felt on the verge of hypomania but I think I was just in a really good mood. I'm so happy to have stability now ![]()
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
#168
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I'm spending Thanksgiving alone this year. Is this what the rest of my life will look like? I feel very depressed. Fall is here and the winter looks very bleak.
Sent from my Note 2 using Tapatalk 4
__________________
Dx: BP2 with GAD and OCD Seroquel 100 mg Risperdal 0.5 mg Clonazepam (Klonopin) 1.5 mg Buspar 5 mg Lamictal 200 mg Coversyl Plus for high blood pressure Crestor for high cholesterol Asmanex Ventolin ![]() |
![]() Blue_Bird, bumble2u
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#169
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Son brought home by police at 1am apparently under the influence and smelling of pot. Nice officer, not sure how to proceed. Really disappointed in my sons choices and that he lied to me about where he was. Grounding is inevitable plus careful monitoring. Feel I have failed actually worse than this Feel maybe it would be better if i disappear. Obviously i am a sh** mother. Tried to explain consequences of actions. Behaviour will have to regain trust. my head is spiralling and am on the edge of doing something stupid. but that wont help him so i must get over myself. Rules laid down very clearly. Love for son expressed. Was clear and concise in talking., aplogy from son was forth coming why do I want to hurt me?
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Lithium750mg Seroquel 400mg Synthoid 25mg [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] |
![]() Anonymous200280
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#170
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(((Hugs))))
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Lithium750mg Seroquel 400mg Synthoid 25mg [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] |
#171
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it's been a very quiet day (as usual)
really not much to say.. again, didn't have my KFC- store was closed!. ugg |
#172
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Doing ok, trying to stay busy. That's why I've been scarce lately. Took my son out shopping Saturday and went to my mom's. Today we went to the pumpkin patch and bought Halloween costumes. Tomorrow starts a very busy work week for me and that's usually where the depression kicks in because I HATE my job but I'm stuck (financially) there. I've applied for other jobs to no avail.
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[COLOR="DeepSkyBlue"][FONT="Century Gothic"]Dx: Bipolar II w/mixed episodes, PTSD, Anxiety Disorder, Insomnia Rx: Lamictal 100mg, Zoloft 75mg, Klonopin 0.5mg x1 /0.25 PRN “Insanity is knowing that what you're doing is completely idiotic, but still, somehow, you just can't stop it.” ― Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation |
![]() Blue_Bird, shezbut
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#173
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been a slow day, hub left for dc, son and I watched tv, I've been trying to write a story. I'm not sure I like it that much so far, lots of tweaking ahead I think. But the sex is great lol.
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#174
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I just dont know anymore.
The depression is gone but the rest of the disorder is doing its own thing. I wish I could just shut off my mind for a little while and rest. |
![]() shezbut
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#175
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I did something somewhat reckless and have only been able to sleep at most 3 hours a night the past few days, this can't be good
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
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