Help!!! Being open about bipolar at work

My bosses are pushing me to mania and I'm thinking about coming out. I haven't slept in days because I've been working back to back 15 hour shifts and I have school work. I started out with As, but now I'm leaning to the failure side. I didn't take my midterm exam because of work and I'm crying at work. Everything makes me angry now and I don't make sense which makes me more angry. I started eating less because I'm starting to no longer care about my health. My bosses call me everyday to fill in shifts, but it just f^^^ing can't. If I don't take shifts I get written up for it and can get fired. Idk what to do. I just want to hurt myself so badly and cry.

I think you should call your dr first and ask what he/she thinks you should do. Obviously this just can't continue or you are going to have an episode, it sounds like you are close already. I'm so sorry you are being put in this position. You might have to come out to them but I would think getting your dr's help, a note of some sort to make it legal so you have something to say why you need to have them accommodate you as far as hours and such. When I had to postpone my student teaching a semester because of my breakdown, my dr wrote a note to my advisors. I got an incomplete for the semester and was able to do the student teaching the following semester. I say call your dr first and let him/her know your situation.

(((BUNCHES OF HUGS)))

I'm so sorry you're having a hard time! I understand where you're coming from.

I talked to my therapist about it before I did anything. She was able to help me decide how I was going to approach it with my boss, what I might say. We worked through the possible scenarios so that I was prepared. It really helped me.

Best of luck!!

You're open at your work about it? Do your bosses treat you any differently and has being open helped you?

Ironically enough, health care is one of the WORST occupations for people with mental illness. The judgmentalism is unbelievable.....and so is the ignorance, even among supposedly educated people.

There is very little to be gained from disclosing MI in the workplace. You and I have discussed this before; I still say you need to find another job, and put the majority of your energies into your schooling. That job will shove you headlong into a mood episode---you've got one brewing already---and trust me when I tell you: it's not worth it!!!

I was in a high-paying executive nursing position which damn near put me in the hospital; I wound up losing it to a bad mixed episode, and now I can't even use that company as a reference even though I worked for them almost 3 years. Now I'm in something that doesn't really give me enough hours to live on, but unlike the executive job, it's low stress and I can handle it.

Don't keep taking this risk with your mental health. The more episodes you have, the harder they become to control. This job is SO not worth it. Get out while you can!

I pretty much had to. I was crying at my desk nearly every day and having horrible daymares. Like I said earlier, I talked to my therapist and we decided it was best. I had a very understanding boss. She was great. She treated me the same as before. It really helped me to be able to tell her. After I "came out" I was able to come to her when I felt myself slipping. We would evaluate my workload and do some restructuring until I was better. It was a relief. My stress level significantly decreased!

What else would I do though? Every cna position is like that in my area since it's a densely populated region. I just want 40 hours a week throughout the week, that's all I ask for

I honestly would like to work part time and focus on my neglected life, but idk what to do about bills with 25 hour weeks. Also, they part time cnas are also working 50+ hours a week so that wouldn't help me much. My job is generally easy, but 5 hours sleep a day or no sleep for a 15 hour shift ruins me. It seems like everyone else, but me struggles with this.

CNA? Akkkkk did that for years... Yes it will damn near kill ANYONE let alone dealing with Bipolar. I had to get out of it !!!!

One thing you can do is "catch the flu" Get a note from your Doctor and it will give you at least 3 or more likely 5 days to catch a breather so you can think about your options and just give your mind and body some rest.

As BRN said the medical field is horrible when it comes to having an illness of any kind. Seriously you can't continue this way.

Take care of you.

Why is the medical field so bad in regards to employees having mental illnesses?

What I finally did was apply for "Intermittent FMLA" -you fill out an application (you can get it from HR), provide supportive documentation from your providers (they fill out a form) re diagnosis, treatment plan, time off for appointments, acute episodes, etc. and it goes to HR for consideration. If you're a CNA at a hospital (I don't know if elsewhere) you will have an Occupational Health department (they're the ones who make sure you get your annual PPD, etc.) and they are the ones who make the decision. Otherwise, I guess it's HR.

What's great about this, is that no information goes to your boss except that your application has been approved (and I guess specifics like time off for appointments and related (unnamed) illness approved); your medical information remains confidential. To me this is ideal: you get official recognition of your 'partial disability', with the accommodations you need/might need, while keeping your med info private.

Again, if you work for a hospital, you should have an Employee Assistance Program --I started by talking to someone there about my concerns (my boss what giving me a lot of flak for my appointments -psych & for medical conditions- during work hours) and they helped me find the information I needed, and pointed me towards websites re disability rights in the workplace.

I just don't think it's a good idea to share diagnosis with managers -them not understanding, stigma, them seeing it as an excuse for behavior, etc. I'd try to get what you need while bypassing revealing such information to your boss. As I say, you can contact HR.

I hope, though, you find a way to work less hours, or find a job where you can. As bipolarnurse I had a managerial position in healthcare and it was a nightmare for my stability: the long hours, always on call, etc. Now I work hourly, but I'm in a position where overtime is optional. If I want, I can earn extra money covering all kinds of shifts, but I don't have to.

Best of luck.

I don't have a great answer for that, but after working in healthcare for over ten years there tends to be a culture of 'suck it up.' I don't know if it's part of the culture of not showing our emotions/staying strong in the face of all of the terrible things we see, and somehow this carries over to how mental illness amongst employees is viewed (high value on keeping your emotions in check). Maybe, because of the nature of our work, caring for very vulnerable people, there is a higher bar as far as how mentally healthy we need to be to be able to help these people. Maybe both, maybe more.

I work for a very small home care agency and there are several nurses that run it. We don't have an HR department because we're so tiny, about 50 employees or so. The work is easier than working in a nursing home, but I struggle a lot if I work too much. I feel like a lost cause because I can't work at a hospital or a nursing home as a cna because I will break down from too much interaction with people and too much stress. I worked in retail at 3am in the mornings stocking shelves, but even that caused me mental breakdowns. My boss let me leave when ever I wanted though because I always told her I needed to study for school; I stayed at that job for about half a year until I quit from not being able to handle myself.

I'm so stupid, I don't even understand why I exist. I wish I could let them know I need to work less hours, but they always worm my schedule with more hours than I ask for. They don't care about the health of the employees, but where else would I work? I'm so stressed that I stop eating meals and I've only been eating snacks. Everything seems to taste bad and give me the runs. I guess I don't expect an answer from anyone anymore and this is more of a pathetic rant.

Hey, I may not be able to offer advice, but I'm answering anyway because I care. Don't give up!

Thank you CG. I think the non eating is from depression, I think SAD just kicked in :/

Major hugs to you, medical fox! I was in teaching field, not medical, so don't know bout that! But sure can relate! And in military as well!!!! Only thing I can manage now is writing, but I see that some who replied are making things work out ok, and i know some folks personally who have had success in coming out. Not so much me, unfortunately! However, I like the answers folks gave you here about taking some time off, talking to therapist, etc. and I found those to be be helpful as well. I care, and I wish you all the best!!!!!!

Thankfully my employees are also family friends. I just straight told them. And when I am not manic I don't mind filling in shifts but I told them last week that I only want my original 2 days that are only 4 hour days. That I will let them know when I am ready for more. So basically, I know where you are coming from a little bit. Hope it all goes well for you