Dating

When do you tell people you have bipolar, and what do you say?

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I tell everybody that I'm bipolar now that I'm on a mission here in Colorado to force our state judicial system to comply with the Americans with Disabilities Act and the U.S. Constitution Amendment 14 requiring our courts to be fully accessible to those with mental illnesses. But this doesn't answer your question.

Before my activist stance, I would only tell others of my bipolar disorder when I felt they had a need to know. Obviously, you're not going to go out with a potential partner and announce on the first couple of dates that you're bipolar. You might chase them away by their own fears of the dreaded BP. But don't keep it a secret either. Use your intuition to be your guide in informing others of your condition. If, at that point, they choose to disassociate with you, then they are not good friend or companion material anyway.

You ask what do you say to introduce the subject. Just whatever feels most comfortable to you. For example, I wouldn't advise anyone to list off each and every visit to the psyche ward, or how you took off to New York City to get a part on a Broadway musical. Stick to the basics.

14th Amendment?

The last part besides being good advice is classic!

I havent had to tell anyone that im bipolar because I was with my current significant other when I got dx but I'm not very shy about it. I just simply say...I am bipolar...lol..I make jokes about it..Like my friends will say about other people your a ****** or crazy and I'll say no I'm the crazy one lol..

I would wait a bit (like a month) so they got the chance to get to know me well then I told them I was bipolar, I'm medicated, and so on.

My current boyfriend actually knew I was bipolar before we started dating because a mutual friend of ours told him as a "heads up". So when I told my boyfriend a month later he told me he knew and actually did his own research on it so that was pretty helpful.

I wouldn't tell anyone if you don't need to.

For me, everybody is on a "need to know" basis and very few people on the planet need to know.

I for the most part wait a little before telling people (not just for dating). Just because saying "I'm bipolar and on psychotropic medications" doesn't really sound so great on a first date lol. Let them get to know you for awhile that way they're not making judgement before they even get to know you :P. Though my last girlfriend knew I was bipolar before we got together and knew a lot of the stuff I have gone through... but yet still ended up dating me for a year and a half.

My current boyfriend told me he suffers from bipolar on our second date. I appreciated his honesty and candor, although he followed it up by saying I could walk out of the date if I wanted to. Obviously, I didn't. I'm trying to educate myself on his illness, and the cycles and triggers. We talk about it when he needs to, and when I'm curious.

Also - there's a difference between BP1 and BP2. As you appear to know, you can always supplement your on-line information by checking in here. I'm glad you've chosen us to fill in the gaps.

I didn't know I had bipolar but I do have negative things that needed to be said if I was dating to be serious. So when he asked me out I made sure I heard him right then told him before you decided to date me you need to know x about me. Do you still want to date me? Then I said yes.

Some things you should never share! But because your intimate partner(s), friends, and associates will be exposed to your symptoms eventually, it's best to get your illness out into the open A.S.A.P.

When I feel close to them and when there's a girl that interests me. I try hard to explain it simply from the scientific aspect and answer any questions. I found that using some scientific terms such as mood stabilizers, hypomania etc that most people don't know adds points to my explanation. "Oh you've searched it a lot!" I may seem a little wiser than I am but I don't want to do it on purpose!
In any case I believe it helps a lot to clear things up and decide who are the people that worth being around you.

Major tranquilizer sounds much better than anti-psychotic.

There is no "right" time. I'd known my boyfriend for two months before we began dating, and I told him during week 3 of dating. It only seemed fair. I wanted him to know just as we were getting serious, but without getting so serious that it would be unfair not to tell him.

Yeah. So just exactly how do you broach the subject that your schizophrenic? Hey babe, by the way, I'm criminally insane. Bipolar seems chic by comparison.

Well I was treated for schizophrenia (long story, well not really. Shrink was incompetent. The longer story is why I saw him for 7 years.) for 7 years.

I found people didn't know what to do with that information, that I am (was) schizophrenic. Some thought it meant I had multiple personalities. My parents said they wouldn't have had me if they knew I was going to have these problems. It is hard to relate to. But everyone has good moods and bad moods so bipolar is easier to understand.

After I first got sick and after I smoked weed I had a delusion that I was in Vietnam. I told this to a couple of people and they found it incredibly outrageous.

Wondering the same. To be honest, personally I try to hide it for as long as humanly possible. I understand that is not the healthy choice though

I like that intro - "Hey babe, but the way, I'm criminally insane." Actually, I use a version of that, " . . . and at trial, they gave me a not-guilty by reason of insanity verdict."

Not to be a jerk...

But I try to tell people way early on.
Like, in casual conversation.

Part of that is to gauge their response to things like that.
Part of it is, if they have no actual cue what bipolar or ocd or autism is ACTUALLY about, like ZERO idea, we probably won't have a lot to talk about.

This is not because I consider them ignorant, but because a lot of my interests are or overlap with brain stuff- psychology, biology, neurology, personality theory stuff, brains, whatever.
Somewhere in there a person is going to have some exposure to those things.

If you have no everloving clue... we probably won't have enough overlapping interests.

Just saying.