some of those nights, loads of them..heaps..somethin' like that

Im ok, work today, had to clean a penthouse kitchen for 7 1/2 hours that some rich kid destroyed. At least took my mind off things for a while . Physically tired. Got a bit of sleep last night but not much.

Mental Reward, sorry to hear that too. Cancer really sucks the big one. I am bipolar 1, yes I have been full blown manic with psychosis more times than I could ever count. I have usually fallen on the manic side of the coin. I am med free but have not had any episodes since, and its just coming up two years. So I feel comfortable with that. The thing is to keep it that way I have to sleep right. That was always a huge factor for me. I will try antihistamines, I have a lot of allergies so I always have some on hand. Good idea. Thank you!

Thanks for checking in with me all of you!! It's very nice to feel cared about in times like these. I have beenna bit of an isolist latelty. I am gonna go for a run tonight tho, I think that might help. I have got my 5k down pretty good now. love you guys toooooo!!!!

Blue,

Thanks so much, I needed that. That actually helps a lot, just need reminded sometimes, easy to get a little lost in things, but that absolutely helps. And thanks for the kind words too. Right back at you

The kids are ok , I told them but gently and without to much upset. I will wait till I find out more before telling them too much. They are pretty strong kids. They are not very close with my mom, taking it pretty well so far.

Wow, that's great that your med free and stable for two yrs! My last manic episode also w psychosis was a year ago. It is too scary of me, and for the love of my family for me to go off of my meds bc I have been stable. Hopefully I won't the rest of my life... It's nice to hear that..

Yes! Benadryl. It does wonders. My doc recommends it I fact for sleep bc it is dependency free. Though now she prescribed me vistaril also in the histamine family bc my sleep was getting too disturbed and making my anxiety and panic levels profoundly worse. Hope it helps for sure!!!

You are an inspiration.

Just as a side note - have you ever tried any calming teas? I always take hours to fall asleep, its not unusal or annoying for me but recently I tried (again) on sleepytime tea. I couldnt believe it but it knocked me out! It doesnt *always* knock me out but it does make me calmer and in the right mindset to slip off to sleep. I figure when it gets that bad, anything is worth a try.