[EternalWinter]

Its more like, random, high and lows, sometimes feeling 'hypo during the day' and down again by night time. Or the other way around.

When I feel my mood is high I tend to feel like a lot how people talk about on here, feeling energetic, happy, feeling i can do anything and can get aggressive. I used to have tremors when I got it because it would trigger anxiety, but now I just go with it.

I just wish I could have normal highs and lows. So treatment wouldnt be so complicated. Like half the time when I go back a week later seeing how a med is working I feel totally different. Depending on how im doing that week or that day.

I dont know. Maybe my memory has become so bad I simply dont remember. I do have times of depression for up to two months. But I only remember depression lasting that long... once. But I think the past month, I been depressed. the last time it lasted for a month was last year.

But most of the time. I dont know, I feel im all over the map all the time. Most of the time when I feel "normal" I really feel heavy headedness and stupid.

I think it could maybe be from switching medications all the time. I dont know. I am seeing a new doc next week and im getting a second opinion.... I just wish I had a cycle, Id rather be depressed or hypo then feeling a bit of both all the time and it spiking up and down.

Maybe this is the effect of medications and if this is what they are supposed to do.. I just go off...

[IndieVisible]

I've gone 2-3 years at or close enough to baseline I did not feel like any thing was wrong, I know when it's time to get help. I always go off meds when I feel better. Why not enjoy normal with no meds for as long as you can? I've actually gone 5 years once. Tho usually it's every other year or off and on. This has been going on since at least 1987 for me. I can't tell you how many times I thought they were wrong or I was cured. It is easier remembering the depression

[~Christina]

I once asked my Doctor why couldn't I be easy to treat like other Bipolar people .. He laughed and said NO one with Bipolar is easy to treat .. medication that might work for a month for me might work for days or a year for others. You will seldom find a Bipolar person that doesn't needs changes in medications now and again.

Keeping a mood chart can be helpful in seeing possible mood shifts. If you really are feeling up and down so many times in a week then your Pdoc needs to take a closer look to see just where you are on the Bipolar spectrum and adjust medications (If you choose medications ) to treat the symptoms.

Do you have a tool box of non medication tools you can use when your moods shift ? ie: Meditation, mindfulness, self grounding, exercise, diet, self soothing , music , art, or just plain owning your self and well being.

There are many ways to cope and handle Bipolar .

[vans1974]

Sorry to hear!!! Are you taking a mood stabilizer like Abilify or Latuda?

[Jcon614]

I love this, Christina! Thank you.

[IndieVisible]

Starting a journal and mood chart was definitely a eye opener for me! Excellent advice!

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by IndieVisible

Starting a journal and mood chart was definitely a eye opener for me! Excellent advice!

I agree. I've never done a mood chart, but my blog keeps track of my moods very well.

[IndieVisible]

Originally Posted by Moose72

I agree. I've never done a mood chart, but my blog keeps track of my moods very well.

I read your blog some times! That's a great idea too.

[Alokin]

Originally Posted by IndieVisible

I read your blog some times! That's a great idea too.

Me too, it is really good!

[Moose72]

Well I'm flattered, Alokin and Indie. Thank you!

[EternalWinter]

I have been on lithium for over a year it helped almost 100% during the first month. During a month or two in id be singing at work and have hypomania all day with little sleep. My Pdoc then upped the lithium to 1200 and then it made me feel utterly sick in the mornings so I went back to 900. Then I got depressed. My pdoc gave me lactimal, worked great in the first week but then I got a rash.

I went on an anti depressant and got very anxious and irritable. He told me to take seroquel for depression but all it did was make it worse cause it would make me more tired. I saw him a week later and I felt good so he scedualed my next appointment three months ahead of time and within a week I felt crazy again. sometimes I felt like assaulting people who looked at me while shopping, because i felt they were looking down on me and I felt like attacking them by bashing their face in with a can of soup. I even told him that. He didnt have a solution besides to take the mid fogging anti psychotics

I no longer see that Pdoc and ran out of lithium I went to a walk in last week and instaid of lithium he gave me trazodone and another anti depressant that I stopped because side effects were intolerable

Just yesterday when I wrote this thred and thought I was going into a consistent depression. No, I spiked my hair and just felt awesome, worked out so much my arms hurt like never before. I was doing task to task. layd in bed all night and got mad at my GF when she asked where I was going because I couldnt stop thinking about how she ruined my life by moving in. I was so angry. But didnt say why because I didnt want to say anything id regret.

Now today I feel energetic. woke up at 6 am. I dont know if 100 mg of trazodone could swing my mood in a few hours. but it seems to be what happened.

I have no explanation. Obviously I will talk to the doc about it this week. I just dont know where to start, what to say. I will start keeping track of my moods starting today. But I just dont see the point if im on medication because maybe its triggering or causing my moods. I dont know.

[syizzle]

Yes like others have said do a mood journal that's how we caught that I rapid cycle 3 week depression 8-10 days manic on average it keeps moving a bit which we also caught with the journal

Christina knows her ****! I'd take her advice. Don't worry about your past experiences -- concern yourself with what you can do to take control of your moods.

A lot of people with Bipolar also have problems with emotional lability. Being able to control how they feel or respond to their feelings. That might be another reason why you tend to spike multiple times in a day or from one day to the next... But everything Christina suggested can help with that too!

Get workin' & good luck!